He's here, he's here, he's here,
Everybody climbs up on Grandad's knee.
His stories are very fragile,
His laugh is covered in moss.
Grandad, did you ever **** a man?
No, Chester, I only buried him.
Grandad, what is it that happens when you die?
You know, none of that matters now that Murray is gone.
You really are not the man I thought you were!

I would like to take you out on a camping trip,
but the last time that happened it didn't end up too well,
This time let's not invite that other guy.
It sort of bothered me how he was just laying there,
I mean, hello.
Can we have some privacy? Honestly!
That one was a no-brainer, if you were to ask me.
Oh well, anything's better than spending an evening at Dairy Queen.
Or in an abandoned Burger Joint's parking lot.
The benefit of the doubt can go an incredibly ******* long way.

I never really liked parties,
I can tell you that much, however,
You told me a picnic was in order.
I thought I'd stop by, though I planned on leaving early.
When I got there, everyone plugged their nose.
They all collectively told me that I smell awful.
I got sort of mad.
What a rude way to treat a guest.

You tried to beat me when we played the quiet game,
but instead you cried until the ground duty told you to shut your mouth.
Shut up, Hector, you oddball!
What on earth is it that you want to give me?  
Is that a baseball card?
No thanks.

I never really liked to play nice in the house,
What I did like to do was throw the football around the living room.
It was very dangerous, and my mother never enjoyed it,
But it definitely made me feel more euphoric than you ever did.
You're a judgmental man without a buck to his name,
Why on Earth did you head down the wrong path?

Please restring your useless piece of junk,
those types of friends are banned in this area.
Haha,
I see, you want to tune mine now?
Maybe you should have done it when you had the chance.
This young man will never look you in the eye again.
That's gotta hurt!

The Blackboard, it's filthy!
Shut up, my dutiful students.
My nasty breakfast is full of surprises,
I decided to eat it before my first day of school,
But me and Clint crossed that bridge together,
It was a bridge full of useless tears.
he told me about the demerits you gave him.
You are one sick *****.