It's more unlikely to the others
but you are the one
whose mind is slipping
forgetting
the times we had
that weren't defined in anybody's heads but ours but clearly
the grooves in my mind
are deeper
because you walk past
and on a good day you smile
maybe you think the same
but when you didn't remember
yesterday
i knew this was mostly me doing the missing
and maybe you have a bad memory
but i forget things everyday
and i still remember the words
the conversation
the day of the week
feeling my heart pounding in my fingers as i typed
"hi"
two letters that led to two years that led to one year of
something
and we didn't even talk
we laughed we joked
we never talked once
and that's still how it is
nothing has changed
everything is different
and I don't know how I feel about this because I try really hard
but you do not care
maybe it's me
maybe it's my incredible anxiety
keeping me from smiling in your direction
but you
could smile
too.

A purebred lunatic
that's what the girl in the purple tights
was called.
Laughed at for wearing three braids
because one just didn't seem right.
And ignored because English
didn't come first.
She danced through the halls
walking hurt her feet.
Purebred lunatic, they would say.
Thank you, she would reply
a smile, a pirouette,
and the girl with three braids
would disappear.

dreams swirl, tranquil in my mind
sharply interrupted
denial, snooze
realization
chomp chomp chomp
ziiiiip slam
clink beeep
rattle rattle rattle
STOP REQUESTED
groan, unload.
walk fast
eyes low
12...click...13...click...6... open
slam
walk faster, required smiles
ffft jot jot jot
retain it retain it
gone
who is there? oh, you again.
you again?
you...
again.
swallow
walk, slower.
bonjour, ça va et toi?
memorize
mesmerized
click click
rattle rattle rattle
sigh
unload.
saunter and release.

your roots stretch deeper
than my branches ever will
but we share a trunk

Blood shed
but it wasn't blood
it was something
saltier.

Right place
Wrong time
needed space
      not mine.

couldn't talk
too scared
didn't knock
         I cared.

your eyes
blue, clear
in the skies
     I'm here.

my fault
but i
shed salt
wonder why.

Can't say
everything
please stay
let's sing.