It hurts to see, in front of me, a broken beauty bee to see.
Hear I do,  a tear or two, fall right through, the air to you.
Nothing done, I can not take, but heal the heart, I did not break.

Mend it slowly with gentle touch and gentle word.
Does not take, but what is want, gives back not but what is no.
Hearing only through the heard, seeing only, vision blurred.

Pleading out, attention needed. Coming through, broken bleaded.
Desperately, clawing, shaking. Holding to, what is breaking.
Panic now, tole is taking, setting in all this faking.

Realization of the fear.  All is not, end is near.
Groping wildly in the dark for a smolder or a spark.
Finding nothing but the coals, broken, bitter, all these wholes.

Pictures, pieces, fragmented life, senseless vision, blurry knife.
Edges faded, whole or part, from beginning to the start.
Turned and went, the other way, now forever, gone to stay.

Put together, take apart, all the pieces of the heart.
Whole again, to make of it. Every piece, broken, bent.
Rifled through, figured beat. Two hearts whole, both complete.

this ting  dat im feelin this hive in my mind
this singular consciousness of twisted thoughts
thoughts of what is wanted and of what can not be had

  strangely i hear a bird

this obsession of mine of these thoughts in my head
im still the odd one out a fifth wheel if you will
all of this incessant hurt inside of what i can not express

  strangely i feel a feather

why can i not see past this singularity this idea
this tangled tumultuous event in my mind a sty in my eye
i can not seem to pry it out this hive thought this

strangely i hear a chirp

all of this slow its making me mad and still it stays
this unrelenting thing that is selfish at me it plays
i want this maddening thing gone away far aways

strangely i feel a wing

yet this flies not away from me where I cant hear or feel or see this thing that drives at me and maddens to the sickening of me the passion the intensity of this thing I feel and see
this thing I want and can not have it slowly to will drive me mad this insatiable feeling to posses the passion it must hold because it makes me feel in me a thing ive never had for me and stirs me how it does how can i hold it back and still see whats right in front of me this thing I want but can not have these feelings that burn inside and wont fly away i must betray i do in word the thing that has a hold on this part of the one of i see...

What is this, this incessant need to help?
Why must I help everyone whos path I cross?
Be it emotional or physical, monetarily or otherwise.

I have to help but want none when I need it.
I can handle whatever baggage is placed upon my shoulders,
but I cannot seems to handle my own
and im being crushed under the wait.

What is this paradox that I'm in?
How do I stop this ride from spinning so fast?
Its making me sick but I dont want to get off.
How is it that I can handle everyones burdens?

I can help you, If you'll let me.
I'll carry that for you if youd like me too.
I'll walk that line if you need it.
I can be that person for you. I can whatever you need me to be
I can  handle it cause I have to, cause I want to, cause I need to.

I wish I knew why I dont want anyone to help me
I just know I feel free of the emotions that seem to plague others.
So I guess I need to feel them through everyone else.

Love, Joy, Pain, Hate. I feel these
Sadness, Misery, Suffering. I feel these
Kindness, Caring, Empathy. I feel these
Hope, Passion, Trust. I feel these

I feel emotion I am just not controlled by them,
I rule them not they rule me.
I can not not help someone but I dont want help when I need it.

Thanx for the crumbs they taste great, they are a little green though. **** it I don't want crumbs, I don't want a piece of the pie, I want the whole **** thing.

Thanx for the bone, I gnawed on it all day, though I it was a bit green too. I'm sick of the bones, and I don't want scraps from your self indulgent plate. I want the whole **** steak.

Thanx for wasting my time. It took a while to do but I got it done and it was good but you wasted it anyway. Now I think I will Just burn it. I'm sure you wont mind, it's of no consequence to you.

They don't understand, That was my foot in the door that just got slammed in my face. Oh sure you'll use it on a secondary nature, tertiary at best. No prominence there, I guess you don't think the for front is good enough for the sounds you'll be making. Mine sounds are wailings.

Thanx for investing in me only to pull your offer back then wag it under my nose like yer teasing a dog. Its nice to know you believe in what I do. Its okay though, really, I can handle.another scar. They just add character.

But hey you gotta go with what's gonna work best for Your bottom line to pad your pockets, ***** the little Guy, He don't need to catch a break even if he shows he can do it the hard way. It was only my foot in the door but its okay, you didn't break it when you slammed the door shut on my face.

Thanx for your crumbs and bones. They taste great.

yesterday i wandered away from myself
i found myself looking back at what i thought was me
but the someone looking through the mirror didnt see

the someone not seen didnt know i was looking and felt left out
the left-out one looked around and seen all that had been looked in on and stepped out of the mirror to go back from then on

then on went the symphony of the seeing and the seen all that is there to be seen is there right in front of what i thought was me
on with all the looking and seeing back at me

yesterday i wandered away from me to see the other mees that visit every once in a while and i find i like all the mees i see even if they cant see me

i broke the me seeing mirror i was getting bored with it i started to see the me that i didnt want to see the twisted feeble dying old me
that scares me the feebleness the frailty of it all

i put the pieces of my me seeing mirror in a dresser drawer
so i could put them back together again when i am that feeble old me so that hopefully ill see the me i want to see again.

i know that me is still there and that me sees me now looking at it wondering the same thing as i is that the me i used to see when i saw the feeble me old dying me that me scares me.

so the me i see broke the me seeing mirror cause he was scared of me...