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Star Gazer Nov 2016
The sad thing about tonight is that I'm all alone
I might have even forgotten this feeling,
but I bruise of unnamed numbers in my phone
I can't quite seem to get to healing.

For every call that I have ever made,
For every ways that my heart came to break,
For every single one of my mistakes
Tonight is the night that showed on my face.

Unnamed digits though I know each one clearly
I've deleted those numbers maybe a thousand times
but each time they seem to like the way that I cry,
So tonight is the night that I've grown weary.

So Goodbye
For tonight is the night,
where everything feels right.
The stars, they're beautiful.
As beautiful as the eyes of everyone I've ever loved.
Star Gazer Nov 2016
Please do not praise my words as beautiful
there is minimal beauty in feeling sorrow,
it is the feeling of a steel ribcage carved hollow,
of emptied contents and abandoned cubicles.
My words are the discordant note of a musical,
it is not a hint of unique creation like Picasso,
but it mimics the breaths of Vincent Van Gogh,
so please do not praise my words as beautiful.

I do not wish nor want for beauty
I write to rekindle the flame that has died,
the spark that simply shelters and survive,
I meld words with tear-stained eyes alike rubies.
You do not applaud accidental spillage on a canvas
so please do not applaud the by product of sadness.
Star Gazer Nov 2016
My inner turmoil is almost limitless
yet your patience seems to be infinite.
Some days I feel like I'm drowning
but I don't own it in pride or proudly.
My face goes beyond wrinkled lines
as if a frown could be a simple sign.
I have a hundred different smiles
and while some point to the sky
only three or four are truly happy
because I'm a dog without an owner
facing thousand others who won't own up,
so even without an owner
I'm somehow still feeling like a lackey.
So can you please find it in you
to come back and remind me
that when I need you, you'll be there.
My soul is bruised by inner turmoil,
so please go grab a shovel from the shed
and when I need it, please help bury me
in the sands, in the dirt and soul;
to relinquish the inner turmoil.
I'm a candle burning as bright as I can
So please just let me relive the moments
where I am holding your right hand
and remind me that nothing is ever over.

I'm a candle burning as bright as I can
and I'm not even sure if I'll burn
close to half as long as planned
but please just let me burn.

A candle wick without wax
hides nothing in the black mist,
the smoke is missing
and the flames isn't warm.
  Nov 2016 Star Gazer
Lvice
Red
Red is the color of anger
That burns and boils and bubbles
It seethes and seems to soak into beauty
It is cold and fierce and fiery
And ironically
*red is the color of love
Star Gazer Nov 2016
Take that chance, take the fall
because falling is the first step to flying,
It is the landing you have to worry about
You may fall but never land.
You never really know what you get
until you are sure you want it.
Be sure, and by what i can see,
you want your illuminating star,
no matter how much you push away,
the gravity of that star pulls you in.
So listen to me....take the fall,
because it might just be
the best **** ride you're given in this life.
Star Gazer Nov 2016
It's ok...
Because I don't exist...
It's ok
Because I am nothing
Star Gazer Nov 2016
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I tread the wrong path
made many mistakes
and each turning trail
I found myself lost...
I left part of my life
in the lips of lies
and I'm stuck...
So with aching heart
like crimson cards
packed with silent cries
I hope she at least
hears my sorries.
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I left someone I love...
merely because i thought it was over.
Because I was taught and told it was over,
and I guess this is far from an attempt at closure
but I really am sorry.
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