Two hearts as one,
Beating in time,
Two birds singing,
So soft, so fine,
Two flowers that blossom,
In the sun side by side,
Two lovers who's hearts,
Will never divide.
Two roads that cross,
Two leaves that fall,
Two hands joined together,
To form one wall.
Two lovers stand in union,
Two lives become one.
The union of man and woman,
A new life has begun.

1/21/1989

You ask me how I am,
I say I'm okay.
I never say I 'm great or super.
I can’t bring myself to tell a full lie, 
Only a half.
I can't say the truth,  I'm miserable.
That my life has not been the same since the day you passed.
That my soul is an empty void.
Yes I'm miserable,
A little voice inside me is shouting.
Yet still I wear this mask.
The mask I use to hide from the world.
The lie that I perpetuate,
The illusion I feed daily.
We all have our masks we wear.
Some have many.
Feeding the beast we call reality.

You came into my empty life,

After so many years alone,

You touch a tired and lonely heart,

That I’d thought had turned to stone.

 

You tore down the walls of loneliness,

That surrounded my dying heart,

You opened my eyes to love once more,

And gave my life a new start.

 

Refrain

You came from the heavens,

 And rescued me,

From the pool of darkness,

I was drowning in,

You threw me a line,

When others left me behind,

And made my life richer,

Than it’s ever been,

Is this the love I’ve been,

Searching to find.

 

I’ll never forget the first time we talked,

The first time I held your hand,

First time I held you close and we kissed,

First time you told me you understand.

 

You believe in me like no one has,

And seem to understand my pain,

You bring sunshine to a lonely life,

That was once filled with endless rain.

 

I hope the road we’re sharing never ends,

As we travel a new life together,

I want you always by my side,

Building memories we’ll share forever.

 

I promised you complete honesty,

Always try to give you nothing less,

My heart and mind are longing for you,

Filling the void of emptiness.

 

1989

I awoke again this morning,

Like so many other days,

Reality there to greet me,

I surrender to its ways.

 

  I know I should thank the Lord,

For the time that we had,

Instead I find I curse him,

For always feeling so sad.

 

Lord, you brought me to my knees,

Stripped my emotions to the bone,

You left me a broken man,

I feel empty, and so alone.

 

  I miss you angel face,

You were my love, my best friend,

My heart forever aches,

For the day we’ll meet again.

 

  You said I could do better,

Though I always doubted this,

Loneliness now shadows me,

Our life together gone amiss.

 

  I miss the comfort of your voice,

The joy of holding your hand,

The smile that always reigned bright,

A spirit that’ll forever withstand.

 

 Will we be together again?

The answer escapes me still,

  Will we be strangers in heaven?

As so many say we will.

 

 I love you with all my heart,

Don’t know if you felt the same,

Wish you would come appear to me,

My heart forever speaks your name.

 

 I can’t let go of my pain,

Cause it means letting go of you,

I’m so tired of this hurting,

No end to the struggle in view.

 

  Now I travel this lonely road,

Unaware of what is to come,

Feeling afraid and insecure,

The endless pain, my heart surcomes.

 

  If only time could rewind,

How different would life be?

Living life like there’s no tomorrow,

Each sunset be our last to see,

 

  Or would nothing have changed for us,

Travelin’ the same road as before,

Living life as if there’s still hope,

Till death forever closes the door.

 

  I hope you’re soaring with the angels,

Living the life you’ve always deserved,

No longer feeling pain or sadness,

Eternal peace for your time served.

I hear the roaring of the waves,
Washing upon the shore,
Washing the sand of my footprints,
The dreams that are no more.

I feel the coldness of its waters,
The cool mist upon my face,
My body shutters at the feelings,
Of loneliness I embrace.

My mind runs deeply in confusion,
While my heart overflows with despair,
All though I try to forget the past,
I feel its presence everywhere.

And though I sleep at night,
My mind does seldom ever rest,
My fears invade my dreams,
Putting my sanity to the test.

I look out across the ocean,
Boundless though it seems,
Its restlessness reminds me of,
My many troubled dreams.

In the sand I leave my footprints,
My only mark upon this world,
Til the ocean finally washes them away,
Making me only a memory of yesterday.

The storm rages on inside,
Battling the demons in my mind,
My heart is torn in pieces,
From the life I’ve left behind.

I want to begin to heal,
To find my way back to the start,
To learn to live life once more,
Feel the joy of love in my heart.

I reach for the hand of God,
Begging for mercy on my soul,
Please save me from myself, Lord,
Give me guidance, make me whole.

What is the truth, the answer?
Is it hidden deep within?
Am I blinded by ignorance?
Is this my mortal sin?

Why is my heart cold, lonely?
Have I grown dead  inside?
Why has love abandoned me?
Left to perish by the road side.

Why does the pain I feel,
******* my body so,
Paralyzing my being,
Keeping me from letting go.

10/7/2011