Remember when
the world wasn’t so cold
and I could find warmth in your arms?

Remember when
you used to love me
and I felt like anything was possible?

Remember when
you wrapped me in your warm embrace
and you whispered the sweetest things in my ear?

Remember when
you said it could last forever
and I believed every word you ever said?

Remember when
you cared or at least pretended
and I fell for all your best tricks?

Remember when
everyone warned me against you
and I denied every claim?

Remember when
I stood beside you
and I trusted you one hundred percent?

Well, now I know
those days are gone
and now I know
that I’ll never feel your touch again.

You never really cared, did you?
You never really meant the things you said.

And every time
I looked in your deep brown eyes
I was reminded of those times
we were all wrapped up in each other
and all I know now
is my memories of the past.

There is no trust.
There is no love.
You never could prove your worth.

You turned out just like everyone said.
You broke my heart,
and you barely even blinked an eye.

You moved on so fast,
she fell for your lies.
I guarantee you broke her heart.

Remember when
I fell hard, head over heels, for you
and you caught, just waited to drop me when she came?

Remember when
I called you late that night
and I was crying, it was bad?

Remember when
we went to the beach,
and the sun was shining down?

Remember when
you smiled at me
and I couldn’t keep steady?

Your kiss knocked me off my feet,
your touch sent shocks through me,
with you everything just felt so… right.

Remember when…
Everything was okay
and I wasn’t falling apart?

You caused me to fall apart…

You broke me beyond repair…
yes, you broke my heart.

You knew all my firsts,
you knew all my secrets
even the reasons for all my scars,
inside and out…

Remember when?



xoxo

we lay together,
surrounded in silence,
an uncomfortable gloom.

i lose the battle,
"flesh on flesh...
wounds bleed fresh."

alone with you beside me,
"every inch of my tar black soul,"
a fake bled into a dry life.

A purr awakens me,
urges me to write,
words haunt me and
i can't get them out.

i'm stuck in this limbo
wishing i had something
a little stronger than
a bit of sweet iced tea.

"he loves me with every beat,"
of a straightedge heart
and i thought
we could be happy.

a slice of life,
a pit of sorrow,
a hell in my mind.

sleeping and worrying.
hoping that the world will just spill out?
that might be awhile.

i love you.



xoxo

the look in your eyes,
it haunts me at times,
and the time you lied.

oh, that kills me every time,
and how I saw you from then on,
you **** me every time.

your laughter echoes, reverberates.

the sound is hypnotic, dizzying,
the sound kills me every time.

the haunting eyes that shatter my soul,
and stalk my heart when I close my eyes.

the eyes of the only person,
who could hurt me as deep,
who could literally **** me,
inside and out, rip me apart.

you know who you are.
and you know what you caused,
because you’ve done it a million times,
it’s what you do, it’s what you’ve done,
it’s how you break our hearts.

it’s how the pain stays,
and how the light fades,
from our eyes as you say goodbye…
that last final time.

and we never want to see your face again,
because the act of perfidiousness,
stung so deep, and throughly,
we never forget.

we are sagacious, now.
your eyes tought us the lesson.

we will never trust in eyes,
what should be felt with hearts,
and we will be skeptical,
once again, of the truth.

you brought us pain, agony.
now, your eyes are forgotten,
and our eyes are open.

and we are healing.
we are seeing with new eyes,
the world of possibility.

and we are awaiting the chance,
to live life again, as ourselves.

we are ready to let the walls down.
we are ready to survive,
we are ready to love again.

but, we do it cautiously,
because when we hear a line,
we see your eyes in our mind,
and we remember the time you said the same.

we laugh and say no thanks,
because your eyes are in our mind.

goodbye to the tear stained memories.
now they can be archived as
lessons that we learned.

and we can look into the eyes of our true love one day.
and we will see,
that you lead us here.

now.
goodbyes, can be healthy.


xoxo

hiding behind the words
on a white screen
is a person

a person who has always
died
on the inside

she has died on the outside
too

for those she loved
and those who didn't
really ever deserve it

she always hid from the truth
and threw her wall up
when times got hard

'just another brick in the wall'
she tells herself
as an excuse


xoxo

she fancies herself a princess
but her prince is running a tad late
no white rabbit to keep him on track

she sits in her tower and waits
for the prince shows up to rescue her.
but no one ever comes

her anticipation is desperate
her heart is shattering  
the story unfolds

she scrubs her arms
bleeding into the bathroom sink
are dark ink stains.

her lyrics scrawled across her arms
no better way to keep sanity
than to lose your mind

don’t need a pen and paper
to write my story down
just give me blood and tears

she whispers,
"i doubt he even knows my name"



xoxo

the rain storms down
the angry words fall out
and we all start to drown

fighting for our breath
and we can’t contain
what we feel anymore

to see through her eyes
would be more than a punishment
as we wade through the waves of life

depression bashes into me
and I fight this sea repeatedly
staying afloat in treacherous sin

Faking one more smile
pushing emotion aside
just long enough to forget

and never long enough
to not feel regret

i miss the warmth of you
beside me, breathing me in
i fight desperately for one more chance

to feel the way you
made me feel

the feeling was flying


falling crying dying life love floating elation


i can’t live anymore

I’m already dead.



xoxo

officially, the title resembles
the power that makes me tremble
love grows quickly

we hide together
in plain sight
my heart is mended

though i hurt you
i lied and we lie
together in bed

guilt tears at me
with sharp teeth
and glittering eyes

betrayal flaunts
its hold over me
it teases and ridicules

i haven't hurt you yet
and we both know
to our cores

you're hungry
for love
you fall


xoxo