I curse the thunder
that tore us apart

I am drowning in the storm

the rain runs cold,
right down to my bones

you used to be my anchor
but now you’re just a ghost

haunting my heart

I’m walking through a dark forest

trees caging me in
with their branches

it is the forest of my heart

beaten and bruised
until there is nothing left

but a small red *****
that anyone can hold in their hand

and destroy further

branches like bars
and trunks like locks

the forest is unforgiving

but I must walk through it
every night

in order to reach daylight

I have shattered the bars of love
that have caged me all my life

each lover burning scars into my heart

their promises of love shining
like stars in my eyes

their gentle words of kindness
like a noose around my neck

and I hung myself with that rope

every time
another came into my life

but no longer will I be confined
by fake words

and fraudulent hearts

I will stand on my own two feet
and thrive like a root planted
in the ground

blooming into something
beautiful

You’re just a body
between me and the stars

an inconvenience
of flesh

a bundle of nerves
that don’t touch me
like lightning
anymore

and I don’t even
miss you

you’re just another
hopeless dreamer

but I don’t share your dreams
now my dreams reach higher

to the stars

In a cage
sits a bird
whose wing
is broken

yet it’s heart
is whole
and it’s
song heavy

with sweet melodies
and soft tones
of longing

It is the song of freedom

that it sings despite
never knowing
and never hoping
to see

The beast within me is hungry
and thirsty for my joy

he feeds off my sadness,
it multiplies inside him

and spreads into my bloodstream

until even the water I drink
is tainted with bitter tears

sadness
sadness
multiplying

there is nothing I can eat or drink
that does not feed the beast

I have tried to drown it
and poison it

but still it survive
indestructible

the beast is feeding off me
until I am skin and bones

and I see no choice but to
learn to love this beast

and make peace with
this ravenous part of me

If you were thunder
I’d listen at my windows
as they shake

and deep down inside
I’d feel that roar
and something
would stir to its call

If you were lightning
I’d stick my chest out to the sky
hoping for you to strike my heart

that bolt reviving an *****
long dead to the world
creating live in me again

when you are a storm
my body rides it out
powerfully in tune
with its eye