'Pride cometh before the fall' ,
I've spent too long standing tall,
Holding shoulders up high,
And constant sights on the sky.

Mind on macabre of past figures,
With heart on the bigger picture,
So I join a queue with those who fell,
Into a bottomless pit known as hell.

I fell joining Goliath and Caesar
For having too much pride
More leader than people pleaser,
And thats how I died.

For Pride Cometh Before The Fall

Cause in the darkness,
You'd fall faster,
The way you looked pass her,
Not taking time to acknowledge,
All the pain in your life she abolished,
By absorbing it into her own skin.
Now the shadows overlook her tear stained cheeks,
And the shadow caster,
Will only ever see her as a true disaster,
Never understood the hole in her soul,
That no matter what, she could never be whole,
It was all out of her control.

Take time to look around,
Breathe,
Because when the sun goes down,
Those who surround,
You,
Might be fighting darker demons,
Than you will ever know.

I'm Sorry for not noticing.
I'm Sorry I couldn't build an Earth for you,
I'm Sorry that the sky had to be blue,
As though there were no better colours,
I can still remember the way your shoulder shudders,
The cold wind touching on you as I lend you my jacket,
Maybe this is my life's package,
To roam a world without you.
I miss you,
The way a butterfly misses its former self,
The way a ******* addict misses help.
I missed you,
And now I miss you.

I can hear the bells ringing
The eulogy I've been awaiting
I can hear the choir singing
And the tales of my end circulating.

I can hear it all
But confined in this box
Unable to do anything
And the door locks.

Darkness is back
Nothing left but dirt and soil
Everything is black
And I have gained no mortal spoils.

Anguished and agitated
Being barely bred breathable
Clearly crushing childhood
Desperate,dilapidated,dejected, DONE.

Struggling to force sleep,
I refuse to count those sheeps,
I counted demons
.....

The sky is the limit,
Forget the beauty of the stars,
Forget the beauty from afar,
Forget the moon,
Forget that one giant leap for mankind,
ever happened.

The sky is the limit,
That's what they tell me.

There's no u in we,
...
There's a u in us though.
...
I'll let you be an ocean and see,
that there's no us in future.
So you better find another suitor.
My sincerest apologies.
...

Theres a thing I can say two U...
"*******"....
--------

That was cold like solid ice,
In other words it's not very nice.
I think you should understand,
We have different life plans.

------

One day, if you gaze into space
if you stare at the stars,
And you remember my face,
Remember that I'm not far.


-----

I'll look into space daze,
Because I will know it has been days,
And I will not feel much,
By how you've treated me as such.

-----

The dust will settle over your eyes,
and you'll realise what you let walk away,
Because the day after today,
You'll understand what the future lies.

----

Bye, I'll remember you clear,
I'll tell tales of you.
So last time my dear,
You'll find something new.

I am an adult,
No longer the kid I was,
the kid that chased wasps,
ordered ants to battle,
the one to enjoy a bike saddle,
now those are like colonoscopy,
an unpleasant pinch to me.

I could remember,
the feel of the grass on my sole,
As I ran through a field,
Feeling somehow very whole.
Completely oblivious to,
growing up,
where smiling was enough,
and happiness was trying to look up.

I am not the kid I use to be,
I wish I could be,
But the kid that chased bees,
No longer exists in this world.

I had always complained a lot,
Whether it was cold or hot,
If I didn't, my guts felt entangled in knots.
I had complained about getting a shot,
And got told 'you should get shot'.
I would drive into a parking lot,
Complain about why it was called a lot,
When there was so little parking.
I would complain about cats barking,
And dogs meowing.
I would complain,
When the ice cream was plain,
And when I was in pain...

It was just the way I was,
I tried changing who I was,
Only to realize it's changing bees to wasp.
So I stopped,
Dropped,
And just gave up.

To this day I say,
If you can put up with complaints,
Yet somehow stay sane,
There's just a chance we were made for one another.

I believe that,
There is one person,
Made for everyone.
Even in a world of 7 billion people,
There has to be one...

I remember your hair,
As it lit up the night,
I remember the sight.

I remember the morning after we'd fight,
Because we never made the wrongs right,
You'd face to the left and I to the right.

Back against back the next day,
Not a single word we could say,
To make anything go the right way.

I remember your heart made of clay,
The way your sight had stray,
And I could remember you walking away........

That day.

Maybe you weren't made to be different
Maybe you weren't made to be the same,
I do know that you were made to be you.

Poems are a fun thing to write,
The way my pen lit up at night,
And the only way I ever felt bright.

It became more than just an ordinary hobby,
Surrounded by people who said poets are ******.

Poetry is a way of life,
A way to survive,
A path for people who pray to stay alive,
Settled a life filled with strife,
And nothing left to do but let words strive.

That is why I'm still on Earth,
Writing felt like natures calling,
Because even when I was free falling,
Picking up a pen,
Meant picking myself up again.

If I could build the world,
It'll have a paper zoo,
Full of paper animals,
It'll have a paper plane,
A paper town and paper train.

I'll create a little paper giraffe,
Because I know it'll make you laugh.
I'll draw it's spots like paper graphs,
And I'll make it walk on paper paths.
If we went to court I'd let you follow my paper trail.

Doesn't matter how much paper I spend,
I'll always have some paper to lend,
Some of the paper are hard and some bend,
When I text I'll hit a paper send...

But it doesn't matter,
Because you'd light all the paper,
Fall into arson and shatter,
My paper world.

No matter how much I can create or give,
You'll never let any one of my dreams live.

They chose suicide,
With belief that somehow it soothe inside,
For when the grass turned blue,
They had no idea of what else to do.
A feeling that nothing mattered and it was a waste of time,
Laying lines after lines of sadness upon their arms,
Until they finally did themselves harm.
The people who walked a road alone,
Or seemingly alone,
Saw friends as strangers,
And family as dangers.

I had a friend,
A close friend,
Almost a best friend.
Sadly this friend chose the bitter end,
Tormented by names the other kids called her,
From man to other names regarding her masculinity,
The edged blades of brutality,
That rained upon her soul,
And no matter how much time I spent with her, she still has a hole.

I visit her once in a while now,
We'd talk through different realms somehow,
She'd reply in silence,
But i know she would have said something like
'look up to the sky dilweed, theres so much to see. Look at the ******* clouds, look at the sun it shines for you you *******'.
The way she'd berate me but in warm gesture,
I will always remember the one thing she said to me,
'The path you pave is yours to walk, be it alone with a friend, it will always be your path. What matters is you get your ******* *** of the couch and walk that path you lazy ***".

How does suicide.....
soothe a person's inside.
Does her heart and soul,
Finally feel peace as a whole?

I fell into deep despair,
When no one had  hearts to spare,
Had so much love left to share,
And no one to share it with.
Saw oceans turn children in,
And let voices of politicians win,
Even with all the sins,
I could never find a heart to let me in.
I tumbled and fell many times,
Lost my mind on many rhymes,
Touched many books and many spines,
Yet could not find someone to call mine.
It isn't about possession though,
Just a little glint of hope,
I want to see in scope.
I have been through hell and back,
pulled myself off train tracks,
saw myself get heart attacks,
and all I want is a hand to hold.

'No one is perfect',
On the surface,
She is marvellous.

But

She's lactose intolerant,
And thats when she said,
No matter how close,
Someone comes to perfection,
No one can be perfect.

...

Yet from her perfect mouth,
her perfect heart,
her perfect soul,
I could still feel she is perfect.

Come December, I'll be out of University,
Only now has it occurred to me,
That it was the most peaceful place for me.
Names didn't riddle my brain or my soul,
I would leave feeling quite whole.

I have a close friend who kept me warm,
Friends who helped me forget things,
It was pleasant...

But the saying goes,
'Change is an inevitable part for humanity',
plus on the bright side I have a job.
It's much more peaceful than I had imagined.

All the wars that bloomed inside him,
The willingness to fight and survive,
Faded into nothingness,
When she faded into nothingness.

I say so much in words,
Yet when I stop speaking,
I no longer am heard,
So do I just stop seeking?

For words that paint me,
Or metaphors for medals,
That award the blue sea,
and my bicycles black pedals.

Similar simile sings,
Songs of the soul,
Coating hearts in bling,
and piecing parts to whole.

I could paint you a picture,
Draw graphs and figures,
Send you a Facebook sticker,
And yet you'd still never understand.

I could give you my heart,
Tell you to tear it apart,
Tell you to just basically start,
And yet you'd still never understand.

I could give you numbers and stats,
I could ink it on myself as tats,
Send letters to you with homing bats,
And yet you'd still never understand.

I could give you a bouquet of roses,
Speak in poetry rather than proses,
Take photos of me in hundreds of poses,
And yet you'd still never understand.

I could etch it on my skin,
Build a castle of it in sand,
I'd mould it into my chin,
if only you would understand.

You are darkness
Because you are a de-light.
You are more than getting rid of coins,
Because you are more than de-cent.
When I'm with you I can't hear anything,
Because you are the death of me.
I think we are going to get married,
Because I can hear wedding belle.
It would be an issue if I was lion to you,
Because you are the mane reason I'm honest.
I looked over the corner,
Because my interest piqued....

They'll let you rot in mildew,
And they'll just let that **** you.
They'll turn your greens into blues,
And burn you like a dynamite's fuse.

They would make sure your last breath,
Is covered in the stench of death,
They'll show you that this was life's debt,
And that when you're right, you have nothing left.

If you happened to be a girl and cute,
They'd take your purity as loot,
Sever your neck with bamboo till you're mute,
And all of this will be before they shoot.

They'll cuff your leg two sizes to small,
So that you slouched even if you're tall,
They'd make sure you'd answer death's call,
And they'll laugh when they take your all.

I have had experience with death,
Ever since I was a kid.
When my father drew his last breath,
Things became ****.

Mother explained that death is like mash potato,
Once you mash a potato there's no return,
And that would be the pulling of the curtain,
No show left.
That is like death, a person breaking beyond,
Coming back together.

Every now and then instead of feeling blue or sad,
Or even lonely,
I would feel like mashed potatoes,
And that's the best way I would sugar coat,
Feeling broken beyond pieces,
Beyond repair...

Between the nights,
with dimming lights,
I finally knew,
I wasn't afraid to be with you.

You weren't going to turn into the monsters,
that tear at my heart in the night,
You had the care that a heart couldn't foster,
and I somehow knew it at first sight.

You weren't ever going to be Freddy Krueger,
You'd run yourself over with a Kluger,
Than see me in any sort of nightmare,
That is your type of care.

You won't transform into Dracula,
Because with your warm words,
I felt completely spectacular,
and you made sure they were heard.

Rigid airships,
the way she made her hair flip,
this girl was remarkable,
the kind of face that could spark a tool,
nothing loss of impeccable.

When she winked,
titanic sized ships would sink,
and when she smiled,
people would drown themselves in the Nile.

She was the kind of light,
that you keep on at night,
the curves that made dogs bark in delight.

She was nothing short of perfect,
floating into the sky,
leaving everything she knew behind,
and that was when I saw the sign.

She was like a rigid airship,
the kind of girl that if the air was a guy she'd make the air-strip,
But all she had to do was a hair flip,
and I would have given her my life.

She was remarkable.
The kind of girl that the word beautiful,
was made for.

They read the words but miss out between the lines,
As though the struggles of yesterday,
Could somehow be wished away,
Our reality still reflected the barren wastelands and land mines,
And because we had all our limbs,
That we were fine.

We weren't.

Psychological trauma is an old friend of ours,
He drinks with us at night hours,
Sings to us when we are falling asleep,
And with every light, there he is around the corner to creep.

The sounds of fireworks and firecrackers brings us back,
to that place where the shells once cracked,
And bodies became charred in complete black.

I could remember one of the days I was with my brother,
We were close because we grew up without a mother,
We ran miles and miles without a single smile,
Because nothing was hopeful not even for a small while.
I thought that death was approaching when the soldiers came in,
Their green uniforms and some of them familiar faces,
I thought I was going to die.
   And when you welcome the thought of death,
   You start to realise how much you have left,
   And to me that was your grandparents,
   Because I knew after I go, there's no inheritance,
   No food, no money, nothing left to keep them alive,  
   And thats why I did my best to survive.
Tragic however, my brother didn't make it,
We ran and ran but somehow he was still taken,
And thats why war is hell,
Because even in the sound of life's shattering bells,
I can still remember him telling me to run.

Sometimes being alive,
Has less to do with life,
And more to do with death.

Sometimes evading death,
Is what living is really about.
Nothing more, nothing less...

Struggling to stay alive,
We found ways to survive,
That was when we found love.
A feel that the sky is over us,
That it will always be above,
And the clouds rained of fluff,
Showering us in nothing but love.

Love penetrates the clouds,
To let the sunshine pass through,
For wherever the sky enshrouds,
There lives a little love too.

Speak to the heart,
Because sometimes the mind is clouded.

Your soft voice was a sweet coating of honey,
You sang for your own pleasure,
Never sang once for the earning of money,
Your voice became your treasure.

I remember the way you'd look into my eyes,
When you sang your medley of popular songs,
I can still recall the way the sung notes would rise,
And I knew you sang to my heart all along.

Why does you car sound like its having diarrhoea,
Why couldn't you drive something like a kia,
More quiet and peaceful than that humming earthquake,
Our house literally began to shake,
Waking up the baby and everyone in the house hold,
Let me tell you something that you weren't told,
The louder the car does not mean the bigger the ****,
Just means the wall that is you has more bricks,
If you don't get that it's probably cause you're dumb.
So please either sell your car or remove whatever,
**** heap piece you added thats making me lose sleep.
My patience and anger for now will keep,
But you don't want to see me after a night of no sleep,
I am warning you.

This world is full of bad people,
We're living in an apocalypse film sequel,
So even when we pick out lesser evil,
We're all the same, still people,
Till we form death and still people,
People who aren't able to move yet are still people.

We fell apart,
Before we even knew where to start,
Because all along, everything I did for you was from the heart.

When it was my turn to speak,
Teachers would say I spoke out of turn,
Waiting for them to finally return,
I had already forgotten what I wanted to say.
When I tried to spread my thoughts,
I was always caught,
Detention numbers rose,
Because I spoke in poem rather than prose.
Silencing my thoughts with authority,
I stopped thinking like me.

The only thing they taught,
Were all in facts and figures,
Charts and graphs,
From colleges to career paths,
None of which spoke to how I felt,
All the criticism I've been dealt,
And how I'm an iceberg about to melt.

I was made to belong,
I even listened to different songs,
I listened to Katy Perry,
Don't get me wrong,
She's the taste of a chapstick made from cherry,
But she didn't exactly speak to me,
From a different time, a different genre,
Preferred to have paid for a non encore,
Then to have continued on.

When I didn't belong,
I sat on a staircase,
Isolated from playing chase,
Hands to my face,
To cover the tears,
Saying it's just lemonade,
That i had spilt it somehow.

Between being found
And being lost,
I found myself lost.
It was loss after loss after loss,
People without a clue to the cost,
I went upon the big cross,
Praying that one day our paths would cross,
And that faces won't remain memories in gloss.
It was a constant scene of funerals and death,
Losing another person I refuse to accept,
But then time came and another person breathed his last breath,
I felt that was enough.
To never trust love,
Saw my skies down below and not above,
denounced my religious teaching,
Because while they were preaching,
I saw that prayers didn't work right away,
So I waited another day.

I took up religion again,
But it isn't exactly a pen,
You can't put it down and pick it up,
...
That's where I am in question,
Always in constant obsession,
Of whether there is hell or heaven.

Cute cuddly kid,
Silently suffered SID,
Kid casket comes,
Red roses run,
Mourning mornings missed,
Cute cuddly kid,
Nothing more than a baby...

Belief is such a powerful thing,
Deeper shade of gold than any bling,
Belief was the reason Humans saw birds sing,
That melodic tune harmonising with the claps of a tiny wing,
They say love and trust forms a wedding,
Then belief should be the rings.

There was a young little boy,
Who didn't play with toys,
He spent time building model rockets,
Wiring electrical sockets,
He went beyond the mind of a boy.
One day a kid on the playground,
Told him he should be killed for the way he sounds,
That when he dies his organs will be harvested,
And he will lay to rot with other carcasses.
The boy fell apart, fell into utter despair,
Started questioning why humans built a chair,
When they are eventually going to die.

He had a dream once, to be an astronaut,
Hoping one day his dreams would be caught,
But when his voice became silenced,
Not in the means of violence,
Yet he saw no reason to speak,
Saw no learning to seek,
He would sit and stare at windows,
Days on end,
Thinking about his end.
The same kid on the playground once again spoke,
'Everything you ever do and want to be is a joke',
So his light started to vanish,
He swapped all science classes to japanese and spanish,
Learning languages instead of pursuing dreams,
He has finally given up it seems.

Without belief,
A human is set to stray against his dreams,
All the threads break apart at the seams,
And there cease any reason to exist.
So when no one else believes in you,
Keep true to being you,
Because self belief is as important,
As anything in this world.
It is the diamond encrusting of the human soul.

She sat with her arms folded across from me,
she told me a story of a lovely, little, lonely bee,
She said, it bumbled and buzzed towards a big tree,
It was mesmerized by how such a big tree came to be,
The bee would do circles around the tree in exhilaration,
Buzzing bee had a strange feeling of contemplation,
So it flew in one spot buzz, bzz , bzz till one day,
Another bee came to the exact spot without a word to say,
And flew circles, squares just the way he did.

She told me the moral of the story that,
Although the two bees never had a chance to meet,
If fate intertwined they met and will continue to meet,
She places her hand on top of my hand on the table,
I looked at her with a playful smile here....
"Do you think feat is the present of fate....eat ate?"

A smile lit across her face and I felt I knew of certainty once again.

I looked deep into the pit of the abyss,
Darkness surrounds it,
I realised I was just staring into your eyes.
Who would have known,
The darkness no longer wanted to dim,
your lights,
But instead wanted to switch it off.

They convinced us that maybe we weren't meant to be loved,
as though the crippling sky wasn't made above,
when push came to shove,
we would yell "ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!"
We weren't the pillow that people fluffed,
left to be coated and settled in dust,
from dawn to dusk.

We stood out,
The black sheeps, mythical dragons and unicorns,
ostracized from trumpets and flutes we were unique horns,
the same way we were never the petals but the thorns.

We were thrown salty remarks
until prickling words made their mark.
They would never quit,
until roses began to decay and wilt,
draining the black ink from the feathered quilt,
till it became useless.
Humans however are not quilt,
there is no black ink to be drained,
only the love in our hearts that became stained,
with all their criticism,
and yet they thought it was pleasurable to our ears,
dipping us in the same light as those who enjoy masochism.


Love comes from inside the heart,
but they made us feel as though looks is where it starts,
and while everyone else were cars we were go-karts,
always felt inferior at their words,
and in constant pretense that they were not heard.

Our words became loss in translation,
slowly we eventually loss our patience,
As though somehow we became a part of a nation,
A nation that despised those who stood out,
Filling our minds and soul with doubt,
Until there's nothing left to do but shout.

Even when we were loved since birth,
they tried to degrade our true worth,
so as afflicted souls wander on,
we ask ourselves, "was the love ever gone?"

Memory is truly fickle,
Unable to describe songs,
Yet can taste a pickle,
For its taste being wrong.

The human mind is trained,
To remember the tainted,
The sounds of an ankle sprained,
Over the painting an artist painted.

We remember the heartaches and pain,
But we forget the beauty prior,
We rarely ever complain,
About the dance but complain about perspire.

She whispered in my ear,
One thing I thought was true,
And as I shed a tear,
"Be you".

"Don't be the you you want me to see,
Be the you that you like,
Don't change anything for me,
if you're childlike, be childlike."

I stared into her eyes,
The way I would look at new shoes,
The way I looked at the skies,
I said **" I just want to be with you".

Where true love shows,
Is where flower grows,
Right beside her heart,
A rose that can't be torn apart.

Red rose, blue rose, all colours,
Her ribs lay to cover,
Such a golden and loving heart,
He held her in high regard.

Flower petals led her to him,
And their love continued to grow,
Even when lights were dim,
Where he went, she would follow.

In unison, one foot tread after another,
Fingers locked between one another,
As they ventured to see the sunset,
With no thought of any regret.

I was going to write about Napoleon Bonaparte
About how his insecurities must have blown apart,
But I wasn't sure if he was good or bad,
Whether he was sane or he was mad,
I lacked the knowledge to put him in words on a pad,
So I asked myself, who do I know best?
I only know me best and that is not said in jest.
When I was young, I had trouble fitting in,
Somehow they always saw only my skin,
Others told me I shone a light on Earth,
That somehow being optimistic was my worth,
I never could believe them,
Because the lights always felt dim,
I was probably the most negative person ever,
I would see bird flu from a single feather,
Saw how a dog was leashed and tethered,
And only wanted to free it.

When I was 16, I watched myself turn to a monster,
Lost in the world of competition,
I saw myself treasuring grades and money,
Above all else.
The world became a giant playground for me,
Where all people surrounding me were enemies.
This phase ended abrupt
When I had my first commitment,
My first girlfriend,
And although I didn't love her,
I felt I would have grown to,
But I never did grow to.

One day I fell in love with someone,
Someone I have never met,
Someone on the other side of the world,
Confusing plastic for pearl,
I saw a prize out of everyone.
Everyone including this person,
Became someone I easily let in.
So as I grew another year older,
I kept my arms folded,
Kept my heart and soul locked away,
Because it took two decades to get to today,
For me to realise that maybe the world,
Isn't plastic or pearl,
It's more than that.
It is heart and soul,
Finding a reason to be whole,
Even when your heart burns blacker than coal,
There will always be someone to make you whole.
The cynic in me started to vanish,
Because I saw the beauty in memories,
Rather than the pain of the aftermath.
Just because it's a heartbreak,
Just because your heart momentarily ached,
Does not mean that it was never beautiful,
Because it gave you the chance to be you,
The you that has been locked away for so long.

You can compare them to hotties,
But stars are celestial bodies,
With the light that they beam,
Only with the heart can they be seen,
So as they learn to set the scene,
We gaze upon their brightness,
Because in total darkness,
They are the only thing,
Bright enough,
To light up love.

Candle wax, Bees wax,
I sat in my slacks,
Checking over my facts.
I am a guy, check,
I am a cool guy, check,
I am an incredible cool guy, check.
List after list of self motivation,
Maintaining my hearts palpitations,
After a while of checking lists after lists,
I found myself falling from the realm of facts,
Into a realm of fiction.
It almost became an addiction,
Into self delusion that I was better than I really am,
But who really cares.....

        I am me,
And I am cool,
I am an incredible cool guy.