words are growing silent, now

whispers of a long forgotten
“I love you”
now echoing in the chambers
of winter

an icy kiss to say goodbye
and then...

silence

so loud and deafening it drowns
every other sound into the frozen
depths of the

ocean

another black coffee at 2am

willing myself awake
when I can’t sleep

it is in the whisperings
of the stars

that I hear my name,
spoken softly

not in your voice

no, not in your voice

(anymore)

cosmic birth -
stars aligned
dead flowers that await the Spring

a handful of poppy seeds
scattered - like the ashes
of your dead wife, in her
favourite beauty spot

we are all stardust
and sorrow

holding out for a better
tomorrow

the worst
is whirling round
my mind
I hardly dare
take a breath
in case it is
my last
my heart is
beating out of
time
my pulse quickens
with every blackened
thought
what am I now
but a bag of nerves
fraught and fragile
as crystal
I have written
my life to a
stop

My phantom lover appeared to me

whispering words of love and affection

promises of forever
and “we’re in this together”

but the moon fades, his ghostly face

with it

and I’m left alone again

trying to pluck his memory from my dreams like a flower

it is always a pale comparison
a weak imposition

each night he comes,
and fades at daybreak

and my darling,
I know enough to know
that you’re not real

but this feeling

(this ******* feeling)

white hot
burning a hole
straight through my soul

is as real as the sand
is to the Pyramids

and I cannot break free
from this twisted apparition

it is my life, now
my heart belongs
to a dead man

I wonder what we will have
to show for our love
when we die

(Will we even die together?)

a handful of daisies
that are weeds to some
but never to us

we delighted in turning them
into chains, into planting them
amidst my blonde curls

(They will turn grey soon...)

our love letters
kept in a shoebox
tied tight shut
with a red ribbon

(They are for no one else’s eyes.)

maybe all we will have
is that shaking last kiss
as you place the gun on my temple
and pull

and then turn it on
yourself

lying crumpled together
in old age and misery
debt and alcohol
breathes

but together, my love
absolutely, painfully

together

We watched the dead roses
wither with the winter

our hearts turning cold and pale

our fingers locked together

frozen in time

when they find us

they will think we clung on to
each other till the bitter end

not knowing that the end was just

bitter