In his presence, I had that
Boy-dazed gaze
That took my breath away
With his infectious sexalicious energy
His deliciously prepossessing magnificence
His lush, stroke-worthy beard

I dived deep into his velvet soul-melting eyes
Chocolate-laced galaxies to revere
Hypnotically luscious charminngess
Smoldering, untouchable, and treasurable

My tall, tasty glass of ***** on the rocks
My ice-cold dope king
My smooth, potent, and imposing Romeo
My astounding mountain
Of unbound crowned enchantingness
My magnetic dreadhead dream king

Sipping on his thugness
Was the hottest rush ever
Drowning in his ocean of macho handsomeness
Was an exhilarating adventure
Waves of sensational sexaliciousness
Tides of divine hotness
That devoured me entirely

He locked me in with his
Thirst-trap passionate sauce
Knocked me sideways
Had me so beyond a thousand
And one lifetimes gay for him

i didn't want to hurt you
so i hurt myself

if someone were to ask me what we just argued about
i don't think i'd be able to tell them
we just were

i had enough when you turned the lights on
i threw my headphones out of my ears
stomped to the switch

i asked if i could turn the light off
silence from your end.

silence from your end. silence from your end. silence from your end. silence from your end. silence from your end. silence from your end. silence from your end. silence from your end. silence from all ends. silence from your end. silence from your end. silence from your end. silence from your end. silence from your end. silence from your end. silence from your end. silence from your end.

i just wanted it to end.

i don't know what came over me
i snatched the black crown i wore for my sixteenth birthday
off of the shelf
and i bolted to the bathroom

i took a sec to admire it
reminding me how sweet and soft i used to be
16 // 19
where did my happiness go ?

i didn't want to hurt you
so i hurt myself

i dragged the sharp combs
down my forearms 8 times
it wasn't deep enough to my liking so--

i lost count.
all i can focus now is about how much it hurts
it stings, i wanted to stop
yet, i wouldn't without the sight of metallic blood seeping through the skin

i didn't go deep enough
i got scared.

i stepped back out, fixed my sleeve, tossed the crown on the ground

are you done ?

silence from your end.
'if you wanted to harm yourself why did you use the crown and not the--'

you laughed at me. you mocked my pain.
which, i have no idea what must've been so funny about it
maybe it's cause i was crying

i was crying because i've never done that to myself. i never felt the need. i had never felt the overwhelming urge to put a fist in your face that instead i chose the urge to take it out on myself. but you laughed. you laughed in my face. when i asked if i could turn the lights back off it was just silence from your end. then you told me i was wasting my own time.
right. i'm wasting my own time.

i just tried to get my things done.            you're supposed to be my sister.

He had me way up in the sky
In his fire-hot, dreamy penthouse
Gulping down shot after shot
Of his crash-hot, alpha nectar
Reveling in his boss-level flavor
Craving another hit of his thugnificent affection

I was weightless in his contagious
Gangbuster affection
So addicted to his breezy, big-daddy passion
Street-slick heat that left me speechless
His hazel eyes shone
Like endless, picturesque mountain vistas

His lips were a luscious confection
Swoon-worthy poetry
A blazing, untamed flame
Claiming my mind, body, and soul
Making me yield to his sizzling *** appeal

His hairy body was an enchanting canvas
That had me so lost, breathless, and bewitched
An unprecedented wonderland to treasure
His smooth, seductive charm
Sent my gayness soaring
To the sparkling stars

I drank lust straight from his thugness
Sipped his daddy Patron
Feeling his thrilling heat
Course through my bones
I lost myself in his magically mesmerizing masculinity

He had that CEO dopeness
That lust-soaked machoness
That satin-slick splashiness
That melt-in-your-mouth mantasticness
That had my rainbow heart
Surrendering to him

He was my top-shelf after-dark liquor
My Hennessy on the rocks
My crash-hot *****
Sliding down my throat
Lighting me up from the inside

I savored his flavor as it lingered in my system
Every move he made was a hypnotic shot
Of sizzling, slang-dripping sexiness
That left me buzzed, dazed, and
Craving for more of his
Hot, spicy, and sip-worthy muscularity

He was my man candy buffet
My powerhouse playground
My beard daddy deluxe
My brown sugar loverman
My hunky platinum daddy
With that Papi sauce
That knocked my socks off

His presence was an electric heatwave
Sun-kissed seduction that slayed my senses
His dazzling smile, his spellbinding eyes
The way he shone so effortlessly
Set me on fire, took me higher
Left me breathless, queer-struck
So hung up on his untouchable thugness

He was my swagger storm
My tidal wave of splashalicious mantasticness
My velvet portal of delectable allure
My sexalicious masterpiece
My debonair treasure
My magic doorway to extraordinary pleasure

My spectacular gallery
Of bossed-up, jaw-dropping attractiveness
My picturesque force of top-tier nature
Flexing breathtaking enchantment

His presence was a mind-blowing shock to my heart
Rearranging my thought process
Making my senses stutter and shudder
With awesome atomic sauce
That had me falling head over heels
In love with his unprecedented prepossessing existence