Broken lines dangle between
Vital voices at Waterloo.

Slick Rick on one end,
Skips and laughs-
Parading his mangled heart
On his crookedly stolen stick-

Draws circles with it
Around a blinking fire
That has risen,
Around some bush.

Olive sits firmly,
Scissors in hand,
Eyes shut, palms to the skies,
Though,
She skips and laughs sneakily,
Crying out, please, oh Popeye,
Save me!
Having slipped out of the bind,
Rick put her in.

6 Silver bunnies,
With empty pockets,
Sit, twitching
On gold mine expenses,
Looking for those who will come
With precious carrots,
Once word spreads of their
Glinting furs.

cynical cindy,
so wary of love,
trying to salvage her independence,

clutching so tightly to her
sense-of-self,
afraid of slipping
away.

"though -
how happy can a girl be, really,
heralding a man?"

silly cindy,
always needing to know.

just give it a chance,
why don't'cha?

I created a couple on Sims, once.
They were so fantastically in love.
Together they made Gabby,
And a roughling, named Danny.

And, they all lived together,
In Flat 1.

One day, the dad dropped the kids at school,
And, off he went, to work.
I let Taylar, the mum, cheat,
With a stud, on repeat.

Now, I’m just waiting,
‘Cause I know what will come.

Gordy, the dad, who’s still in the dark,
Went to meditate in the park,
There, he saw Taylar,
With Benny, the sailor.

Cue, the planned brawl,
In the street.

Gordy, the dad,
When it was done, had won.
Taylar, crawled back, so sweetly.
But Gordy’s no fool,
He said they were through,
And, sat her junk out on the street.

Taylar the *****,
Went down to the bank,
To clear out Gordy’s account.
But, smart Gordy had listened,
And, cleared out his pension -
Knocked Taylar right off her feet.

So, now, Taylar’s reflecting,
And Gordy’s out flexing,
His muscles he found,
In pastime.

Gabby, so sweet, has started to teach,
While, Danny leads group rock climbs.

Soon enough -

Mum’ll find a new beau,
Dad - a darling, in tow.
Everyone broken -
Now mended.

They all will be fine,
Everything works, in due time,
By the point, at which the story has ended.

let's talk about love
and how it ***** your **** up
while you sip on its elixir
like it's doing
the most
wonderful thing in
the world
for you -

how it thrusts you
into the darkest places
you've ever known
to feel **** you
really feel

but
not
really
at all -

let's talk about how
beautiful it makes the world
when it does you
right
and how dark it can get
so fast -

or

how it can put
your entire
life
on fast
forward
or
set it on
a blissful
pause
or
bring it
to a
screeching--

STOP.

i've gotten my hands
plenty *****
in this game -
thinkin' i wouldn't
need gloves
to play

but
****'s dirtier than money
though
sweeter than honey...

so i sip
once more -

in lieu of
the learned
and because
of
the learned -

i'm downin' that elixir
until i'm ****** over
silly
because what
has been
learned
has been
learned
hard
& good:

drunken love
is the
only way
to love.

you're an anagram in my heart
and i don't care

as long as
you love me
tomorrow,

you ******.

i still got a glass full of wine
and a bundle of hope
towards
Marley's flames
being
just
hot enough

to
light
your ***
on fire.

and if that don't bring you
back to life

looks like
Merlot & I
are enjoying
a night
on the town.

who's rockin' the **** boat
this time around?

don't care.

i'm lost in the waves
of you rockin' my ocean -

causing that
commotion
of devotion
that i love so much -

the way you
harvest the flow
and demand
its cresting
is the rest
of why
i'll even be back
in the morning.

we got that
ebb & flow
action
reaction -
fantastic

then ****.
the split -
again?

shh...baby, be quiet

you know you love me
more than
any *******
either of us could
ever
dream to concoct.

so just tear it up
like i know you want to -

all that *******,
i mean.


unless.

you mean.

otherwise...?


i'm your fancy baby
waiting at the center of the night

to
bang around
town

or in bed
instead

wherever your head's
at daddy,

i'm there.

the timing's always right
this time -

i promise.

so let's endeavor
to do this
together
forever

or
whenever
comes after
that.

In the world upstairs
Are walls as veils,
Balleting in
Inner winds.

Shadows criss-cross
The songs
That trudge
From throngs
Of masses
Running around,
In chaos
That sneaks over -
Guised in cloaks
That rival its
Counterpart.

"I wish I wasn't obsessed with words,"
He says.

"Oh, me too!
… except, not really,"
I reply.

"You see, I have kinda, sorta, possibly, maybe,
(Completely and so very utterly)
Developed this odd sort of weird little “thing” for words.

Words, for me, are kinda like that guy that drives you up the walls -
You’re crazy about him.

He’s in every thought that creeps into your mind.

Every move he makes,
You want to pop into your mouth
And roll around for a bit,
Because you know it must taste somethin’ delicious.

But, you can’t **** on it too hard,
Because you want it to melt
So, so very slowly,
As to not disappear too quickly.

He’s that guy that does you somethin’ silly!

Makes you smile so hard
And do things with your body
That make absolutely no sense -

But, only because he makes you feel so good
That you haven’t a danglin' clue
On what to do with yourself.

He’s that guy that makes you,
Every once in awhile,
Lose sight of things important.

That guy that’s not altogether good for you,
But, you simply can not get enough.

--

So, I mean, yeah.
Sometimes, logic says,

If you’d just break up with words,
You could get a whole bunch more of your junk done,
Rather than dwelling on every single thing he does.

But, my heart,
Trusting my logic,
Replies, adamantly, saying,

*Yah - but, I don’t think I can.

I like you a lot.
I know, but I don't like you.
I like you a lot.
I know, but I don't like you.
I like you a lot.
I know, but I don't like you.
I like you a lot.
I know, but I don't like you.

I like you a lot.
*I know, and I like you too.

It's killin' me,

the way you always
heed my silent becks
to the cat's cradle
for the dim-dusked
shimmyings we do,

for the middle of the courts
hopscotchin' we improv
in the
catacorner criss-crosses
we continue to let
splash
in the middle of our
bashing pool.

stakes are
brimstoned
high
this time-

higher than the dizzy chicks
with flower magic
stick-on things
not really covering their ******* -

their faith's got them
grinning down
proudly
to the matrix hubbub below,
from the drooping shoulders
of their guy bits
in matching flowers

('cause we're all one here
yeah? - yeah!).

tonka tricks
litterin' my walkway -
slinkin' around,
tryna play on with
the big cats -

instead,

just trippin' up my
flutter game -

chill out.

i mean,

i'm not complainin'
'bout the mess your
charcoal lashes keep
leavin'
after payin their
naughty boy dues
to them round things
just one step down -
makin' love to
the apples bobbin'
in cheeky
conversation.

i've kinda got this
cheshire thing goin' on -
the way my smile swells
too slowly for you -
showin' off whiffs of
those secret things

the ones i only hold onto to
to keep rattlin' your cage
with the big toys
i keep tellin' you
you can't have.

but
you keep
swimmin' in that pool
of excessive *****
traps
thinkin' there's a way
to ****** the magic
carpet from beneath my
bottom,

believing some dumbly
that your charcoal
is the only fire starter i'll ever want
markin' up my agenda.

you're screamin' a bit too loud
now, Cubby -
readin' to me the words
i can't see written across
my face.

I can't see 'em
without a mirror,
though i can feel the letters
being etched into my skin
with every flipped card
i wasn't
necessarily
tryin' to flip.

but, honey
i got cosmic dust
stored in my fingertips

a special
spunky mix
i like to throw down on
in the kitchen with
the sandman's concoctions -

plan A and plan B
it's a fight just to see in -
need to be prepared
for whatever is comin'.

though you ain't snatched
the rug yet,
i'm lollygaggin' on the
tip of the edge

my carpet's doin this
rufflin' thing -
and i'm slippin'.

you got me
colonizin' your corduroys
draggin' my stirred and ragged heart
behind me -
too sturdy and ambitious
in its wild-hearted
persistence.

gonna bust open
this fruit bloom, here
if it takes me all day
and all night.

I am
an ant,
looking for salvation
in big places.

drip me dry
from all these
carnal cases
of
spiritual
expansion
or
personal growth
or
whatever
whatever
you wanna
call it
this time
you simply
can't hide

the truth.

i'm exasperated-

tell me
what your
truth
sounds like
'cause
i keep on
confusin' it
with
what i call
truth

and, **** ain't
linin' up
right.

deliver us from
evil
in manner
and in
thought -

deliver
me
from
*****
deliveries.

My dreams are dreams of black and white.

I dream of the late Cool Hand Luke,
And Big Daddy in the rain.
I dream of Hepburn, where it's hot,
Of Skelton upon his stage.

I dream of Jeannie,
Of Lucy's man,
Of Hitchcock's crazed suspense,

And of my freckled friend, named Opie,
Relaxing with Papa Griffith.

Jethro swings from chandeliers,
As daddy fends off fiends.
Granny ***** that little hand,
Signaling the end.

My cup runneth over.

Let me pour into your chalice and watch it spill into my soul.
A red, red wine, waxed old so quickly.

Give me this day and forever.

*06.2011

Worn rows of gowns
Turn old,
Cluttered in the
Closet.

screamin' red
snowball hat
clashin' so
loudly
with my
fall of
that year's
new
hand-me-over
jeans.

my bike was fast.

silver metal
peekin' out
from beneath
the
shimmering white
& pink
chipping
paint job
my uncle
had given me
when
baby & i'd
turned 7.

it was sleek
i was meek -

good riddance.

Are my scars saying words,
Too frankly to you?

What of my wounds,
That have yet to heal?

Is my courage too loud,
For you, Sir Proud -

Am I too brokenly real?

I ain't afraid to tell the world,
That you make me,
What I hate most.

That the jellybean drops,
Slippin' from your lips,
Spread like,

Dollops -
Sweet butter,
On toast.

Can't hide my sticky fingers -
Drippin' your,
Candy residue.

Though, I plan to make,
The best of it,
Before the moon is new.

My sternest strategies,
'neath the night's eyes,
Light my ***** little schemin',

My plot to watch,
Your every step,
Before the moment,
That I steal you.

--

I've been eatin' jellies,
Since I was little -
Today, I've tasted so many,

But, the ones that slip,
(And, sometimes, skip)
From that head,  

Drive my thoughts,
Out, much,
Too selfishly.

How do you make your triangular squares,
Spin into yellow circles?

First they were blue,
And, before I knew,
It, they were fading into pinks,
Unglued.

I've tussled with logic,
Inside of my pocket,
Picking you slowly apart.

Now, I've given in,
That's it - You win.

Poetic - Your soul is an art.

Ain't a soul of us, without dark spots.*

Not lacking
In don't's
That have been done,

In rues
Of arson -
Like
Matters

That, simply,
Will not go
Away.

--

Today,
I asked
A sweet birdy -

Just once-

If he would
Sing
'Til my
Dumb heavings
Shut up.

To hear how I
So needed
Him to say
Something beaming -

Something
That would melt ice
That had begun
Its branding -  

Ignorant,
It went on,
Pecking rocks
At my toes.

So, I stapled
My bad day
To its back.

Head hot, in
Black heat,
Quick,
Shufflings of feet,
Sent the birdy
On its
Forced agenda.

Then, I saw
That sweet birdy
Get snatched,
By a beast

Thrice rabid,

On its way
To attempt such a feat.

Dry sickles
Burned my throat -
Some ugly and sad -

With broad cries
That never met
Words.

Though,

The sickles rose far,
Burned that ice
Into scars -

So, I guess,
The bird did away
With my blizzard.

I know the door you're
Speaking of,

And you're right.
It is
Shut -

Firmly
Tight.


Love seeps through,
Overtaking my view,
Breathing promises
of
No looks back.

While

Red emotion
Slips through,
Obscuring my view,
With such ease,
Spilling
Right through the
Cracks.


I feel gusts of
You,
Whisping bits of me to

The spaces you wish
We'd go -

Though it's the
Heavier parts
That can't quite start

Flying -

Afraid
Of the
Multiplous

Ways to go.

--

It's Me

That gets
Left behind.

i've been craving
the sensation
of
satiation
in being

who i am
makes lesser sense
with each

overturned

rock
that leads to
an
epidemic

of revelations
and patience
in my wait for
illumination

on topics
i didn't even know
were relevant.

each endeavor
i meet
quietly
quaking
with
significance -

waiting
for it all
to be
realized,

each person
a character
vital
to an end
brooding
in
gestation.

i am a queen.
a seductress.
a coyote in the darkness.

a healer.
a guide.

a friend.

i am a person
unaffected
by the world
of
labels,

living within
this all
but
without.

--

it's a charming game,
a sweet, sweet dream,
this life thing,
gifted to us.

takin' it
one step
at a time
with each
step
more alive,

and
to think,

yesterday
i spent sleeping

through it
all.

Daddy asked me one muggy day,
If I wanted to ride the ell again.

My attention caught the swings, for a bit,
Before turning to him and saying,

“I ain’t goin’ back to the city, Daddy,
To see Jerry or nobody,

‘Cause the city snatches my breath away,
And not in the sweet way neither.

The buildings make me feel so lost,
And, I’m lost ‘nough, as it is.

The people tell me my smile’s too warm,
For a place that eats up chills.

Can’t I stay here in your lap, forever,
And pretend to be unaware?

Listenin’ to talk of crime afar,
Glad that we’re not there?”

Daddy held my hand and stroked my hair,
‘Til it seemed as if hours flew by.

Then, he kissed, so softly, my frizzy hair,
And said, “At some point, you need to fly.”

She pushed her cart so frankly,
Eyes straight forward -
Never sidecast,

Nor down to the tray
Showing a splendid array
Of treats
I knew
Were mine.

But then that woman
Went blinking mad!
Racin' her goodie cart
Much too fast,

Rudely ahead,
At things I
Yet
Had said -
Her gown
Screaming

A ****** red.

--

Hair yanked
My eyes
Down -
The drone had stolen my gown!

Rattling wheels
Still forging ahead -

She had given me her
Flute and her
Tongue-tied suit,

(The suit that I knew
Gave them
Control over you),

Her wolf eyes
Wide,
And dead.

My filed down nails
Grew into claws,
Clenching my empty cup,

"I did not drink it!"
"I will not drink it!"

Then the cup was filled back up.

That woman stood still
In front of me -
Hands tied down to her sides,

As she silently mouthed her
Starch-white song,

"There's nowhere
You can hide."

I hurled my cup
With that bitter water
At her blaringly
Condemning
Face,

"I will not eat
Your grinning sweets!
You won't keep me
In this place!"

--

Nuts and bolts
Flying and Floating -
Stinging a rip
In time,

Punctuation
Chasing my words,
In haste -

But,
No trace of her
Could I find.

--

Too much parepin in my water.

i'm living in the gist
of a
cold shiver,

wondering,
"what, why, and for how long?"

is it really for forever,
as the burning
insisted
before?

or is the tyrannous void,
in some muscle somewhere,
the truth
i should
remember?

count your blessings,
you foolish girl.

diamonds aren't always
found
on this ruff side of
town.

--

solar eclipse,
lunar harvest,
my soul is ripened
for the
taking.

It doesn't take a
shrink
to tell me that
yelling
*******
isn't exactly
the best way
to let you know

i need you.

and my aunt Tay -
she coulda
kept her say
'cuz i already
know
that my fists kept
close(d)
is what's
keeping me
from
you

giving me

what
i need

annnd

beating them
against your
chest
probably
doesn't tell you
too simply
to hold
me

even
tighter -

listen,

i have
way too many
*****
to give
to be
giving them all
to you

poor you.

i know.

and it all
drives me so nutty
that you
my baby got
stuck
in this heart
of putty
ive got
you
sputty-

babblin' about
how you
want to keep on
doing this

forever.
and ever?


I love you.

A degree above that happiness
That makes you want to
Squirm about, for-
What seems-

No
Apparent

Reason.

I kept saying,
That I was finished.

But, then I'd
Forget
To close the bag,
Before turning my attention
Elsewhere.

Only to
Look back,
Five minutes later,
And notice
The bag still open.


"Hmm..
Well, maybe,
One chip more..."

I kept saying,
That I was finished.

But, then I'd
Forget
To close the bag,
Before turning my attention
Elsewhere.

Only to
Look back,
Five minutes later,
And notice
The bag still open.


"Hmm..
Well, maybe,
One chip more..."

I haven't an empty,
Dead-weight thought
For racing cracks
Of yesterday -

Cracks that split
Faster than crooks

Spinning in
Red-paced,
Screaming lights,

--

Times ago,
Are times I know,
Only in now's
That never end,

And times to come
Are simply from
Times, the same as
Now and Then,

So, when I spend
Hours within
The greenest greens,

Glowing near
Bashing violets,

Or dance with
The street,
Feet locked in repeat -
Communion
With dirt red brick,

You'll know why these things,
Tickle my wings,
And why I choose

Now,

As my
Sweetly,

Forever.

I don't want to be a speck in this ocean of humanity.
I don't want my words to be so small and obscure that even the keenest ear, still, cannot hear.
I don't want to be tossed and kicked and shoved about, like the speck I fear I am.
The speck that floats & sweeps and glides & sighs - the speck that will never be examined.

I breathe.
I live.
I mean.
I am.

I don't want to be invisible.

---

The world is one big bustle after another - people pushing and shoving, only to sleep and repeat?

I am the one you bumped into, in a race to catch the nooner to downtown Detroit.
I am the girl you stumbled past, in your rush to catch another cab.

I am the flower ******* McKenzie who sold you more marigolds.
The waitress at PJ's who asked, "More cream?"
The cashier at Aldi's who bagged your Arizona.

I am that ticket taker at Cinemark who gave you your stub and genuinely hoped you would enjoy your movie.

I am the girl you're seated by, right now.
This instant.

So close, you can hear her soft breaths;
So close, you can nearly smell her perfume;
So close, and still...
You stand.

You gather your things, get off the train, and run off to catch another, what?
Bus? Plane? Cab?

You're gone.
And, I'm here.
And, I'm still the girl;

The girl who might have been your soulmate.
But, you traded me for 15 minutes of silence and a bed you'd sleep in alone.

---

I don't want to be a speck in this ocean that is your world.
I want to be a boulder.

I want to mean something,
And be something,
And exist to you.

So, STOP.
I'm here.


"Hello."

Welcome to my world, dear friend.
This, now, is ours to share,
To wander through and discover anew,
As a delightfully enlightened pair.

Come sit at Reflection Creek with me,
And gaze into Our eyes.
Learn the water's shimmering secrets,
That unravel so many lies.

We'll dance about this realm, so new,
To feed our hungry hearts,
And have communion with our fathers,
Who live among the stars.

Are you ready to embrace the quaking Earth,
That trembles with a thousand stories,
And dive into a looming sky,
That will cleanse us of our worries?

This is a world within a world,
So bereft of any meaning.
But, this world with which we've become apart,
Is slowly intervening.

Open your eyes, and free yourself,
To achieve great understanding,
To know yourself and know the world,
And nurture your heart's expanding.

Stretch out your arms and greet the world
That will soon become your home.
There's so much here to feed your soul,
And it's free for us to roam.

Do you remember when the universe told you my fingers were magic?*

I do.
I thought it funny of Him,

To do it in such a small way.
In a way so silly,
No one would remember,
My secret,

The universe had spilled.

I, sometimes, think of,
All of the people,
Who could answer,
"Is there life after death?"

I get jealous, because,
There, once, were some,
Who - now -
Have such an answer.

But, then I remember those people are dead,
And, how that may actually ****.

I laid nose-to-nose, in tall, old grasses, with a spirited coyote, some nights ago.
He said to me, with lips unparted and low, shiny eyes - to listen.

Hesitantly, I inched forward and nudged that coyote with my face, prodding him for something more.

But, nothing came.
He simply stared back at me, unblinkingly.

“I listen!”
I shouted with a heart on fire.
“I listen more than anyone I know!”

The coyote continued his staring game, quieting my bosomed flames.
Stubborn - they erupted, something ugly, from the valley, into the mountaintop.
Spilling from eyes, in the mountainside, I screamed back into his so loud,
The mountain ached from its shut in echo.

Patient " the coyote waited.
So, I stopped.

Somehow surprised, I found that, after the flames subsided into greys of ashes, in silence, I had begun to listen.
That coyote’s eyes were urging eyes, unmoving " unrelenting.

Obedient, I drew forth my worn, careful bag out and placed it, gently, in the dirt between us.
The coyote snatched it, in the grain between our breaths, and held it between clenched teeth.

I glared at him with challenging eyes " he stared back at me, just the same.
I reached out to grab it, but halfway there, I heard the coyote command me,

“Stop.”

The coyote lay there, my ashes raging about loudly " still silent, my bag between his teeth.
As the ashes settled, his glaring eyes mellowed, and I watched as he gobbled it up.

--

A crow cawed somewhere.
The full moon shone down approvingly.

My soul sighed once.
My body followed.




The coyote slept -
I bowed my head in silence.

I once saw the edge of time flip over,
Into the middle of two days ago.

So, I sat right through it,
Because, I already knew it -

Realized opportunities,
Lost in the cosmos.

--

Just now,

I saw the beginning,
Of time flip over,
Into our section of the universe,

How many years,
Do you think disappeared,
Or doubled,

In this single discourse?

Surely these surly bits
Must be burrs caught up in my
Makeup -

Making up reasons for
Why my spit was accidental.

I done been through a
Rough patch or two -
Crawling with these
Thorns in my knees
Across funky plateaus
That poke their chests out
In their scouts
For sunnier flora.

Though,
I assume their search
Didn't go over so well.

'cause these scabbings won't heal
Like I want them to,
Buried under gobs of
Ointment
That was supposed to take care of it

(And
One more bandage
Just in case).

I'm just moseying on through,
With my feelers out,
Making sure you're someone
I have to know.

In and on my way
Somewhere
In this crazy field,
Waiting for sunflowers
To bless my prayers
While I continue to
Make room for myself to
Slip past
Without being noticed.

I'm smiling so hard
To keep the soft-hearted
At bay -
Trying to avoid being forced
Into pinpoint relations
With clueless drifters
Who refuse to stay on their side.

They only mean well -
I know this,
I do.

But, the simple has yet to escape me.

Send your
Sympathies
To the weak ones,

Roleplaying
Alongside the meek,

For these are the creed
Who,
Without giving heed,

Deliver their lives
To bliss.

Sweet, baby's
Breath,

Untainted,
And so pure.

A satin soft
Scent, that sounds
Sweetly
Reminiscent of
How then
Thoughts
Tumbled

Freely

Into the others.

Passively rummaging
Through my old
Collection of Sighs
For all the
Mutely, flickering
Instances in which
I
Catered
Poorly
to the
In between.

As much as I would
Like,
There's no
Teleporting
Through
Life,

There's no
Jumping
From this level
To that.

Instead,
I curl coyly
About,
In the
Slowly sweetening
Nuances
Of
Time

And sleep
Soundly
in

What's to
Come.

Cummerbunds & cuff links,
Top hats & Armani.
P’s and Q’s donning shining shoes,
Seem to dance beneath your feet.

*06.2011

Fancy cameras and tennis nets,
Corridors so long and winding -

Remind me why we’ve gone so far,
From our time spent lost and searching.

*Regret felt prematurely is regret potentially avoided.
06.2011

Languid speech of sallow souls
Open your hearts & speak!

*06.2011

Shards and candlewax,
ache in my belly,

I am
lost in the looks
of the
transient.

i can hear your hesitant silence
louder than an
atom bomb

and the sliverous little
glances
that weave between the
minds

i counted them
once before

when the wind
blew out your
lashes,

when your
fumbly words
and jumpy fingers
gave away
all
your secrets.

show me the string
that unravels the thing
ive been
hunting all day
in search for -

the mirror in the rain
that collects all the pain
for gain
that
ive been waiting
my life
for.

'bunch of student
pollutants,
faces sooted
in black,
fingers
grimey and sticky,
snatching the little
i got.

all ive ever wanted
has been a
simple enough dream:

to be happy

and sappy
with my lover,
my cream,
to play my part
and finish out
what i
started,

to exist on this earth -
serene

but there's this itch
i can't get
to succumb to a
verdict.

this is it.

are you coming
or going?

I've heard the moon whisper,
On several occasions -
Stories and things,
That tell what life will bring,

And what to bring to it.

At dusk, the moon laughs,
With me, in the garden-
We hold hands,
And share our secrets.

The moon tells me who,
I should cling to,
And, I, how the clinging did fare.

We kiss and run after,
The stars - though, I'm shackled to,
The earth, with too much to care,
For.

I have seen your underbelly, so pink,
And have pressed my heart against it.
I have heard the chantings of your soul,
And beneath those lashes, secrets.
Many a striped coat, you so vigorously don,
To warp and distort what we see,
But, I'll sit here and wait,
Because, I've met with Fate,
And have seen the pink underneath.

I can't even count
how many times
the sun has done
its shining thing
without me,

pouring down
its sunny rain
on my big ol'
black parade.

there's this weird dynamic
that tends to occur
when my lesser-than-vibrant
fanfare's in town,

with all its subtly pompous
pomply pomp  
blaming it all on
circumstance.

"Let's all gather 'round
this *****'s back
and lick the jelly
right off!"

(please!)

don't ask what my
'a little too loose'
head off my neck
is doing

peeking
wishfully

out from the darkness

rollin' around the p's in my mind

pathetically
snatching at my
poor, poor
soul -

a pity party
thrown for
one.

it's quite funny
really
how often
i forget
how silly black
looks

when it's sunny.

there's something about
letting a person speak
when there's really
nothing
to say
at all,

the pressure placed
becoming so overwhelming
that their heart
and gut
start spewing from
the poor thing's
opened
pores.

imagine the feeling
you experience
thinking of one's
innards doing a thing
like
that thing -

it's a rather
awkward scene
to take in.

--

I haven't a direction
that i'm looking to go in
specifically,
but i believe if i
take two lefts
and remind you

...

and another left
to bring us
back to

that girl who keeps
speaking
and
with every line
is
speaking
for all to
hear.

Now,
you know my secrets.

And, this bit of line,
Here,
Tells me why your heart’s
Achings pour out
So thickly
In your sighs-

Why you paint on
Boisterous smiles,
To draw away from
Your telling eyes.

My fingertips feeling,

The way the bowl dips,
Deeply,
Full of somethings
Too heavy,
Find the reasons
You can’t fall prey
To those who don't say,
But reveal,

With rottenly
Itching fingers,

&

Why I can't do away with
Those maddening strokes,
That have melted into
Cracks in marble.

You've so many
Drooping wilts,
On a wiltingly drooping line,

Dripping
Downward
In their gentle slopes,

Reminding me
To be gentle
In the way that I
Love you
In ashen days.

Though,

These three little x's,
Snickering beneath your bowl,
Tell me,

You've probably been
Reading me,
In opaquely mirrored ways,

Peering from your bowl,
All along.

Half-breed kitty cat,
Mewing through the gate,
"Too few marbles in your bag,
To paw over this way?

I ain't got no mites in my fur,
Just spots my mama gave me.
We even moved into this yard,
And out that ***** alley.

Excuse my rasp,
From the sharp, sharp glass,
That stuck in my throat last summer.

As, a kind ol' woman took it out for me,
But, left a piece - though, I forgive her.

I promise I'll be fair,
If I can play,
And paw at your pretty marbles.

I'm a kitty cat too,
Like the lot of you,

Just as kitty,
And, just as able."

---

"Oh, I'm not allowed,
To even join the crowd,
'cause my fur ain't as yellow as yours?

Well, I'm a kitty cat queen -
Know what I mean?
This world will open up,
Better doors."

you're not half bad
at your candlewick blossom snuffing -

got your braggart game up loud
in your repetitive silence
beaming at the doting strange phoenixes
darting in between your
bending fingers,

snatching up my flames
in their return to their
static progress on
life skills that are lingering
far too long
in the forging stage.

baby, baby
please -

tell me those aren't
your voices
slithering up the tall
columns of echoes,
wailing out
overzealous,
too pompous
orations.

nevermind -

my mind's pretending
to sleep somewhere marvellous
in this mind-field
of
the littlest
pink *******,

trying to act like
i don't suddenly feel
as if
the tomorrow
up next
will be bringing
a different star.

so i just sit here -

pointing my toes at occurrences
that i really wish had've gone down
a whole lot more
differently,

praying that
by some miracle,
tossing a bit of dust
from my careful bag

(paired with the experimental
levitational practices
i keep doing in my free time)

will somehow
make room
for all these
eggshells you won't stop
throwing onto the floor.

too many have found me
playing patty-cake
under that possessed streetlamp
down Hardy,
the one that always seems to flicker
when i walk by -

snatching back its potency
just long enough
to highlight the
unsolicited red apple ritual
happening in my
cheekbones.

i've got a game to catch.

not trying to be the dawdling girl,
throwing all of her hopes
into the air,
willing the destined one
to be something that will
cradle us both.

you gotta be on this
wick snuffing trip
searching for something a little more than
a ****-tossing buddy.

better get a pack of matches
and try to beat me to it,
'cause i'm putting up my fire-red can

and the light's gonna follow me out.

I crept up to the rocking chair
Perched beside my bedroom door,
Pressed my ear up to the wood
Waiting for daddy's snores,

Silence in heaps,
Between discounted sheep,
Blared into the darkness,

Until, an eye-squeezing roar
Shook the entire first floor,
Following my tiptoes across the carpet.

Down the hall and to the left
And quickly up the stairs

(Swiftly, I went
In my flighty ascent -
Should goblins follow,
Me - unawares),

I burst into the attic
Heart naively in panic -
Back evened with the sturdy door,

The attic, at last!
The window ahead,
And beyond it,
I could only imagine.

--

Daddy told me once,
From behind billows of smoke,
That the more I dreamt
The more things awoke,

I dreamt of a dragon
In bed that night,
So, with the stars, up high
Should be a dragon in flight,

I threw open the curtains,
Soul, a wish-filled flagon,
Breath held tight
To behold my...lizard?

--

An itty bitty
Teeny weeny
Green,

(and somewhat, brownish)

Thing,

Crawled across
My window sill
Lacking all his
Dragon things,

His dragon hue,
And dragon size,
Everything
Dragon-wise,

I plopped down to
The floor beneath
The window,
And I took a seat,

I watched that little
Dragonette -
Slowly trying
To just forget,

The dragon I had come to see
Hadn't cared enough to come see me,

Then that lizard did a crazy thing -
Popped up his head -
Showin' a big pink thing!

I wasn't sure what sounds lizards made
So, I moved up close
('cause I wasn't afraid!)

Eye to eye,
I leaned in close,
Then that thing jumped forward
And bit my nose!

...

*I'm pretty sure he liked me.