we burned violently in
brisk winters
and grew to ice in
beating summers
opposites do attract

and for a moment i disliked you less ;
the night a crescent moon appeared
next to venus ;
i felt my bitterness defrost
reluctantly
i let the corners of my lips turn up
making me forget how you’d let me down and
to no avail, you keep me on the side
not by yours of course and
i was right once again.

i’m not one to fall into these things
these are for foolish girls who put faith in the stupidest boys thinking that they were put on this earth- to mold somebody’s son into a man (?)
i honestly never thought it’d end- but when
it’s too good to be true
it is.
and to think i’d be the one that you wanted and
don’t tell them all the good i did for you because i won’t look like the bad guy anymore.
but you probably have that covered.

emotions preserved
like peaches in heavy syrup
too sweet
forgetting all the bad
reveling in thick happiness of the past-
take a whiff and i can taste your smile again
-again
a thing that was done already
a safe haven you look back on
i impale a slimy peach slice with a fork
try to shake off excess preserve while it drips
back into the cup
gave me flashbacks of how my
heart looked in your hand
while blood trickled down your forearm like
a melted icee
graze teeth against the
flesh and you’re still here
-still, again
funny words for beautiful fools
things go back to the way they should’ve
been
not how they were and
i pick up the container
knowing that they have grown too rich
-old.

the bus ride to brooklyn that one november night
when i left school and you came to see me
i held out my arm to show you the damage that had been done
you held me and promised me to never do it again and it was comforting to know you cared for the time being
placed your forehead on mine as bright red lights shone through
the bus of children were roudy but the vibe was serene- take me back.

the heavens looking down see
black ominous umbrellas
scurrying about- the animals we are
seeking refuge beneath bodega quality umbrellas
flimsy like the faith i had in you
but may you prove me wrong, loved one
in this cluttered concrete jungle

familiarity
conformity
unoriginal-ality but in reality we
all have places to be and why stand out in the rain?

uninvited water droplets from sky
penetrate pantyhose and
the window plants of overpriced brownstones
the allure of rain by all natural individuals
see nourishment soon to unfold
beauty in baby’s toes stomping in mud
fishing for worms that wriggle with discomfort
gardener of words
rain or shine
she knew how to put a feeling into
gentle yet tasteful prose.

i sit by the shore
with each tide that rolls in
soaking my jeans to the salty waters kiss
i look down at the wet sand that gets pulled to the center of the ocean
by the command of the moon and at least
it has an immovable sense of calmness
but again everything is relative
i take a step in
inviting myself
intruding peaceful ripples to ripples now tailored to fit around the circumference of each leg like pegs in a triangular shaped board at ******* barrel
i shove my fist into the ground and the granules scrape against my knuckles
that’ll sting later..impulsive..
just like we were..
past tense
but we’re grown now or at least we’re expected to be

i take a step further in
i reached for a handful of the wet sand and
smudged it onto my legs
unconventional art
like peoples tags in graffiti and skateboard stickers on the doors of abandoned buildings in disturbed neighborhoods
showing culture in cities
splashes of individuality beyond a zip code
disrupt
organized disorganization
and i’m silently drowning but i see you from the shore
or a figment of my ongoing untamed imagination
you smirked
you still would say that you didn’t mean to- you were daydreaming-
focusing on the scenery than the whole episode- ‘your bad tho- it was your bad’

i begged for my life back
and you shrugged your shoulders and went on walking back to the docks..
i hated you from the moment i contemplated even treading the shore and you knew how the evening would go as soon as you caught sight of me.

nose drip like leaky projects faucet
i speak in poet because you never
liked my writings
the mouth
lips
tongue smacks on gum making sound-
articulating words
speaking abundantly from the heart
for better or worse.
eye ducts and nose lining share the same
mucus membranes and
they drool as i feverishly pen this
my mouth
speaking what i see
withholding all of which i refuse to
my lips feel the way
you withhold truth beneath the tissue layers
drawn doll-like cheeks
a close to perfect wolf
enough to deceive the lambs not knowing
of their awaited devouring in a mere
2.5 seconds.