I have seen your underbelly, so pink,
And have pressed my heart against it.
I have heard the chantings of your soul,
And beneath those lashes, secrets.
Many a striped coat, you so vigorously don,
To warp and distort what we see,
But, I'll sit here and wait,
Because, I've met with Fate,
And have seen the pink underneath.

Welcome to my world, dear friend.
This, now, is ours to share,
To wander through and discover anew,
As a delightfully enlightened pair.

Come sit at Reflection Creek with me,
And gaze into Our eyes.
Learn the water's shimmering secrets,
That unravel so many lies.

We'll dance about this realm, so new,
To feed our hungry hearts,
And have communion with our fathers,
Who live among the stars.

Are you ready to embrace the quaking Earth,
That trembles with a thousand stories,
And dive into a looming sky,
That will cleanse us of our worries?

This is a world within a world,
So bereft of any meaning.
But, this world with which we've become apart,
Is slowly intervening.

Open your eyes, and free yourself,
To achieve great understanding,
To know yourself and know the world,
And nurture your heart's expanding.

Stretch out your arms and greet the world
That will soon become your home.
There's so much here to feed your soul,
And it's free for us to roam.

in the darkest part of my mind,
the dingy loony bus idles.
curiosity has foggied up my gray cells.
leftover bits, orange scented peels,
many questions i've left unanswered,
hide in bleak obscurity.

in the darkest part of my mind,
urges to be the me i’m not,
whisper their desires for freedom,
into the static air,
while lighthearted memories of kisses ago,
crumble under the weight of worry.

in the darkest part of my mind,
I cower in the shadows of intimidation,
over papers due in the morning.
bites and fights drown in an overflow of sweet burning,
with discarded pencils and bottlecaps,
and memories lost in laundry.

in the darkest part of my mind ,
the logical makes no sense.
swirls of confusion, reason,
love and distress,
faded memories seeping through gaping cracks,
hair strands sleeping amid teeth.

in the darkest part of my mind,
chewed and smoked tobacco leaves,
taunt their slaving victims,
as cherry blossoms fall from their branches.
empty words twitter back and forth,
hovering between the breezes.

in the darkest part of my mind,
the heart I adore and adore and love,
sours before I know it.
touches have lost their savour.
words and their meanings duck and hide,
the novel falls open to a new page.

in the darkest part of my mind,
friends laugh their laughs and dance.
mom screams at broken dishes,
dad sings his song his song his… tale,
and I write my soul away.

*02.2010

I am singing my song,
Into the eastern winds,
And I know that She will deliver.

And, I am sending a bird,
With a smile in its song,
To massage your soul in its fever.

Pretty little birdy,
Why won't you sing?
Is not the sun's warmth,
A comfort to your wings?
Have not, you flown,
In the untouched breeze,
Beside gales that dance,
Above the crowns of grand trees?
So small and delicate,
Yet, majestic and strong,
Why won't you share,
Your enchanting, sweet song?
Are not, you free,
From the iron of mankind,
From wounds of deceit,
That arrest and that bind?
Do not, you see life,
Through films of purity,
Peering through the mass of lies,
Into the heart of me?
What creature so harsh,
So greatly incomplete,
Would rob nature of its voice,
And, life of its beat?

Pretty, little birdy,
My life needs your melody.
Make my eyes smile once more.
Please, won't you sing for me?

*04.2008

Chances are, you'll fly right by,
But, lesser chances arrest me.
The chances in your silence outweigh,
The chances in your hug goodbye.

But, the bigger things and realer things,
Keep bringing me back to you,
To accomplish some things and unravel some things,
On my way to being with you.

Catch me in my swift decent,
Into something so lovingly new.
Take my heart and take my hand,
And, I'll gladly belong to you.

*05.2011

In the time when,
     A simple toy with bright lights was enough to amuse me,
     An hour in the bath tub was a day of high-adventure,
     An extra cookie, from the cookie jar, made me feel like something special.
    
     In the time when a nap with mom, in the crook of her arm,
     Was the high point of my day.

During the years that,
     The darkness behind my lids squeezed shut was, somehow, brighter than the darkness around me,
     Mr. Teddy snuggled so tight in my arms gave me a sense of impenetrable protection,
     Drawing my feet way up from the edge of my bed assured me that I would not be dragged away.

     During the years that warm milk and a lullaby were my gold ticket to a peaceful night of sleep.

That era is over.

This year,
     Darkness is darkness, such is the peril that lives within it.
     My once precious Mr. teddy has found a new home, in the back of my dark closet.
     My feet dangle carelessly, over that dreadful edge, after all, drawing them up is pointless.

     This year, warm milk makes my stomach turn,
     And, it takes more than a lullaby to drop my heavy lids.

This time around,
     It's the neon lights of the midnight town that send thrilling shivers up my spine.
     I've traded the great splashes and dunks of bath time for flickering candles and violins.
     An extra treat is a starry-eyed dream, for fear of the guilt to follow.

     A chat with mother is work enough.
     This time, I nap alone.

---

I pray for the minutes,
I counted, until,
I heard dad's keys singing in the lock.

I want for the days,
When I'd anger a toe,
And think my world was falling apart.

I dream of the years,
When I'd be hurt by a friend,
And, the next day, share cupcakes over tea.

I wish for the time,
When everything was simple,
And problems were solved with sweets.

---

Maybe, I could pull Mr. Teddy from my closet's corner,
Warm up a nice, big cup of milk,
Draw up my feet, from the bed's cold edge,
And learn to revel in the darkness around me.

07.2008