Regardless of our state of mind.
Regardless of religion.
Regardless of race.
We all love and have lost.

Sometimes, we love while losing.
For others, we must love while
being apart, while fearing the unknown,
yet knowing we can't go there.  

It doesn't matter the story,
the pain is the same.
The wait is agonizing.
The mere fact that we know
we'll see them again
keeps us warm in the coldest of nights.

Being the one who was left,
we replay those last minutes,
or even seconds. We avoid
romantic comedies, walks
through the parks, or candlelit dinners.

As the weeks turn to months,
we simply re-learn how to stand.
We take one step. And another.
We learn to live alone.

Romantic comedies are turned on.
Walks in the parks aren't so cold.
Candlelit dinners still seem corny.
And my memories serve as a blanket.

In the dark of the night,
You're all I can think about.
My heart starts to race,
and I feel like I'm falling.

falling...

I'm tired from living in
memories of our past.
My life is on standby
And I hate it.

Truth be told, I'm scared.
Scared of being alone.
I'm afraid of not being able to breath
Because you aren't here to catch me.

Doesn't anyone understand?
I've never felt a pain more sharp,
yet it doesn't even leave a mark.

You're the only one who truly gets me
And you're the only one who cared.
I can't stand laying here at night;
The darkness alone has me scared.

I need to feel your warm embrace;
A hug that takes the pain away.
When I wake from the worst of dreams,
My dream catcher is nothing but grey.

My knight in shining armor
Is temporarily misplaced
Instead I'm left with a wretch'd hole
In place of an amazing grace.

Please come home soon.

Today is going to be one of those days were I smile though all I want to do is cry.
Why can't anyone understand, why can't anyone see?
Someday's are just plain ol' horrid, and yet I still have to be me.
Maybe I'll scream, I'll scream at the world.
Though it wouldn't change anything, and no one would hear.
The brightest blue of skies can't change to way I feel,
and no one will hold me, no one will care.

Sorrow-Filled Pillows*

Curled up in a ball, my emotions overcome all
I cry into the night, will this ever be alright?
I'm coming undone at the seams, yet this isn't a dream,
How did this come to be, all I want is you and me.

I'm afraid of the dark, of the lonely nights
My mind runs off, and my body's all alone.
10 months is too long, we've been apart forever
All I want is safety, all I want is your warmth.

Physically torn in two, though my heart beats as one,
No one here understands, no one here comforts
except the pillow full of sorrow-filled tears.
How can I make it, how can I stay strong.

So close yet farther away, I want you so bad
Hold me close, and I'll never let go
My fairy tale ending has it's beginning
but it's interrupted by my sadness
and falls
slowly
like
tears.

I miss you.

DarkNightNess(C)olleen