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EJ Aghassi Jun 2014
there is this car-

you know
4 wheels, 2 doors
Mercedes maybe?

and every time
I pass it by
I look twice

I think twice

and I know it
couldn't be you

But I've adopted
this new optimism
& new turbulence

maybe the world is magic
and the eastern plane true

there's fraction of chance
in a passing glance
my eyes will be reflecting you

maybe I'll see you again
and maybe I'm meant to be happy

perhaps this smile is genuine

And so, perhaps,
that is in fact your car

and maybe, in fact,
there is a pull between our hearts
EJ Aghassi Jun 2014
i am forcing this

but
i am not ashamed

what you did
was what you do

but you don't realize
the weight
that comes

with the way you
opened up and all

blue has remerged
blue is what i see
blue eyes i know
you've been looking
for me

chemicals in the air
reactions of you
the memories seep down
these empty hallways now

doors closed
rooms empty
bed big
and cold

mind circling
head heavy
body shivering
soul sold

i'll sleep on nails
on splintered floors
whatever you will

i don't mind

my mind is no more

i am the incarnation of desire

and the mouth
the fingers
that say too much

what matters is
what is what matters

what's true is true

you don't have to sleep
alone tonight

if you don't want to
EJ Aghassi Jun 2014
I shouldn't drink this much

and I was so certain
I felt so sure

I thought you could see me
I thought you could actually understand

I felt you
I really did

You looked into my eyes and I looked
into
Y O U

I felt your heart

I saw your dreams

your aspirations

And there is nothing

not a thing

I want more,
than the privilege of your smile

the charity of your time

I was so sure
so convinced

and here I am near tears
completely unable
to forgive myself

here I am
here I am
and you are so
far away

here I am
hear me
listen

I've ruined myself

i'm rubble for you, dear

my eyes burn
A life spurned

I will never be the same

never again, never again

Despite the effort,
&
attention

Alleyways &the;
Obscure,
you're as close to home as ever

but
a miscommunication
is all I'll ever be
EJ Aghassi Jun 2014
ask
ask me how it feels to be helpless

living, dying, hopelessly reckless

i won't fight
i won't fight

your embrace
will be my end tonight
EJ Aghassi Jun 2014
pretty thing
I've met stupider
Don't worry about it

Baby doll
I see only you
Don't worry about it

Sweetheart
I'm happiest
when I'm sad

darling
I don't know
any better
EJ Aghassi Jun 2014
and just like that
it all came back
but it didn't hurt-
I was smiling, in fact

naivety
wishes and dreams

longing and lust
blind faith and trust

nature bleeding colors
incredible warmth

and still that
warmth of another

sent shivers
in sorts

though troubled
mind hardened

though heart
now near stone

sometimes I smile
when I am alone

it all sometimes
floods

avalanches
fall

mudslides &
quicksand

perilous waters
& all

just like that it
comes back

sometimes
I'm alone

but now I'm more
grounded

than I've ever known
  Jun 2014 EJ Aghassi
Charles Bukowski
poetry readings have to be some of the saddest
****** things ever,
the gathering of the clansmen and clanladies,
week after week, month after month, year
after year,
getting old together,
reading on to tiny gatherings,
still hoping their genius will be
discovered,
making tapes together, discs together,
sweating for applause
they read basically to and for
each other,
they can't find a New York publisher
or one
within miles,
but they read on and on
in the poetry holes of America,
never daunted,
never considering the possibility that
their talent might be
thin, almost invisible,
they read on and on
before their mothers, their sisters, their husbands,
their wives, their friends, the other poets
and the handful of idiots who have wandered
in
from nowhere.
I am ashamed for them,
I am ashamed that they have to bolster each other,
I am ashamed for their lisping egos,
their lack of guts.
if these are our creators,
please, please give me something else:
a drunken plumber at a bowling alley,
a prelim boy in a four rounder,
a **** guiding his horse through along the
rail,
a bartender on last call,
a waitress pouring me a coffee,
a drunk sleeping in a deserted doorway,
a dog munching a dry bone,
an elephant's **** in a circus tent,
a 6 p.m. freeway crush,
the mailman telling a ***** joke
anything
anything
but
these.
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