I hold your hand
but mine has no sensation
numb and heavy
it belongs to someone else
Horror stricken
at how this feels
I cannot touch you
I cannot want you
Any more
The elements of rope
that had bound our tails
as we swam to hide
from Typhon
have been torn
Forever
like the flesh of
my soul that had waited
for you
Only for you
even while I did not speak
secrets you should have known
my whereabouts clandestine
did you forget
that what happens
on the outside
is merely fog of a
disassociated self
I only become real
in the mirror of your eyes
and smooth awakening
of your caress
You were the one
to understand my world
but today,
after being apart for so long
I am still numb
even though you hold my hand
and I pull it away
as you cry and rage

As the bus approached the stop
next to the library
I knew.
The sight of you
standing there
was not a surprise.
Pleasantly, you entered,
toting your instruments like a back pack.
Your weight made the seat
creak, when you sat down
--right in front of us.
For a brief second,
your heart was spared
and then,
out of the corner of your eye
an orange hoodie
dark shaggy hair
and me.
This must be what doctors see
when they tell families their
loved ones have passed;
a pain catching the eyes
making them blink while open.
I selfishly expected
you to understand
as your mouth cried quietly
“he had his chance!”
I wanted to run after you
when you gathered
your
             …things
and got off the bus.
Instead, I watched you walk away
downward face
wasting your last few dollars,
leaving your young heart back
inside our potluck pumpkin pie.
How cruel unmet needs use people.
Your face
that day
hurts me still.
Later that weekend,
he
said to me,
"It’s funny, how I can look at you now
and not get turned on."

You are forward motion.
There are no steps without your shadow
before, behind or beside me.
We are sun that reflects light on the moon
and in turn, the moon lights our paths,
the cycle of light creating light
like cycles
of love creating desire;
creating more love
creating more light
desire satisfied continual motion
even when we are still.
The words we speak  
form mist to pass through
by the moisture of our breath
shaped in letters and language.
Spaces we create
both expanded and enmeshed
by droplets of our waters
lost inside the body.
One body of water.
One body of light.
Creating passageways and shadows
in forward motion.

A jealous glass
of jostling waves
sits alone
on the bedside table
music
fire
lingered lyricism
of passions
mouthed
we own our selves
our bodies
and time
I am never more woman
than when you
are inside of me

My love is like a star
whose light continues
for an eternity
even after it dies.
Look up, it is still there.

Casting solar flares like aurora borealis
I have swallowed its color
Tapetum lucidum
Liquid mercury of blue green dances
Mouth tasting of irredescent residue
Listen…
The static is louder than your breathing
Kinetic energy flows faster
Than phosphorus catching fire
Let it win.
Lift your heart
Your tree pose is nearly perfect

climbing upon notes
riding their vibrations
lilting lightheadness
ridding my soul of carbon dioxide
rising as the sun out of me
I grow higher, expanding
joyous sorrowful ecstasy
tingling inside the blood of my veins
transfigure me into sound waves
I am only sensation
I am only invisible
transparent form of gods
re-born from melody