I would rather bear the burden of my feelings
than let them go

no matter what happens
no matter what I go through
I just want to keep feeling something

I would rather feel pain or despair
than feel nothing at all

that time has come once again
when I can finally walk outside
and enjoy the fresh air

the sights and smells long forgotten
the birds happily chirping again
spring is finally here

headphones in
listening to that music

the music I listened to
before my life got twisted

I wish I could go back to that time
where it seems nothing could go wrong

so many feelings beginning to return for me
I thought they would be gone for longer, but I am mistaken.
all those thoughts that kept me down
yet they are comfortably familiar
all I can say to them is

welcome back

if only I can find a way

to sever myself from what makes me worry

to free myself from this empty feeling inside me

to break away from this darkness

if only I can find a way

to see myself out of this maze

I keep telling myself
just wait a little bit longer

I'll probably end up fine
I just need to wait a little it longer

I think I'm starting to crack
but I only need to wait a little bit longer

I don't know how long I can wait
but I will be fine

I just need to wait a little bit longer

deep and dark
and sometimes deadly
I hide in my room to find it

it tortures me
it tears my soul
I seek out others to escape it