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David Crow Feb 2019
Sense of self-worth is something,
yet I don't know who I am
supposed to be,
Say something I could understand
and promise me to leave
me alone,
I don't understand why I have
no money and I am obsessed
with an image of someone
that I can never be,
I really want to write the
things I could never say and
I am affraid to say what I
want to write,
This is out of my dictionary
and the right words never
come and I lose the meaning
of it all,
I am an imitator and a
my feelings frustrate me to no
end and precisely everyting
bothers me, to be honest,
what do I need to do when
I smile and grin at the
same time?
Something is horribly wrong
with me and I cannot make
sense of my surroundings,
this... this is what I
wanted to do! Yeah!! Oh, and
ontop of that, I'm somehow
consuming more than I
could chew;
there is nothing wrong with
me in a way and I
care about what happens when
I die,
Yes, I'm angry all the time
and it all starts from one simple
word that I did not understand
and it goes out to show that
I'm scared to be alone and
I do want to say so to someone
who cares,
life itself confuses me so there's
no point to even trying,
I lie and scream all the
time for no reason except when
I want to say something .. then
I keep quiet,
my mind is way too confusing
for people to understand so
there's no point in even trying
to speak,
the end is where I begin and
in the void I shall end!
David Crow Feb 2019
I know things I shouldn't know,
I did things I should have not,
I know I can be better than
the past version of myself..
but my anger frustrates me,
Laugh and confuse me,
spit and frustrate me,
pull my hair and beat me
up for I am chocking on
my own words,
The meal is served and I
deserve a serving of the best,
but what if there is a chance
I could make sense for once
in my life?
Is that really an option for me?
No! It's funny to ramble and
make no sense 'cause everything
goes when it makes you feel
a certain way,
And I intend to be this way.
David Crow Feb 2019
I don't have much to offer
in terms of a steady thought
process or strong memory...
quite honestly, I don't think
much to begin with so if you
would ask me
how my day went, I would
just shrug it off and keep
mumbling under my breath
whilst wondering why no one
listens to me.... hmm, maybe it
could be because I don't
stop talking but maybe I'm
just daydreaming, self-loathing
and complaining all the time;
I am very pissy,
I have the attention span of a
goldfish and I get sad very easily
and I can't figure out why.....
oh, maybe It's because of all
of the above mentioned shenanigans;
yeah, and ontop of that I
repeat myself quite often...
very often, to be exact,
I need a breath of  fresh air,
a shoulder to cry on and
I simply go insane from
the pain  in my left eye,
I need to stop and think for
one moment about what
I am about to do and if
the powers that be allow it,
I will fill the void inside my
heart and I will try to find out
why I feel like I am being
watched. The end.
David Crow Feb 2019
Words that mean something,
tears that sometimes end up
in the ocean,
trash I like to eat,
or maybe I need food?!
Hmm, it's hard to choose....
What am I even talking 'bout,
I know what got me here
and for your information..
I know how to go back to the
Why do you even follow me?
Are you blind to the truth or
something made you confuse
me with someone else?
Ugh, you're still here... ... .
You're cute but something
is horribly wrong with you,
cry, my love.. it will make
you feel better,
and then you will realise it made
me feel good aswell,
then we can all sigh again
and make things right.
David Crow Jan 2019
Deserters are near,
I'm filling with fear,
I am never right
but when I am it's just luck,
Something is bothering me..
holding my throat,
It could be the words
that I've never thought,
but if I don't think..
why do I feel
the need to express
this feeling of stress,
caress; embrace him,
I could care less,
But remember I'll never be
right where you need me to be.
David Crow Jan 2019
If I had a strong oppinion,
If I ever got my way,
If I ever said I'm sorry..
nevermind these things I say
'cause all these thoughts - they
make me go around the block
inside my head,
the truth I like to swallow up,
never see the light of day,
Symmetry and structure I don't
have to aid me in my life
so maybe when I open up
just shut the door and
throw the key.
David Crow Jan 2019
No thoughts to call my own,
I have no place that feels like home,
Some days I feel like I'm a clone
of someone great who is long gone,
And if the struggle turns to gold
and if at last I hold my own,
These chains that bind I will shake
and watch the skies and surface break.
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