A useless firing squad dropped all of their weapons,
they dropped them because they wanted to see your reaction.
Like usual, I cared far more than I should have,
and when the brown coats came off,
I began to strike,
I really did it.
I knew I was fairly lucky in that moment,
I didn't have any questions about that.
But, I wasn't as lucky as I used to be.
I wasn't as lucky as the cloud of vapor in front of me,
or the man in the back of the police car.
I was never as lucky, as, as, as,
As long as you never hear the sound of my voice,
and never sit in my car,
I promise, I won't let myself feel lucky again.

Unpleasant fingers that make a noise that I'm not comfortable with,
Not on my watch will you slander the name of her Boar.
Under the dandruff wigs of fellow coachmen,
I stand and say: Follow the path of preferred map-tracks,
Disregarding the glass of subtle milk,
Disregarding the shattered plastic, all, over, my, head,
Believing in a higher power, is, what, I, said,
Kevin, you need to leave me alone now,
I hate the paperboy.

That young man does belong in your past,
I saw him there when I brought your homework to you.
He had very yellow eyes, which was great.
The truth is, I prefer to stay away from these types of situations.
The ones where you don't even remember how to huddle,
The ones where a group of older kids dog pile on top of you,
Those things make me feel overpriced.

Get out of the way when I tell you to,
Do not misplace your commas!
I live in the bottom of the puddle,
with all of the moss that is in your voice.
If you don't keep away,
If you even think about showing your face around here,
The mayor will give his two cents about that.
I guarantee it.

I am really, sorry,
I'm sorry that your favorite place to hike,
Turned into a place to shoot up.
"You are legal here, now, so make it work,"
The inspector snarled quite silently.
You know if my neighbors see you up here,
They might shoot you,
They might sic their dog.
If they catch you,
On this side of the lawn.

You've been using, you plate of ****,
What the hell took you so long anyway?
I do not remember where that came from, thanks.
If you ask me one more question, I'll be forced to do something,
I don't want to sick my companions on you,
But they have an impressive track record of being understanding.
Freedom is useless when you have a sick man like that on the loose.

Prayers upon prayers,
How am I supposed to explain that to the boss?
He would tell me to make myself at home,
He might offer me a nice cold cup of red coffee,
He would say, "What is on your mind?"
I would tell him everything.
Then you would be dead,
But I suppose it was worth it, wasn't it?
I'm gonna give it to you straight,
You're a lousy athlete.