Being with her is exponentially better than anything else in my life.

She laughs at my jokes
She understands my humor
The kind of humor I try on other people
And they wonder what box I thought outside of
And how to get me back in there

She likes the weird nonsense that spurs from my mouth
All the fake scenarios
All the strange hand gestures
And all my weird voices
She likes them all, and they make her laugh

But I don't think this is how friendship is suppose to feel

Do all friends feel the incessant need to hold each other during sleepovers
Does friendship mean noticing the way her skirt sways when she moves
Or the way her eyes dart down to her feet when she walks
Does it mean I'm suppose to want to kiss her when we sit underneath trees

Am I suppose to touch her hand
Am I suppose to not touch it
I want to touch it
I want it interlocked in mine

Does friendship mean she's not suppose to notice my new dress
Even when I notice hers
Does it mean she's not suppose to want to be affectionate with me
Even if just the way she touches my arm gives me goosebumps
Is friendship suppose to feel like you're drowning in your own self pity when she talks about boys
And is it friendship when she cries over them and all I can think is

I could treat you better
You deserve better
I could give you everything
Even my lungs if you really needed them.

Is friendship suppose to hurt this much.