the promises
were too high
the cost of failing
to meet them
will show
in due time

a man without a gun
can still ****

with a word or without
an unsaid goodbye

to plunge a knife into a chest
pierces a heart and leaves it bleeding

a pool of crimson settling around
his feet

he will move away
when it gets too close to his toes

repulsed, not by his act
but by his lover's final offering

that means nothing to him

bloodsucker
night terror
ghosts that haunt the sheets
I sleep under

black heart
bleeding ink
desperate to write, but the words
won’t cut loose from my throat

black cloud
black dog
biting
teeth bared, ready to taste blood

I sink deeper into misery
looking for a hand
to pull me out of this ocean
of despair

on reflection
this year has held more grief than joy
but grief and joy and be held
in the same palm of your hand
and blossom into a new bloom of hope
it’s okay if all you did was survive
next year will be your year
to thrive

I see your eyes
false stars in a faithless sky
begging us to try again

but luck runs dry, like water
and dull sparks cannot reignite a fire
the burnt out, long ago

I miss your touch
but it no loner warms me
or reaches my heart

farewell, faithless sky
I have to say goodbye

my heart bleeds

not for you

but for the you I used to know

black mist falls
like night
and it is always night

(here)

where the shadows dance
and ghosts play poker
with my heart

I am not in control
of my mind

(you see)

I am its player
acting out a scene of smiles
when all is sorrow

(inside)