i don't need compliments
and lavish words to bathe in
nor do i need to be taken care of
as if i'm not able to handle myself
i'd rather stand in the middle of the road
where a car can take my last breath
while you weep on the curb
and drop to your knees
than suffocate myself under your wrath
so don't offer me a hand
as though i'm suppose to *accept it

Walk over to the cabinet
Barely scraping your feet against the kitchen floor
Grab a tall glass
Pour it slowly till it's full
Drink it
All the faults
Tilt your head back against the wall
Slide down
Lay on the ground because that's all you got
Slip away for a few moments
And realize you got a hell of a lot more than most

There are things I wish I could control
Things that I don't understand
The things that I wish would happen
Even the things that make me cry

I'd love to know why you sip your coffee that way
And why you only like pizza on Friday
Why you rub your eyes when you're nervous
And for God sakes why can't you face your fears

I'd just like to know why do I mean so little to you?
*Why

A constant struggle
Putting together fractions of the unsolved puzzle
Smashing your head against the wall
As you lament by draining your waterfall
Rupturing every bit inside you
Expressing the powerlessness you thought you outgrew
Sono innamorata
Flowing through me like burning lava
It's unfathomably superb
Keeps you on high hopes
And a stage of being morosely absurd.

Look at the way she laughs
The way she looks back when she smiles
To make sure she's putting on a good show
Her grace
The way she wears that lace
And the way I run my right hand down her spine
Then she turns around to make sure I still look at her the same
It's a constant battle of perfection
Every move is a calculated selection
Who knows when she'll realize I love her
All of her
Not just the time she rubs her fingers through my hair
Or the times she stops and stares
Then gently kisses my hand
And even when she laughs so hard she is unable to stand
Then of course she latches on to me
That's the moment that nobody can see
How wonderful is it to grasp something so precious
A love so infectious

Security brings clarity
A feeling of happiness
And a little taste of bliss
Why oh why can't I try
Instead of swallowing up all these lies

Sighs, I know what I need
And I'm going to get it till I bleed
Or maybe keep it simple
And let the vibes ripple.

The outline as your lips quiver
The way your four wrinkles align with your emerald eyes
You're flummoxed
Suffocating in a loaded box
You become disoriented
Unable to fulfill your own yen
The incompetency for serenity
You're detained in a stage of captivity
Stuck in a cloud of woe
Your brain is a disaster as so
Again, the process of creation begins

1,2,3 Go

The air I exhaust is the breath I long for.
The desire to be emasculated by your every touch.
Your endeavor has gone more than noticed.
I come alive at black to stare at a gleaming light to try to understand your dreams.
My every minute is spent in a stage of being absent-minded.
I inexorably begin to discern what I crave.

You