double ring
triple ring
the bull's eye's
happiness i'm seeking

focused in only joy and ecstasy
full bliss and sanctity
craving for my utopia
caving to be happy

depressive thoughts
with anxious distraughts
just a little under the influence
and an escape is all i've ever sought

is being happy
that much of a mystery
is it too much to ask for
to be free

double ring
triple ring
the bull's eye's
foolin' us into losing

*-djs

Impossible;
tried a hundred twenty times
and still cannot find a rhyme
to write about you
and everything you do

Unrealistic;
wrote about trees and wrote books
and still cannot write the way you look
from the way you carelessly smile
to your suspiciously gleaming eyes

Hopeless;
effortlessly described the smell of rain
and listed every one of life's pains
yet cannot rationalize all the good in you
along with the bad that still shine through

yet everytime i write about you
the ink in my hands stay still and blue
and my thoughts cannot go through

You're beyond the bounds of possibility
that i cannot fathom into reality

-djs

i desire to be with you
but to that i must refuse

your honesty
and undeniable charm
but it simply cannot be

your tender eyes
your foolish heart
i want them all
within your flawless acts
but i must repel

you have your own demons
       and so do i
you bear a hundred complications
       and times a hundred more is mine

you've endured a lot of things to be sane
        and i don't want to be another pain.

*-djs

It’s the third of April and I was there
Sitting still, wondering
Observing the lifeless environment that surrounds me
And I simply couldn’t help but think
How did it all come to this
And why

It was exactly a year ago, during April, too
A blossoming sense of the beginning of new life
Little did I know
There was something even more beautiful than the flowers and trees
Something more serene than the feeling of crisp air and bright yellow sunlight
Little did I know that such a lively season
Was above, beyond, and even better than the liveliest things combined

Within three months after, it was mid July
And by then things only got more astounding
“Breath taking”, even
I’ve come to known this cheerful atmosphere’s smiles
Laughs, and confidence, and everything that makes it the amazing familiarity within me
And it was charming and it was lovable
Just like the warm breeze and chilly nights
What a wonderful thing to learn true happiness from the happiest surrounding itself
At this point all it ever was, was everything but sorrowful

Oh and November rolled around
And as leaves started to hit the bottom
Trees started to give up, and flowers started to disappear
So did it
So did it
This vicinity, of all the happiest vibes
The sweet turned to bitter
Just as the blossoms turned to gloom
It fell into a million little pieces
And all they could do was shatter it even more
And all they could blame was itself
All they could judge was nothing but the setting
And the thing that was once like sunshine
Turned into ice cold
Who would’ve guessed
That the happy atmosphere they once knew
Was this dark hole ******* itself into it
And who would’ve guessed
That the strongest, too, break

It was February and
It was the most similar thing to an incomplete train of thought
It was February
And everything was completely gone
The fragrance of what were once the roses
The scenery of what were once the moving lakes
The warmth of all the components of happiness
Its warmth
They were gone too
Too soon, and too fast

And now it’s the fourth of April
I’m still here I’m still rationalizing
I’m still thinking over
Onto why
Why am I the only one left
Is it really fair to leave me the same
Just when everything else had changed

*-djs

As dreadful as an eruption
Deceased like winter
Chest tightening
And fists clenching
As roses ***** right in the throat
Used razor blade on one hand
And tabs of acid on the other
A vast and lonesome world
Population: one-half
Two mindsets coming in unison
Psychedelic tendencies, suicidal thoughts
Insanity occupying a dystopic atmosphere
Swirling smokes, colourful spheres
Intensifying a bloodshed scene
Three, two, one, a blue-green string cut
"Don't do it!" they yelled
"It's not worth it!" they said
But too late, Death grinned at their faces
No pulse, no heartbeat, no memories
No single presence of bliss
Just a cold, pale,
Lifeless
Body in the dark abyss

*-djs