Some people go to church
I go to Tettegouche

With the trees as my church,
Rocks, my pews,
And the multitude of stars as my altar,
I prostrate myself on the mossy ground
Praying to the wind
To please, Keep Me Whole
And as I sit and gape,
Gape up at the stars,
Crack-
Something in me twists,
And I feel the emptiness
Pouring out of me,
Only to be replaced by What will Be
And I Know
I am here
I am whole
And life has Never Been So Good

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HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GO ON LIVING
WHEN YOU'RE THE FIRST AND LAST THING
I THINK OF EVERY DAY

AND HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BREATHE
WHEN ALL I WANT TO INHALE IS YOUR SCENT

****
**** **** ****
**** ****

YOUR LIPS ARE ALL I DREAM ABOUT

ADN I THINK I'M WASTING AWAY
FOR WHAT IS FOOD
WHEN ALL I WANT TO EAT IS YOU

SEE, I CAN'T EVEN SPELL RIGHT
AND MAYBE THAT'S JUST MY CONCUSSION

BUT YOU'RE PUSHING OUT
EVERYTHING ELSE IN MY BRAIN

YOU'RE ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT
AND I'M SLOWLY LOSING MY WILL TO

LIVE

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"Perfect endings are best left to books and ballads anyways"

While I'd much like a perfect ending for you and I
I'd happily settle for a mediocre one,
Or even
one at all

I want you
In whatever way I can
Honestly,
I'm desperate
I'm an emaciated hound,
Begging for scraps at your table
But all I've gotten
Is a kick,
Leaving me hurt and more hungry than ever

I always seem to be starving,
You know
I wonder what it's be like to feel full

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Everything's simpler in the early morning sun
...Less worries, no troubles,
Nothing but you and the rising sun,
Casting its sleepy glow over the trees and water

The flowers are dancing to the beat of the wind
And the coolness of the night,
It's leaving quietly,
With grace and simple love
To welcome in the coming heat like a familiar lover

I am struck by the symbiosis of nature
Everything works together,
Familiar with all that will come
Doing a dance invented millenia ago

And here am I,
In the thick of it all,
Blundering my way through life
All the while wishing I had half the grace of the swaying leaves

I wish I could dance,
But sadly I possess the grace of a baby duck,
Still Learning To Walk

Maybe the roses and ferns can teach me their dance
It seems quite nice.

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A cloudy day, it seems
As though nothing in the world exists
Besides me, comfortable in my house
A sense of almost loneliness. but not
Quite

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I've been in bed for two hours now
And I still can't sleep and
No matter where my thoughts drift they
Always come back to you and
How we fit together so ****
Well and I just really
Think that I'd sleep much better with you here but
Sadly, that's not the case so I guess I'll just
Lay here and dream of your stomach and soft
Lines and hope to god that you're thinking of me
Too because I haven't seen you in more than a
Month and we've barely talked in weeks but
Somehow I can't get you out of my head and
Really,
I either want you or
Silence




But most of all
I just
Really I just want to sleep

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Ah-
I am sad
And it's all because of you

You hate me and you don't even know it.

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I don't know if it's just because I'm tired
But I am
So
Sad

I want to run away with you and kiss your wrists
And run my hands up your stomach,
Circling my fingers around your navel

I want you to sit between my legs, letting me braid your beautiful hair
And putting soft kisses on your neck

I wish we had a secret room
-Just us, nothing else

But you don't even know how you light up my eyes

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You look like the most beautiful painting I could never make,
Like the best poem I could never write,
And you look so perfect that it just steals all my words and I am left
Speechless
Because how could I ever hope to be worthy enough to have someone like you?
If I'm a candle, you're a star
If I'm a rainstorm, you're a tsunami
And I'm a tree, you're the whole ******* forest.

I think the saddest thing is that you don't
even know
How utterly breathtaking you are,
How perfect you are to me
If you saw yourself the way I saw you,
You'd glitter brighter than the frost on my windows
In the morning sun

I haven't fallen this hard for someone in so long.

It *****, because you'll never know.

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I never thought that being happy meant I'd have to be so
****
Miserable

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Scrubbing your locker combo
From my
Skin
Don't want to
Remember you, nope
I didn't want it to end like
This
But I knew it would

Me, walking away with a chunk torn from my soul,
And you, sobbing while your heart breaks
As you desperately
Try to stop me from leaving
But you're so young
And since I'm the older one
I suppose that
I have to do the best thing for us

I'm so sorry
I never wanted to break your heart.

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A pastel colored sky,
Rising up and painting the frost on my windows
A gentle kiss of color;
It's too early yet for the striking reds and oranges of the sun
And so we only have pink,
Pink and light, light blue

A gentleness fills my soul at the sight
The clouds are so soft I could almost -touch- them

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I can think of nothing besides:
You, me, a truck bed, and the stars,
Glittering with the light of millions of years, tears,
Filling the sky with the souls of a billion lovers.

Maybe one day we can be up there too
Maybe one day our love can be on display for all the world to see.

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