Evacuating the life,
Life of sadness.
Instant gratification is the death of her.
She sees her sorrows float away, and
Empty skies turn to poetry

Maybe if I just close my eyes
squeeze your hand
hold you
as tight as i can
(not trying to hurt you, never)
but id try to hold on
tighter than i would ever let you hold me
i can keep this
i can make sure we never change

i believe in the idea of embracing change
it has always proven true before
even the worst bruise will eventually heal
no mess stays forever

you are the exception
for if i lose you, what else am i?
i am me
i am not dependent, no
it is just that me is a whole new person with you
better than ive ever seen
thats one thing i dont want to change

so if you notice me squeezing
closing my eyes at the 11:11 mark
(the same wish every night)
just dont let go?
dont question it
and we can let everything change and grow around us
any change with us
we can do together

But we are too young to be this broken,
too young to be this stressed.
society has messed
with the heart of this tennage.

Wherever we look
somebody is judging you.
no matter what you wear,
no matter what you do.

Hearts are being broken,
Bodies are being piled,
Tears are being spilled,
And everybody wonders why.

That young and quiet girl,
the one who nobody ever noticed
cuts her wrists and cries all night.

The girl who everybody loves,
who has a perfect boyfriend
and a perfect life,
is pregnant and wants to die.

So why are we so calm?
why are we like that?
nobody noticed that
this life is messed up?

Lately
I haven’t been sleeping so well.
My bones waxing and
Waning.
My head full of foreign voices,
And eye sockets stinging with
The metallic tang of
Exhaustion.
Hands claw wildly at thin air,
Fingertips searching for
Ghostly beings.
Limbs turn to jellyfish and
Float
languidly down the
Riverbed
Of tomorrow.

I am fourteen
and my skin has betrayed me
the boy I cannot live without
still ***** his thumb
in secret
how come my knees are
always so ashy
what if I die
before morning
and momma's in the bedroom
with the door closed.

I have to learn how to dance
in time for the next party
my room is too small for me
suppose I die before graduation
they will sing sad melodies
but finally
tell the truth about me
There is nothing I want to do
and too much
that has to be done
and momma's in the bedroom
with the door closed.

Nobody even stops to think
about my side of it
I should have been on Math Team
my marks were better than his
why do I have to be
the one
I have nothing to wear tomorrow
will I live long enough
to grow up
and momma's in the bedroom
with the door closed.

Tonight I let go.
I let go.
Oh God, I let go.
I just never knew I could.
But I won’t let it haunt me any longer.
You’ve spent enough time inside this head.
I refuse to be brought down
by what you expected me to be.
And I refuse to let the man I’ve been
hold back the man I’m supposed to be.
I’m not collecting any pieces,
and I’m not filling any holes,
because I’ve been here all along
and now I’ve been set free.
Now I see what it’s like
to let love burst past all the dams,
and how it feels to flood my veins
instead of all the fear I had.
Tonight I let go,
so that these aching hands can grasp
and this surging heart can love.
I let go
to make space for so much more.

i am surrounded
by such beautiful faces  
and delicate bones.
and to come
across the thought
that there is a
broken heart
behind their comforting eyes,
makes me weak.
and behind fragile arms
are scars.
and i dont feel any pain,
or the need to  f a d e  away
but why are such beautiful faces,
so far into the obscurity?
and why do they have the most
insecurities
and
incomplete happiness?

you have the same
dwelling eyes,
as i remembered.
and you have the same
soft lips
and although you are much
older
and taller now,
you are still the same
little girl i remembered.
i know daddy left
and mommy is struggling,
but you are still the same,
strong
little girl i remembered.
and i know you are
much more involved
in what you think
love is, but
you are still the same
strong,
emotional,
little girl i remembered.
and although you have changed
and you are not
very little anymore,
you are still the same
beautiful girl i remembered.

I wonder how you are
Because my Mom asked me about you today.
She misses you, you know
I told her,
We live in different worlds.

You,
In your glitter-filled, amplified, distorted, boozed-up soiree,
And I,
In your memory.

And in case you were wondering,
I miss you, too.