cs wondering

cs wondering Dec 2013

pull the trigger of a machine gun,
shoot down every living soul
till they lay down dead
in pools of crimson red blood;
I believed I could

pick up a sharp kitchen knife,
stab every beating heart
till its beating fades
to deafening silence heard in cemetries;
I believed I could

every second
every minute
every hour;
I believed I could unleash the fury
underlying beneath my skin
& it was as easy as 1,2,3

but though I believed I could;
I could never quite do
but contain the rage on the tip of a blade

so every night I did
till my skin's a mess of ****** flesh

(c.s wondering)

cs wondering Dec 2013

The prayers of a broken mind

upon the stars,
she wished for her soul to be saved;
upon the clouds,
she prayed for her tears to contain;
upon the Sun,
she begged for her heart to beat again;
upon the moon,
she pleaded for her smiles to return;

every night she did the same
but all that's heard are echoes of silence
till today she cries for her prayers to come true

but who would fulfill the wishes of
a sinful living dead;
condemned to eternal sufferings
& the painful company
of vicious voices living inside a broken mind?

(c.s wondering)

cs wondering Dec 2013

As long as you love me

haunt* my thoughts
poison my emotions
slash my skin
burn my flesh

break my heart
shatter my hopes
bite my tongue
smash my bones

then destroy my soul
for all I care;
after all this hurting
just whisper:
I love you*

& all will be well,
my smiles return

(c.s)

cs wondering Dec 2013

Love me

grasp my soul
catch my breath
touch my rotten skin

& there lies a glistening blade
have it then slice my skin

or carve sweet-nothings
on the tip of my tongue
then throw rocks at my pretty mind

for the horrible pain you inflict
equates to treasured gold

well, at least you bothered

(c.s)

cs wondering Nov 2013

never too late for redemption

feeling the sinking feeling
maybe the next second
i would just plunge
into utter darkness
and be eternally condemned
to the northern areas

the northern areas
cold and lonely
where no one visits
and no one explores

but who knows
maybe my prince charming
would come seeking
for me

and there would be redemption
i would be free
i would be happy
the world would be in colors
everything gets better
life is pretty

c.s

cs wondering Nov 2013

sugar sweet

autumn evenings
falling leaves
& warm sunshine

here we sit
by the window
sipping tea

with me in your arms
and books on my lap
four and a half sachets of sugar
poured into my tea

with a disgusted face
you hold you breath
and drink it all down

oh if i didn't love you
I'd pour it all away
and we kissed
till night
and till dawn

and time was frozen

cs wondering Nov 2013

the end is near

and with the pull of a trigger
the deafening silence of a click
everything came to an end

flames ignited
and it was pure chaos
goodbye world.

c.s