I have an irrational fear of bodies of water
When I think of them,
I feel my lungs tightening
My fingers get numb
I see sharks coming towards me
mouths wide open
Its the kind of fear where thinking about it makes your whole body shake and tense up at the time
Your teeth grit together and you just
When I was little I used to swim almost every day, I practically lived in the pool
I wanted to be a mermaid, spend every moment in the water, the ocean was a whole new world
I spent my summers living in the lake
Diving into the water and trying to touch the bottom
I thought heaven would be a utopia of oceans
And we would spend eternity floating
The first thing I did when I went to florida was run to the ocean
I ran till my bare feet were no longer hitting ground but treading water
Swimming in pure bliss and happiness
But that all changed about two summers ago
I was riding a wave runner when My father turned a little too hard
And I was thrown off
It was in that moment that my body forgot how to swim
Sinking in the water light was hard to see
Every single fear that you could have about water flowed into me
I feel my lungs tightening
My fingers get numb
I see sharks coming towards me
mouths wide open
Thrashing in the water till I found the surface I saw my father
Attempting to swim to him, I some how found my way back on the wave runner
I found myself back into the lake house
I’ve never been back in a lake since, not even a body of water
I got nervous the first time I got into a swimming pool at my friends house
I hope that heaven is dry land
And even though I don’t live by the ocean I’m still overwhelmingly terrified of it
And I’ve found that your love, is the ocean.