I was so terrified
At my first kiss
I was his first too
He told me I was terrible

The second I only prefer
Not to mention
So sweet
What a shame

So when it came to you
I was petrified
The first time
Our lips touched

So deathly afraid
That I wouldn’t be
Enough/ good enough for you to stay
No one else did,

No one but you

I let my fantasy take hold
I left it in power for far too long
I convinced myself it was the truth
For me as much as you
I let myself believe
That everything done
Was done for two
I let myself ignore the truth
For the beauty of fantasy
Floating in ecstasy
Made up a hope in my mind

But as always
You were there
You looked me in the eye
Took my fantasy from my hands
And ripped it to shreds
I didn’t say a word, I knew
I knew this was coming
The things I once found sweet
Now seem ugly and in vain
As the you I made up in my mind
Faded into truth

Missing someone
Who isn’t gone
Is like having
A hungry soul

Loving someone
Who cannot return it
Is like having
An empty heart

He
does
Not look
like
I
Thought he
would
Death
I thought it was a skull
He should be a scythe
Ah! The glorious scythe
Curved and gleaming
But
      where
       is
it
That vicious scythe
Notherenotherenothere
Where
Why
       is
He
     beautiful
kind
          funny
  wrong
Shouldn’t be
Should be
hideous
But he is wonderful
With eyes bluer than the sea
And skin turned copper in the sun
no gleaming bone
no grinning skull
His only weapon:
the beautiful lies that escape his lips and drip down my ears,
so very like honey
And they’re mine
I accept his embrace

I used to think that blue eyes were over rated
And then I fell in love
Every time
He looked at me
It was like the ocean of his soul cleansed
The filth and dirt from my mind
And all I have wanted since
Was to see those eyes forever
Like glacier ice
They freeze me in my tracks
Keeping me from marking myself
Thinking of how sad they would look if he knew
Like flame
They burn me up inside
Turning my stomach to butterflies and ice
With all his understanding kindness
I see they sky reflected in him
With its storms
And the sun
And, my god, I see the stars.

He called me beautiful
And I wouldn’t have believed him if not
For the hurt in his eyes when I laughed in his face

When people notice
Little strange things
It sets the heart a-flutter
Just a little insignificant thing
An apple, shiny, red, and sweet
Just an apple, that nothing else could beat