I am nothing more than a shallow adaptation of who I wish to be
Masking bare basic frustrations and regrets in semi-articulate hiccups of "poetry"
But when it really matters I am speechless
Drained of any authentic essence
Ravaged by obstacles I create within myself
Professional self saboteur
A mass of inner conflict
With a fragile and forced jovial shell hiding it all
Hurting myself and those surrounding me in the process
I am undeserving of those that are in my life