i hear the call of crows and smile
always they are synchronized with my thoughts
always gently prodding at the shell of my greater awareness
the barrier of contemplation and understanding,
that keeps me ******* thin
from letting the world in

and the sable feathered angels
speak in rhythmic humming
saying, in some way

"look here!
listen! hark!
the chiming bells ring!
the song of heaven sings,
it floats in
upon the wind!

feel it cascading
over you.
feel the alignment
of the microcosm
you call home.

a chain reaction,
engulfing you
in waves
of connectivity.

let these
paper thin membranes
dissolve.

you have already
permeated the skin;
to light
you are transparent."

i'm always seeing hearts in my coffee cup
the moon, a brain, jupiter in the days of the great conjunction
my lapis always seems to disappear,
slipping through the veil, into different worlds
i wonder, if i ever find those pieces
what energy they will carry through to me

it must be marvelous

in the past, some days
i'd wake up in another world
deja vu
much the same
but shifted
mirrored
a tad bit left
playing tricks on my eyes
rewriting memories
but never quite
fooling the soul

a universe within a universe
within a universe within a molecule
within that shard of glass
from the cup you dropped on the ground

and oh well
you'd be better off just pitching it
it's not as if your infinite
strings of copies will feel
the ripple effect of the impact
in a place where gravity is so alien

and anyway it's happening
]]]]]accordion[[[[[
over endless mirrors
squashed together

time is a fickle thing
and in your soulful wandering
you might find information
is condensed in endless
p
r
  i
   s

t
inemoments

shrunk or stretched over
myriad material multitudes
in densities you slip through
never keeping track of what is processed
or abandoned in the phantom pools
of time's slipstreams

in this part of the poem,
i am imbuing words
with the power
of peace and love

if you're able,
drink that in with your eyes
there's an infinite supply

if you've ever decided you didn't need shoes
and stepped into the grass
congratulations! you are now cuddling with
an ancient goddess

try making yourself heavy
to ease into the energy of gravity
and if you're ready
you might bleed into her bounty

then, deep breath!
shake it out
do that thing where
you make your cheeks wobble
it's like pbbldd

that should wake you up
prime your mind for inhaling nature's
peace and loving kindness

you can talk to trees
by humming
in the heart
and pushing that fibrous
energy out the throat chakra

they will reciprocate
by helping you to slow down
and show you how gradually life grows
it's quite relaxing

every different spot along the spine
corresponds to a different singing sigh
a high pitch, for the head, and eye
and a low flowing moan
for the roots
we know as home

hum the spectrum
and let yourself feel silly
spirit willing
that laughter
will heal your heart

...i love you

Consider the way the soul hovers
when out of body
The electrified air
before lightning meets its mark

Consider transit to another realm
in every forgotten dream
The way the mind breathes
when it is consumed in its silence

Consider wells of water
as your very emotions
Consider the rain as its source

How we find ourselves
pulsating in recognition

of our surroundings

Consider the space
between two atoms
See the universe
from afar

Consider the size
of an ant to a star

Consider the first breath one takes
when resurfacing from too much time
spent underwater

Ascension cannot happen 
without
stepping back 
to examine one’s shadow. 


Three steps forward and one step back

is still moving in the right direction. 



To own the present moment and embrace 

without expectation or disappointment;

to integrate and elevate and validate 

in cycles of breath and breadth,

without seeking sated self in other,

is to shed dead weight.

I am free. I am free. I am free.
I have always been 
intimately, utterly myself. 


I invoke hope, and truth, 

and communion and community.

I invoke Love to flow through me. 

I am one with Truth’s Reality. 



There is no fear that binds me. 

No darkness blinds me. 

I am light shining divinely through.

I am a crystallized sun and a holographic moon.



I am the rebirth, and I am the womb.
I bloom. I bloom. I bloom.

Eating grapes from the vine

recumbent, regurgitating anachronistic archetypes

-who would have known hedonism to be so iconic-

repugnant, slow creeping dribble down the chin

such sultry stench still lingers

in the mouth of the pig

a torrent of fluid ‘something’

unclean

as is apt of this ritualistical endeavor

to stow away one’s unease

immaculate indulgence, defying the sanctity of spirit

The universe speaks
and so inlaid is my awe
it feels mundane

The universe loves with unrelenting fire
such wisdom is its light
so delicately, intricately interwoven
is the force, the immensity of everything as one

and I
am but an iota
a speck on a speck
in some unknown place
in the vastness and transit
of outer space

whose voice is allocated to the insignificance of the imminence
of what slaps me in the face

and yet I'm being bombarded with divinity's infinities, subduing me
placating my aggravations and intimidations and fears and anxieties

every mirror image shown
returns me to my heart and home
reminds me who I am
that I am chosen to be me

I am shaken
my foundation breaking
tears escaping
from this love that seeks me

but I am born to be rebuilt
and I am thankful

the pursuit of happiness rarely ever
feels fruitful to me, as a pursuit, anymore
but when it is acknowledgement of inherent joy,
it is abundant and flourishing,
like sunlight, water, or air

Take thee, thy gaze, in wistful, mourning solitude, 

and fix it thereupon a rose in bloom 

and thou shalt see and be consumed

in thoughts of death and interlude 
betwixt
the days of haze wherethrough 

the sunlight, harsh, consumes a baking brain 

a-pulse with pain, and still estranged

in what we call “forever.” 



Yet still, become 

(thee, thy rose in waiting)

whose entreaty and retreat betrays 

the idle mind, the aching heart;

and be that bloom, that efflorescent art.



Drink in the sun and be a part 

of waking day and masterful array, 

of soul drenched verisimilitude.


Whereby the unprimed, emptied mind 

aligns with thy divine spark, 

therein lies the secret: 



It is You 

who shines, who blooms; 

who dies unto Life become again,

through strife and separation, 

Beauty and Unity, and Universe in celebration.



It is Thee, not lost, not blind, 

but free to be and free to find,

to coexist and create bliss, 

through ignorance, your every wish 

begets a kiss with the intimate infinite.



A declaration of innocence, 

of birth, and Truth, 

and Love returned to It.



You are Sight.

Light seeing Light being.

Light Being, 
shining through the Night. 


Divine thing, 
hold tight.

It will be alright.

It seems
I cannot beckon God;
I must remain bewildered

Starry eyed and dreaming
breathing in the mist
with a heavy brain and
all contained within me

Exasperated sighs, relief
such constant bemusement
coloring my senses
tantalizing me with curiosity

I am
caught up
in the searching
unearthing precious gems

Seeing the light through prisms
catching glimpses of the truer forms
whereby reality should turn itself over
lending itself to nought by
superimposed, extant, extradimensional
realities

The shifting, everchanging constant
the fractalline reversal
of the overlay we deem as our precision
yet own as our perception

There is no finding God
It will not come to me
For, without what is not
within was what had been
there is no removal
such, as there is no retrieval

Which way is up in empty space

No weight can bring me down
cause I can lift it!
I’m working out now
and I’ll be bliss-ripped!

Any time I feel heavy
I’m dancing on my feet!
If I must shoulder the weight of the world
I just need more to eat!

Cause I’m getting shredded in my levity,
and happiness is in me.
I’ll do push ups with mountains on my back
and fly with boulders on my feet!

I’m laughing cause this energy
would try to weigh me down.
In my faith and synergy
I have the strength for leaps and bounds.

I’m realizing now that Love is training me
to be a force for good and light,
and flow with Truth eternally.

My gratitude will build me up!
I’m already aligned!
For, every challenge I might face
is a lesson given from the divine

bombardment of the senses
enlightened but inundated
the mind cracks, and self  
is exposed as vacuous

Grasping at open air

ether slipping through
fingers
like rigid wind

out the passenger side window

on the road to freedom


I

thought I was headed somewhere

predestined, and I’d 

find God waiting for me
in a hotel room
booked, with a beachfront view
and two swimming pools, but

our car broke down

in a small town
near a railroad

where my one track mind
resides in a switching station
by a motel 6(66)
betwixt the path to everywhere
and nowhere

colors bleed in memories
like submerging my mind underwater
swimming in an ocean of tears

is it haze
or does the light not reach
this deep?

Sharp memories
pierce the mind
sunlight pierced a cloudy sky
the wind blowing swiftly through my free flowing hair
it would be a lie to say i lived without a care
but you were there
and I was happy

we’d walk
no day too hot or cold
just to breathe in everything
we’d become accustomed to the company
of one another’s languish

though, stuffy it could get
within the confines of each other’s
hot heads
full of pressure

venting fumes into the atmosphere
surrounding our bodies
pressed tightly to each other
almost fusing

now, liquid pale reflections
in a bucket full of silver
when the spirit slips
a viscous wisp

into, white blue
pools of you
i trip and wobble
surface tension breaks

i dissolve
in reminiscence
sunfire reverie
cautiously swallowing smoke
i hold my breath

and seek to saturate my blood
with the fading echoes
of an ancient, timeless reunion
thereupon the rolling ghost

in silent semblance, reflection;
an interpretive dance
of two flames flickering
in tandem



to imitate the birth of the universe
the swallowing of nebulae in
whirling, cataclysmic implosion
we’d inhale the gasping sigh of spirit

how fragrant, once, was emptiness
now I see the difference

Everything is Being, in its most quintessential form. I'm reading The Doors of Perception, and while I disagree with a lot of what Huxley says in the book, the concept of "Suchness" as an ever present fundament of reality is close to my heart. I think the mind, in its folly, approaches that graceful bumbling and stumbling through which the overarching world, too, transpires into Being. Things that seem imperfect are tantamount to the immaculacy of the Pattern.
People see seasons and cycles, years, and births and deaths. They see decay and blossoming. They see in this the liminality of truth, and understand, as we do the contained and confounding grid-work of particles under force forming atoms forming forms, that all things are bleeding at the edges. The problem of identity is age old and often understood to be Oneness. This concept permeates philosophy, religion and culture; we are social animals, bound to Love to survive and coexist. We seek to understand ourselves, to understand the world, to make something of This. It's simple, and it isn't. We're making do with what we have. I think everything makes sense, and we struggle to make sense out of everything, because we are tethered to the corporeal illusion of separation; and I think, that is perfect, too, because it facilitates awareness of connection through reflection.
There is a great, profound truth in that all things are one body, but that doesn't make this any less "real."
Real is just a word; what matters is how we choose to use it.

The present moment is my happy place

and, when I step back and appreciate

all my woes and worries are erased



I’ll simulate the energy of peace

when anger and impatience ravage me

and the world seems chockfull of instability;

because, when I remember to breathe,

I don’t surrender my power to a feeling



Sometimes I find I’m faced with a choice

Life can leave me feeling as if I’m without a voice

All things appear so dull and strange

My heart, aching for a change



And I can choose to lose it;

let my rage consume and guide me

My power, when I abuse it,

unleashes pain I hide inside me



Seeking to subdue, control, or placate

is a futile effort

We must waste our energy 

to weaken what we wish to subordinate

Strength only doubles when we work together



Such is the same with one’s self

Fighting inner pain just drains 

and serves to lessen health

Nothing else remains

and one retires again to rest



I’ll step back, and take a breath,

and remember what it’s like to be at peace;

let my soft awareness spread

from in the deep of me,


and assess

with love, encouragement and patience

any problem that keeps me

from seeing beauty



Because love lives in the aching heart

-in the wandering mind

Love, is what we know, what we might find

It is why we yearn and ache

It is why we persist, in spite,

or for the sake of it



So, 
when I find that irate individual;

my mind and the world in turmoil;

when I can’t catch a break,

I can’t focus, can’t think,

I will remember love

is the nourishing thing

at the crux of being



It is the keystone 

to the doorway to new paths

of consciousness and coalescence

of presence and connection

of Love itself

Once, in a dream that slipped away,

the mustered mind could reach

beyond the stars into the dark



But, in this emptiness;

my passion will not even drip

where it once overflowed



Am I condemned to be alone?

Condemned to never know;

to never speak?



Must I toil on

toward not enough

to live a life called worthy?



I am in no hurry

to secure my arrest

in the throes of unhappiness



I’ve watched the world in blur for several years

and all my tears have dried up long ago


The softest glow of consciousness

was once my light through this abyss

but now, 



I am nothing:



a forceless breath attempting

to guide the wind and fill the sails;


a silent shout unending,

no challenge o’er which to prevail



Without poetry

my spirit begins to dwindle



Hope swindles,

wishing suffocates,



and I care not

—dare not—

to dream

Spiraling

a vacuum in my sternum

drinking in the void
gasping for air in the emptiness



I reminisce of distances
leapt
in instances
kept
in memories
forever, lingering

How heavy can emptiness be?
Who am I who sees
not me?

Who are they

who could not stay
and did they ever know
my disarray?



I am

an erratic notion
of emotion
in motionless

vastness



I am spastic
jerking and tumultuous

in the openness 

of this
cosmic
loneliness

the endless
hindrance
of the intimate
i n f i n i t e