twist
pull
rip
tear
repeat

the desk needs tidying
tea boxes scattered
focus on the bed
the comfy bed that
needs to be made
but no one can make you leave

pace 3 steps
you took four
back 5 steps

maybe an hour
in the comfy bed
yea, two hours

3 hours
rise
twist
pull

the desk needs tidying
class missed

pace 4 steps
be fair
back 4 steps

maybe a half hour
tear blanket from bed
but it is dinner time
rip skin

repeat

I roll my feelings up
and burn them to the ground
I enjoy the sound
of silent crying
I only want the things
that cannot be bought
I enjoy to shout
I've been smoking a lot
and starting to doubt
if i'm breathing you in
or smoking you out.

Temptress
Smooth-skinned devil

Siren
Sweet songstress of turmoil

You grabbed ahold
Of my soul
Long long ago

And your grip keeps tightening

The moon won't hide us
The stars won't save me

It's beautiful and frightening

black birds circling
you'll be dead by night

but you close in
showered by dim light

the way you sway
I'm willing prey

I'll die a thousand
deaths tonight

you're terrifying
you chill me to the bone

yet enchanting
more so than I've ever known

I long
for that slow
end
at your mercy

I dream
of the fall
at your claws

I want to be a writer.

I want to be a filmmaker.

I want to be invincible.

I want to see it all.

I want to look into your eyes and see something completely unexpected.

I want to dig my fingers through the dirt and discover some ancient secret.

I want to be famous.

I want to be completely unknown.

I want to be seen by you. Really seen.

I want to run my fingers across every inch of your naked body.

I want to run through every hill and valley.

I want to learn to live with the pain and in turn live with unfathomable grace.

I want to forgive.

I want to be forgiven.

I want to move forward with confidence and faith in all the uncertainty.

I want to look into the mirror and be at peace with what I see looking back at me.

I want to learn to live in the present.

I want to...

I want to take all these wants and forget them. I want to grab them and crush them with my bare hands. Let them ooze between my fingers and drip into a puddle on the cracked sidewalk. I want to watch these wants evaporate in the blazingly bright morning sun. Follow the frail ribbons of steam until they become undefined and indistinguishable from the puffs of white moving across the everything.