i have  always wanted to be the
the hand inside your blouse
warm, caressing
i have always wanted to be
the head beneath your dress
under a desk
i have always wanted to be
the warmth between your thighs
and fulfill your every craving
i have always wanted to be
the chest that you would sleep on
while i caressed your hair
all night long

the fragrant fallen blossoms
have passed me by
i closed my eyes
for a moment
and thought of you

as you walk towards me
i am undone
as your lips unravel my very being
i am yours
how many times must i die
to finally live
what cup must i drink from
to save myself from becoming  
what i fear
in your arms  I have found
the realm between heaven and earth
you are my cup
i will have my fill

did i ever tell you
  you saved me
from myself
did i ever tell you
  i will never be the same
did i ever tell you
   the day i saw your face
it was through the portals
  of my soul
and i wished i could have seen you
with a hundred eyes
  did i ever tell you
that knowing you has
brought the mercy of God
upon a humbled heart
and the house of love
has opened its doors
and its fragrance follows me
all the days of my life

morning arrives
songbird serenades to open sky
while i find my heaven
within a cup thats stained
likened unto a mocha chino sunrise
outside my window  a
fragrant dew soaked crimson
petaled rose
holds no interest
all my concentration rests within
the slow dark descent of liquid gold
as my forefinger makes slow circular motions
tracing the painted daisies upon my cup
my nostrils flair
as the delectable scent of vanilla cream
extrudes from the ***
its ready
i can almost hear it say
are you comming

tiny overseer of my sleep
who see s all with ebony button eyes
of endless depth
the silent observer of my dreams
he descends from a proud ancient line
guardian of all sleeping angels
who remains steadfast
in his quiet place
of seemingly endless  meditation
next to me

i hear the voice of my goddess
i will pass through the silk scarlet veil
and walk down the hallway  of memories
where each room i laid down my soul bare
to the sacrifice of pure pleasure
and to the joy of everlasting love
or so i was told
and on those nights alone
looking out my window
i will light a candle
and make a wish
that a golden  voiced goddess
would just say hello
and have a cup of coffee
with me

there on the kitchen table
a  single long stem rose
lies prostrate across the
morning dishes
a coat and hat carelessly
thrown upon the floor
theres a storm above
and the sound of distant thunder
rolls across the four walls upstairs
and i believe
lightning is about to strike

rose in the mirror
most ardent lover
reflective beauty without the thorns
wearing only
red radiant raiment
before me
unashamed, flawless
bathing in the light of
one single candle
remain there in the looking glass
my love
until your transient ways
will leave me alone
once again

la rosa muestra
su pasion
radiant bajo el sol
aun mas hermosa
bajo la luna y estrellas

so many people
each one making their way about
opening worlds within
bound covers
filled with possibilities
and the words flew off pages
like young birds
into minds that will grow wings
and for a time will leave
the nest of everydayness
sometimes
as the book is closed
the still dizzying effect
of its power
has left with the reader
as they find their way out
of the labyrinth of pages

god i hate you
just one look
and i melt like butter
to your
hot steel knife gaze

there is skin
then there is fire
must i burn to touch you.
if holding you brings flames
then i will be consumed
until my phoenix of desire
rises from the ashes
to be engulfed
again and again

sometimes i want to
push you down the stairs
do you have any clue
of all the pent up feelings
i have inside
sometimes i want to paint horrible things
i want to write poetry
that would have me jailed
in 23 states
i want to scream
is it too much to want someone
who says, yes go run outside through
the woods naked
better yet , join me
yes, sometimes i wish i would just die
sometimes, just sometimes

god i hate you
just one look
and i melt like  butter
to your
hot steel knife gaze

what is it about mornings
you drag yourself
to the mirror
when your sub conscience
would rather drag you over hot coals
is it about the deniability ?
thats not me in there
its only in the safety of mornings
when your eyes have the look
of two cracked crystal glasses
bleeding red wine
when the mirror tells you
its never about the reflection
its always about the need
always

i have found that delicate balance
after all these years
the even keel , the north star
as it were
that exchange of surrender
versus
going on to do more damage
to myself
no, by no means am i giving in
to being old
but a more convenient
outlet of my desire
love
it exists
yes in all it being
i have found love

beloved
you are my
red rose sky
after the rain

oh swan curved neck
slow descent to the shoulder
and on
kisses placed gently in rhythm
as swans upon water
lips like wings
gliding over the velvet surface
till the last ripple
has left the
heart shaped lake

i am headed one way
with the stampede of steele
driving among the honking heard
and beeping beasts
i will try to make it
to the watering hole
where i will convince
some fox
i am not  an animal

******* people
for i would rather read a single line
of prose to the stillness of a single tree
then to the warm blooded movement
of someone whose soul deadness
far surpassed that of firewood
oh for the sigh of one sympathetic
flower
who understands the wind, the rain
the sun, and the pain
of being born to close to roses
for the only difference between tears
and a single drop of rain
is where the journey began

esta noche mi amor
estoy en tus brazos.
  ruego al reza
la luna y estrellas
nunca dejan te chispa
la vela se desvanecera
saldra el sol
y con su luz
me dejas

i love the soft subtle shadows
you create upon yourself
from lights above and below
they move as a sundial
across my world
telling me
what time it is
and now, shadows time and myself
all moving in the same direction
and purpose
and it is very possible
that night has arrived again
here and now

i feel the old ways
the ancient ways
rising like fragrant incense
finding their way
back to us as old friends
perhaps someone will love them
once again
as they come with myths and legends
to a world  that can no longer
find the blue bird of happiness
so when you meet someone
who is lost
or has lost something within themselves
perhaps in their deepest being
they are knights in shining armour
in search of a dragon
that has yet to be awakened
by the voice
of  a little child

how dare we stop watering the very fruits
of our brave imaginations
by strangling ourselves with rancid reality
until we are chocked by the smoke
from fires burning in the fields
of our dreams
is it blood you want?
beheadings, more war
as for me
i shall enter the shadowed depths
of the dark wood
and rest my head upon a soft velvety
green moss pillow
beneath a towering oak
gazing into the endlessness
of Gods cathedral ceiling
and someday wandering into a clearing
i will behold camelot
where right is might
and believe that good will overcome
once again

i wish you could see your face
eyes rolling in ******* ecstasy
lips wet with words
i will never understand
   i am tasting
all your passion
watching your delicate hands
grabbing sheet
with the strength of steel
    and now
the planets align for you
   and now
if only
   you were mine

yes i let you in
and within all that enormous  space
i had forgotten
you discovered the place
i had shut off from the sunlight
and within the force of love
the strength of light broke through
the prisoners i had held there
came out
no, not to hate me
but to love me
for in every heart that beats
all that energy that is afraid to love
and allow to be loved
is over whelming
yes my sister
i let you in
and i will never be the same

the sweet smell of
night blooming jasmine
fills the room of lovers
intoxication of senses
grasps my soul
as my lover grasps skin
i am lost

you are my
red rose sky
after the rain

my love has been held behind
the iron bars of all my pain
such a sentence for a poet
  i have heard of true love,
and yet
the emptiness of my soul
finds contentment looking out
into such a place
i will light a candle tonight
one candle
and try to remember who or what i
murdered along the way

i have no country
boundaries, lands, mountains
and oceans i have passed over
to be here
i write for love of the beloved
for the beloved
i write for you
my  fingers hold pen in hand
guided by my heart
as if a life of its own
has taken over
ah spirit. break my heart
again and again
let us dance together in open fields
for joy, where only the wind
is the music of my soul
and so i shall write
for the beloved
i will write for you

journey of the soul
departure from sanity
my mind now time travels
and entwines with my dreams
for i have visited
the room of inner peace
i am no longer looking in the direction
of mundane pleasantries
i will find what my soul loves
as searching candle in hand
peering past the darkness
then, i hear a voice
go out tonight
and see a thousand candles
in the sky
they are reminders
that others have found their way
will you

if i never hold you
if i never kiss you
then perhaps one day
when we leave this world
we shall become as two silver clouds
riding on the wind
and be part of every
sunrise and sunset

can i take off this mask now
the one i have worn
    for so long
its the one i found
when i was alone
then, it was new
nobody knew yet
the rotting flesh of truth
existed beneath all the lies
how i wanted to be gentle
but the mask
demands its dues
i am through paying
   i am an artist

with you
i am adrift upon love
and there is no earth
to land upon

sat sat quietly sipping tea
from a porcelain cup
her head ever so slightly
tilted to the side
with a fixed gaze looking
past the sun lit window
as if someone she knew
would be coming
rising from her chair cleaning the table
save for one cup and saucer
which now glimmering
in the rising sun
showed a tiny web
of unknown time

there is a silence within this house
the crisp sound of a
page turning within these
four walls is not vibrating
in my ear
even the very chair
you sit in
has an unending emptiness
within it
even though the phone rings
dogs bark
and outside the open door
the birds sing to fill the wood
with music
yet, there is a silence
for in your most quiet moments
i at the other end of this house
close my eyes with contented smile
knowing the beating heart
of my beloved
is filling the house
with the crisp sound
of happiness

how do you kick someone to the curb
because you just might
fall in love
how to eat your own heart
do you taste the love going down
will it be seasoned with the
salt of your own tears
how do you leave their arms
in the first place
oh pure contradiction
the price of looking in the
wrong pair of eyes

walk softly into my dreams
and wake me not
speak gently to my heart
and leave a kiss upon my thoughts
write words of comfort
upon the wall of my soul
and leave as you came
and wake me not

have you ever seen
a bed lying on the side of the road
well, perhaps
in all its threadbare mystical past
its  ancestors were flying carpets
and feeling the wind
beneath it
driving down the road
it believed
it could fly

who could pass you by
without a breathless gaze
and who would have known
the first day you arrived
a picture window shuttered
from your very presence
ah open stranger
you give so much so soon
hardly time for caresses
before you drop your velvetine clothes
onto the floor
saying goodby

i want to be free of you now
but the ghosts of time
always linger
the parade about you
with eyes straight into yours
no, never just a glance
with just  a hint of goodbye
perhaps
in all its deepest simplicity
they just want to be recognized
for who they where
and then and only then
without so much as a whisper
there gone
but then thats the hardest part
remembering who they where
not what they became

when does the cold wind
stop blowing
the frost that lays upon the earth
and the long winters night end
when the first rose blossoms
radiant , soft
and the sun takes notice
for winter ended within myself
when i first took notice
of you
radiant , soft
and then the warmth of summer
fell through your smile

when two people are apart
whose souls have spoken
during quiet moments
time like darkness
falls upon them
that is when dreams
come alive
and the soul speaks again

i am not afraid of my imagination
its power draws upon
its very silence
of my thoughts
so my soul can hear the faintest
whisper of a poem
and the words begin
to loom larger then sky scrapers
lines growing wings
and flying off into the darkest night
of my dreams
only to arrive here for you
and you alone

with her back arched
head tilted upward
and eyes opened to the heavens
at that moment
she saw stars
and only the universe exploded
as two worlds melted
becoming one

even in her latter years
she moved like a girl
skipping
hiding her face
single handed
blushing
a man passing by on the street
said
how attractive she was
ah endearments
the fountain of youth
pouring forth
from our lips

when she first heard the  music
her soul had already moved within
ancient rhythms  stirred
impassioned thoughts
kindling visions of nomadic dances
endlessly circling the fires
that rose into the night time sky
and then
her feet began to move

a dozen red roses
now carefully dried
bound by a single strand
of purple lace
perhaps a memory
of a love gone by
no, not laid down
somewhere at eye level
but above
perhaps as a prayer

WITH YOU
I AM ADRIFT UPON LOVE
  AND THERE IS NO EARTH
     TO LAND UPON