I don't want to mess this up
I don't want to be scared
I want this to go smoothly
I don't want to worry about
Why we aren't cuddling
Why you don't have time for me
Why we don't hang out with your friends
Why this is going so fast
Why can't it go any faster
I love you dearly
I love you madly
I love you sweetly
I love you tenderly
I love you entirely
So why am I so paranoid?

My hair is untamed
My skin marred with freckles
Great expanses of alabaster skin
My hips are wide as the sea
My curves are easy to follow
My ***** is generous
And my smile crooked and easy.
Beautiful does not mean perfect
It is my imperfections
That you cannot deny
Or take away from me.

I know why it is called
"the small death".
When you lay spent
In my arms
After your heart
Has ceased its wondrous beat
And syncs with my own.
In these moments
While you are purely mine
I would scarcely believe
You were alive
If not for our heartbeats
Entwined.

First the lust
Then the love
Now the talk
Of marriage
And children?
How about
Grad school?
How about
Career?
What about
My writing?
You are not
Asking for
Sacrifice
And I will
Not offer
It up to you.
Why the rush?

I am dramatic.
I like to overreact.
I like to laugh loudly
I enjoy sobbing
I make big deals out of things
I make grand statements
If you don't like it...?

Go away.

I am tired of making excuses
For your lack of heart
Lack of kindness
Lack of anything resembling friendship.

You used me.
Under the pretense of friendship
You came here
Because it was convenient.

You never mean to hurt feelings
At least that is what you say
But I feel there is a sick thrill
When you know you've caused a rift.

You win
Sweet princess
With your ***** and your ***** clothes
You don't have to remember me.

(I won't remember you either)

Your warm nose
You playing with my hair
Your licks and playful nips
Your soft belly, warm and full
We have a special love
Between a girl and her pup.