i sometimes feel like i'm a bit too sweet
that enacts in everyone the 'go away' effect
though i'm shy
and indiscreet
and tasty? i think

but these days i feel like i'm a marshmallow
that enacts in some of us the 'hey' effect
good to meet you
melts on your tongue
doesn't it? i think

and the more you let it melt away
the lonelier it felt, and today
was exactly that rapport
so when can i get some more

congregations of people rock up
and tell you they're all out of L..
hundreds of people
lovely to see you
hey, how you doing, whassup!

i never really know what to say
because nobody ever gives a F..
hundreds of sinners
loads of beginners
hey, how you doing, okay!

rynard was right, when he told me that night
when there's nothing to say, there's no need to say it
when there's nothing to give, don't give it away
keep it for that rainy day

when pessimists are living with you
and tell you that everything S..
hundreds of reasons
so much malfeasance
hey, how you doing, schweet bru!

i don't want to start up a fight
but please can i borrow a few B..
until i recover
i'll go find another
hey, how you doing, alright!

christine was right, she showed me last night
when there's nothing to say, there's no need to say it
when there's something to give, don't run away
don't ever let it drain away

what i can't do is negotiate peace
when i feel like the cause of the war
i'm not going to do it, capiche?
i don't wanna do this anymore

because my home is sacred, as all are
fragile at best, as we all are
sensitive, even as we all tend to be
my home is an extension of me

so please respect it

what do i do?
doesn't matter, i guess
she said so

a fish out of water
what i would give to be
that fish

i love you. i look after you. i take care of you. i want the best for you. i buy you your medicine. i put a roof over your head. i found us the oxygen. i let you sleep in my bed. i let you get into my head. i listened. glistened, maybe. i exploded. imploded, then exploded again baby. i fought, won and lost all at the same time. i need you. you need me. we can work it all out together, you and me. and we'll sail all the seas, as long as we need to, but you lied.

it can be fixed. but you don't want that. it's okay. it was worth it. don't know why. never will. it exploded. imploded, then exploded again baby. and then arranged itself back into a neat little pile. i trusted you. i let myself into the comfort you provided. i must be braindead. tumour, rumour, enough has been said. loser you said, ahead of the rest, put to the test, surely, maybe, but you lied.

i don't mind if you don't understand me. but please stop telling me who to be, and tell jf and nixie to shut the hell up. i get the impression that reason's enough to make me a victim, sure i concede, i don't even know how to read. between the lines, the subtly sublime, i thought it was time, but you lied.

you got what you want and it's not about me
good job

i'm not seeking any atonement
i'm just looking on with astonishment
another complicit assignment
another perfunctory accomplishment

it's worth taking a moment
to throw it all away
because at least you can say
you tried

i know you're not an idiot
so i'll say it like it is

when i've done something wrong
and i've been caught out
i feel a bit embarrassed
apologise if i need to
and try it again
without
*******
it up

but you don't know what's right or what's wrong
and you've been caught out
you ought to be embarrassed
an apology isn't worth it
so try it again
without
*******
it up

i know i'm not an idiot
but you seem to know the difference
i know i'll be okay
because it is what it is, right?
it is what it is.

how to really feel alone
make a decision
then get told what to decide

the reason why i write these silly little poems
is not because you'll read them
oh god no
it's because if you did
at least i'd have something to say

if i was set adrift in a sea of doubt
there'd be no doubt
if i could see

if i were to imagine the drought
there'd be no drought
or famine

but i can't
because i'm .............
wood for the trees
salt for the seas
sympathy for the devil, all that

does me being less me
mean you being more you
or does me being more me
mean you being less you
an arrogant economy
that tries hard to forget you
and it's hard, god it's so hard
to find that delicate ******* balance

between what's right and what's wrong
and where you know you belong
because earth is the place where everyone lives
and everyone learns how to forgive

be it the choices you made
way back in fifth grade
or the people you listen to
while they're hurling resent at you

it's never too late
so why wait

there's a me that loves me
and a me that loves you
most times they're the same

but the demon in me
and the demon in you
are playing a different game

the me that's in me
and the you that's in you
don't have to be the same

but the you that's in me
and the me that's in you
are betting all the same

i didn't ask, but you gave anyway
it wasn't weird, but you thought so
i tried to take it all in, let it begin all over again
but by then you were solo
so low
against the movement of the night
the resistance to the light
the opposite of maybe

you know, and it shows.

the last time anyone
shone through my soul
it burnt

the last time i trusted anyone
and shone a light through their soul
i learnt

to be careful
and wary
and think twice
about doing that again
because it hurt

because it's worth it.
so why put up with it?
it happens

every time
and crumbles to the ground
it wants to hang around
and makes it real, for me
it inspires a new philosophy

every time
an idea that doesn't last
an achievement from the past
like a well-read magazine
it'll always be a has-been

every time
unimaginable pressure
loads of broken furniture
an intricate befunge
my memory's a sponge

every time
you use all your confetti
any time you're ready
waiting for the next text
let's see what happens next

and we didn't hurt anyone
it was fun
back to front, and we're done.

if i had even dared
you know i have
and i totally went and blew it

i know you're not scared
because i am
and i totally beat you to it

we see a million things around us
all the time
and sometimes
none of it makes sense

we see a million things around us
second time
but this time
none of it makes sense

fool me once, fool me twice
another time
and every single time
none of it made any sense at all

except that one time
when it did make sense
enough to want to pay attention to it
and there wasn't enough time

so yesterday i went ahead
i totally went and i did it
because i honestly can't trust
a single word that you say

this is what i meant when i said
let's try and be honest about it
i don't need to know who you're sleeping with
but it is good to know you're okay

it isn't a thing that we choose
to forget
then later regret
i know that it hurts you
with time it will heal
we will feel
it's not like we have much to lose

it's something that we should protect
and admire
squeeze out of the fire
scream if you want to
it should've come first
with a burst
that thing that you'd never expect

come on, please
don't take anything away
because you don't think it's worth it
it doesn't need to be perfect
i don't have a lot to say
on my knees
perfect any other day
even if i think it's worth it
i don't know what to expect
it doesn't matter anyway
let me bleed

suddenly it seems, the seas
remind me of the trees
but then the freeze
that makes me sneeze
another lock against the door

somewhere in my dreams, it seems
behind my selfish screams
that all the greed
behind my need
is always coming back for more

if i am lost then you're alone
you know you're never on your own
as useless as a megaphone
implicitly complicit
like a good idea
on crack

respect
is a thing
when you least expect it

restraint
is a thing
that lets it go

like a dummy
or a pacifier
is a thing
when you never thought you needed it

complaint
is a thing
that lets it go

like a shower
or a memory
is a thing
when you hold on to it

what it definitely aint
is a thing
that you'll control
but i'll do my best, at your behest
no, besides
its a thing
i'll let it go
as long as you're still in control

the fear rises up in me
like the flame from the candle i stare at
that flutters like a butterfly
and gets me so anxious that i
in my cautiously delusional state
prefer to reject this needless hate
it's a thick dark dungeon of doubt
that's left me wanting without
my needing to utter another word
yet it's something i heard
on the radio just yesterday
as if history could have said it any other way

it rises up still
and my only resolve
whatever the cost
is to let it evolve
into compost
into which i can sow
and out of which i can grow

you have a kind heart, just broken i'm sure
i'm not really sure when it broke
and i think we might have spoken about this
at least that's the last time we spoke

i don't know what kind of need, or greed
that made you forget what you did
don't know what kind of misdeed, but indeed
the expiry was stamped on the lid

well look at me now, over here in the dark
i'm blind, and all i can hear
is how sometime we managed to talk about this
but since then it's turned to the fear

i have all the excuses in the world
and i'd love to share them with you, every one
my sensitive complexity already unfurled
we could've figured this out, together

and i guess we still can, but i'm over here
and you're not

it can hurt you if you let it
and recoil if you forget it
will enrage you and engage you
if it ever lets you in it

it can find the missing piece
and offer some release
will implore you and adore you
if it ever gives you peace

but it likes to take its time
and so it should

when i thought you had left me i feared the worst
but that wasn't the thing that hit me first
it wasn't the distance we so far had travelled
or the damage that i knew that we'd somehow unravelled

it wasn't the promises we said that we'd made
or the ring on my finger that i proudly displayed
it wasn't the trust that we'd found in each other
or the comfort i thought that you'd found in another

it wasn't the me, or the why, or the now
or the reason that why seems to matter somehow
it wasn't the space in between, now it seems
there was something stitched closely to the edge of the seams

but now you are here
and i am the now
and that is back there
and this is how

we start from the beginning, get back to the winning
take care of the issues that keeps us fulfilling
each other
with the love that we found
so true and profound
and will keep us together
forever

you know this to be true, because
the only one who knows this is you