I wish that we could have done this differently or the way that we pictured it to go but once the film
expires there’s really no way of telling how
the negatives turn out
this is the last time I will tell you that I love you
I wish there was another way to hold a rose without picking off the thorns but if I blister then you and I will forever be bonded, I just hope your roots aren’t too blood thirsty
this is the last time I will tell you that I love you
I wish I could stop asking for wishes to be granted or to not be taken for granted but if my love doesn’t make time seem like an illusion with all the times we’ve spent then what are we doing?
this is the last time I will tell you that I love you.

I chased love into the heart of the city
Somewhere I lost sight of the feel
and now I’m feeling
low again but this time I won’t ask you to save me
I chased love into the heart of the city
Somewhere I lost sight of the feel
and now I’m feeling
low again but this time I won’t ask you to hold me
I wrote a note to myself and stuck it on my bathroom mirror
it read “smile more”
It felt like weeks had passed and I smiled less
like I needed something to make sparks fly and butterflies with exotic colors fill up my stomach once again
but love escaped me
somewhere in the middle of the city
where I gave my heart to everyone and everything who needed it but me
deprived of such a feeling
I wonder
if love escaped you
would you chase her
like I once did
or would you let her wander
wondering if you’d ever come back

it feels like thunder has stricken
you when you can finally
stop being afraid of not being
good enough to validate someone
liking you for who you are and now
you can look in the mirror
and not see distorted images of a stranger
I said hello to myself for the first time
he responded with a smile
he told me to ask this pretty girl
on a date the next time I see her--
so I did
and she said yes
my heart jumped out of my chest
and I felt like all of the chocolate in the world
could never amount to how sweet
that moment was for me
I made a promise to myself that I would stop writing love poems
but how can I not love talking about love
--I am not a hopeless romantic--
I am hopeful
I hope that I can write poems about a girl who I once gave flowers to
and she returns the favor with a garden
growing to be everything we'd
ever dreamed of
this is an ode to the self confidence
that sprouted in the midst of a catastrophe
the only thing that didn't knock me to my knees
so if you ever see me kneeled
that would be my oath to forever maintaining the garden
i was gifted
even if it rains forever

you should see the way
the city glows at night
the bittersweetness of this pollution
takes our attention
from the stars but here I am
writing about nebulas in your
eyes and there is no amount
of light man can create to take
my eyes away from you

how does one find beauty
in himself when every lesson
he has learned has been about
destruction
after all
we find the damaged to hold the most beauty
the lost to be the most cherished
when will it be glorious for one
to lose all of his battles and still
have the heart of a victor
the eyes of a king
the clinch of a tiger
at times -- I like to think --
I don't have to hide my scars
from all of the mountains
I didn't make it to the top of
instead -- I face the currents
knowing I will never drown
in rivers made by those who
would never dive deeper than
sunken ships
what would you do if you were
in the presence of a sailor
washed up on the shore
still breathing--

I used to hope that you wouldn’t forget
the sound of my voice when the only
thing I had left to say was I’m sorry
but what happens when you have nothing
left to be sorry for?
silence.
no longer hearing echoes of apologies
my voice has traveled far beyond
what the eyes can see
all I have left in me is a glimpse of light
lightyears away
even if I self destruct
I will continue to lighten your night sky
all the while never breaking the silence
that fills the air between us

the amount of water you are in
does not matter when you are drowning
even when you are conscious of it
it only takes six inches of water to make vehicles play musical chairs
but whats sad about it is
when the music stops
and your heart is no longer there
there will be no place left to go
you will feel like you are drowning
you must open your eyes and let go of the fear
you must sing your own songs so the music lasts forever
you must learn to swim against the current
yes, love is the healing component
but too much of anything can **** you
i just pray that you've let go before the next tide comes