things used to be fun around here
now the walls are full of secrets
birth control and drugs
cheating scandals that might as well be flashed on the front of a paper
friendships severed by the looming promise of anxiety
depression swallows any hope of a hang out
Im sick of my friends being sick

you spray deadly venom in the form of words
in the direction of which I unsteadily stand

with your intention to maim
my solemness fazes you

for though I am writhing in pain
it hides within me
I will give you no such thing as satisfaction
in the way of your tauntingly soulless heart
having license to see the battle going on inside of me

after a series of what I can now see
were clearly one-sided encounters
of genuine flirtation
came the period of silence
from your lying lips
and now you've managed
somehow
to plant those lips on mine
for an awkward and forced moment
that was in no way returned
and have the audacity to muster the sentence
"I still got it"

you can be coy and cocky all in the same breath
I want to suffocate you in these moments
all I know of you; drug use, mixed signals, and your extensive knowledge of how a truck runs
fascinating

so what made you so alluring?

was it the way you sat next to me without even introducing yourself
and grabbed my hand as if we'd known each other already?
or how you would ditch your buddies for a night of partying with me
and we'd hide away sharing stories
sharing lines

whatever was there is now gone
take your drunken kisses elsewhere