autumn came around like a drifter to an onramp
there were wet leaves floating in gutters full of rain.
took to walking barefoot around town
melodies from grade school, kicking in my brain.
saw you on the crosstown bus today.
you were reading a magazine.
I turned my face away and I shut my eyes tight.
and dreamed about the flowers that hide from the light on dark hillsides
in the hidden places.

the brakes howled and the bus pulled up near my house
and I got off at the corner.
pulled my sleeves down over my hands, over my hands.
and I wished I was someone else.
and I wished it was warmer.
and when I got home, I thought about you.
like a desperate policeman, searching for clues
and I almost passed out, just then
and I shut my eyes again
headed for the dark hillsides
in the hidden places.

I went down the the gas station
for no particular reason,
heard the screams from the high school
it's football season.
empty lot the station faces,
will probably be there forever.
I climbed over the four foot fence,
I was trying to sever the tether.
moon in the sky, cold as a stone
spend each night in your arms,
Always wake up alone.

I lay down in the weeds, it was a real cold night.
I was happy until the overnight attendant switched on the floodlight.
walking home I was talking to you under my breath,
saying things I would never say directly.
I heard a siren on the road highway ahead.
kinda wish they'd come and get me
frost on the sidewalk, white as a bone
tried to get close to you again,
always wake up alone.

and as i was crossing our doorstep,
i hesitated just a moment there.
remembered the day we moved into our small house
'til the vision got too vivid to bear.

you were almost asleep, halfway undressed
i lay right down next to you
held your head against my chest.
and a guy with any kind of courage
would maybe stop to think the matter through
maybe hold you still and raise the question,
instead of blindly holding on to you.
but we crank up the heat
and you giggle and moan,
spend all night in the company of ghosts,
always wake up alone

a bad dream shook me in my sleep and I woke up sweating.
ran through the dark to the shower,
already forgetting.
tried to think good thoughts.
trying to find my way clear.
let the room fill with steam,
traced pictures on the mirror.

ghosts and clouds and nameless things.
squint your eyes and hope real hard,
maybe sprout wings.

I clawed my way to the living room window,
stood there in the cold.
the last bits of my dream like figures in the distance,
hard to hold.
I thought of old friends,
the ones who'd gone missing.
said all their names three times.
phantoms in the early dark,
canaries in the mines.

ghosts and clouds and nameless things.
squint your eyes and hope real hard,
maybe sprout wings.

I will rise up early
and dress myself up nice
and I will leave the house
and check the deadlock twice.
and I will find a crowd
and blend in for a minute
and I will try to find
a little comfort in it.
and I will get lonely
and gasp for air.
and send your name up from my lips
like a signal flare.

and I will go downtown,
stand in the shadows of the buildings
and button up my coat,
trying to stay strong,
spirit willing.
and I will come back home,
maybe call some friends,
maybe paint some pictures,
it all depends.
and I will get lonely
and gasp for air.
and look up at the high windows,
and see your face up there

call me the running man
call me alachua county bill
call me dripping water underneath the phospher still
call me roy the ripper tearing at your skin
one day I'll pay for this,
for now just let me in.

it's a straight walk home.
it's a straight walk home.
it's a straight walk home.
straight walk home.
through the generation fields
and the ventilation dome.
body after body, alone.

nix your ***** water
forget your resource management skills
I crawl starving down sloping colorado hills
call me roy the ripper tearing at your skin
one day I'll pay for this,
for now just let me in.

it's a straight walk home.
straight walk home.
straight walk home.
straight walk home.
through the generation fields
and the ventilation dome.
body after body, alone.

i'm never gonna turn off the television.
i'm just gonna let it run all night.
i'm gonna plant root vegetables out in the backyard
and come summer i am going to treat you right.

so put on your chairman mao coat
and let me clear my throat.
let's turn this whole town upside-down
and shake it 'til the coins come falling out of its pockets,
yeah put on your che guevara pin
call the troops on in
we're gonna sail through the night sky like a pair of bottle rockets.

i got a great big secret written down somewhere.
i got a rosary to protect us both from harm.
i got a storage locker full of cow figurines
and a laundry list of grievances longer than my arm.
and i am never going back to cincinatti.
all those bridges have burned down to the ground.
i got the jet pack strapped to my back
and i am waiting for you to come around.

yeah, put on your chairman mao coat
and let me clear my throat.
let's turn this whole place upside-down
and shake it 'til the coins come dropping out of its pockets.
yeah put on your che guevara pin
call the troops on in.
we're gonna sink through the night sky like a pair of bottle rockets.

we had our passports out and the kits to fix 'em up with.
and the hurricane lamp cast our shadows on the ceiling.
i watched 'em box with one another like punch and judy.
it was dangerous and delightful.
it was that kind of feeling
when you said you were sure there was nothing standing in our way.
and the lie ran off and hid itself in the alleys all around  the bay.

i saw you knock the lamp over while reaching for the scissors
and i wondered how we'd ever get by without it.
and you fell into my arms, sweet and gentle.
poison in the water.
little doubt about it.
and you said that one of us would be all alone someday.
and the truth of it echoed inexhaustably all across the bay