This is not a love letter, but I have to get something off my chest since it seems you have decided to make a home out of me.

You live in my heart and my head, and hopefully one day in my hands.

You have taken down the boards I had blocking the sun, and you have dusted off the blinds. I think you were just trying to prove to me that you can make light touch even the darkest corners of me.

You have painted over my stained walls from past lovers. I hope you cover every inch of me with orange, I want to be your favorite color.

You have fixed my broken pipes and all the shattered lights and I am breathing again. You have fixed every broken floorboard and I promise I will not let you fall through.

You have patched up my roof and weather-proofed me, and I swear I will keep you safe from any storm that comes your way.

You have dug up the dead flowers in my garden. You have trimmed my dead leaves, but please remember to water me.

You have created a home out of me and I hope you never move away. I promise the neighbors are nice and the neighborhood is safe.

If you ever plan to leave please just burn me down, I don't need any owner other than you.

Confined to the minds barrels,
trapped inside four white, wooden walls
that wash me with light;
creating eternity. An eternity
where your face is forced forth
with splintered teeth, wood grain whispers.
Air evades my lungs
breathing in, panic, locked
away. To stay and rot. My tongue
may become a meal; I don’t need words in here.
This chambers grand design
is an endless emptiness.
My mind’s faced with this shameless
white graceless space which
aggravates my dark creativity.
This great sin in me is great and willing me
to spill the hate hidden deep.
The rays rebound perpetually. The silence
perplexes me. Perplexes me. The silence
confined to the double barrels.
Your face, perpetually, stretching its imprint
across these walls. Blurring, screaming terror.
Eyes open, burning, comfort in the darkness
learning the eyelids inner charms.
Not the vastness. Eyes open. Terror.
Tear away these fantasies;
isolations imagination identifies with my demons.


The blank space is filled with cacophonies,
agony, smiles in the emptiness stretch beyond capacity. Silence.
Whispers, these wood grain whispers splinter my eardrums.
No matter how I try to pick (axe) them out,
this imaginary pencil doesn’t dig deep enough.
I hear no calligraphy. No beauty
finds me in here, this box of light
holds my plight and creates a world where I know no night.
I hold no right, I cannot wrong,
there’s nothing left, I hold no rite,
there’s no day to escape for sleep,
no knight to bring me dreams, no left to take me to the right place,
I am so bereft of time. Am I dead?
Dying? Lying here in wait, lying  to myself,
declining in health. Declining life.
The silence is hexing,
dissecting each piece of what’s left of me.
The canvas screams, it wants to know my nightmares,
to feel their bloodied paint on its flesh.
I’m the worm in the water.

I still think about you every single day
I hide the letter you wrote me
And the picture of us crumbled up
In my pillow case
I ripped them off my wall
But I just can't seem
To throw them away

I try my hardest to be so strong
I know the way you make me feel
Isn't right
Its so wrong
So why does your face come into my mind
Everytime I hear a sad song?
The days just pass by
And the nights are just too long

It just hurts the most knowing all
We planned for our lives together
Are now gone forever
And all the words you said to me
Are not important and won't be remembered

Ill forget
Ill move on
Ill try my best
to be strong

But Ill never forget the way you
looked at me with your brown eyes
Ill never forget how you'd tell me you loved me
Over and over at least a million times

Ill never forget when we made love
And how I finally opened up to you
Giving you all my trust

Ill never forget the rhythm of your heart
Ill never forget how you were the light in the dark

But I have to forget in order to move on
I hope that you'll stop me
Before I'm too far gone

My ribs are not a cage
Built to contain
This fluttering beat of wings
A captive could never sing
Anything
Like I’m hearing

Your ribs are not a cage
Not like bars to contain
But a xylophone
Of your bones
To play along
With my birdsong

Distance
Does not have to be
Division
I keep striving toward you
Like a moth to the moon
Like every winged thing
Refusing to be imprisoned
When gravity clings

The wings within my chest beat on
Propelling me to flight and song
Run my hand over the memory of your bones
So like and so unlike my own
And though our bones are not light
Enough for us to take flight
Wings within me
Sings within me
To fly in the face of gravity
To defy what captures me

But my limbs are not made
To fly away
My heartwings beat over and over
And the bone white moon never gets closer
Now knowing what a caged bird sings
Flight needs freedom, not just wings