Look, these poems, they aren't a apology.
They're a way for me to convince myself that you're gone.
And I finally accepted the truth

You never fell in love with me. Not in the slightest.
Well, I can't say the same thing about me

I never fell in love with you
I jumped

I wish you had never happened to me. I believe that you destroyed my life, yet you have no blame. I trust that you won't tear my life down, if I leave yours. Then again, you've broke my trust forever.
The answer is simple, as easy as 123 or abc: I should leave you, yet I can't seem to. I try and try, but there is so much you can't understand. My life is so messed up, and I can't seem to see the path.

Till the day I die, I will hope for more. I will push my way through the waves of the remains of my life

I have pushed away my friends, and the people I love. All because of one person, who remains secret.

Always trying to keep you warm, when your the sun -1985
It's painful to push you away, yet so easy. I play tug-a-war in my head, fighting for my right to leave you.  

please, let me go

forever and always

Till the day I die, I will love you

i wish that
i could fly
away, away
from this place
from all the hopes and dreams
that circle this world.

i find pain
in those words
as the angel lifts me
from me darkened
perch. she lifts me
into the light
from my pain

from the darkened world
i breath in the light
realizing i was
holding a breath in
for thousands of years

i held my breath
for a long, long time  
now a light engulfs me,
turns me into something new

the dark perch far behind,
i freeze
this isn't me
i am living a life of lies
all these thousands

i grab the wing
on my shoulder
i take the feather
and drape it on my wrist
the red covers my arm

i look and see myself
once again, for the last time
my face pale, eye wide

*good bye