Sometimes yellow is light and soft
like a down pillow or a fluffy kitten.
Sometimes yellow is bright and sharp
like the sour taste of orange juice
or  cool like the crispness felt in the first fall breeze
Sometimes yellow can be inviting
like the perfect temperature of a warm shower
or it can be dark muddy and bland
like the taste of blended mashed cold peas
but most of the time
yellow is silent
it is a morning without sound
that breaks
only with the slow introduction of birds
chirping
one
by
one

I have ran
jumped
hurdled
over every obstacle
you have set before me
except
i love you

with those three words
I run
like a track star
because I am afraid
if you catch me
you will see
my weakness
of how I will struggle
to be set free
not from you
but from
how dependent
on your love
I have
become

patience hasn’t been
one of my better
virtues
& if you’re expecting me
to wait for you
like a stranded man
in the sahara
who has no where else
to go


that is like
asking
to wait for death
after the poisonous
bite of a snake

the fear that you won’t return
will paralyze me

for you
are only a mirage
so i
will grasp my own vine
pull myself
out of this quicksand
i am sinking in.

i never was very good
at sharing things
meant to be mine
even as a child
i would hide my things
& guard them
like a pirates treasure
just to keep others
from walking away
with them

not that you
are another one of
my play things

but just the same
i dont want you
walking away
while holding my heat
in your hands

my heart
wasn't’ meant to be
shared and passed around
like an old tired joint
only to be lit
when you want to feel my high
to escape from
your life

i still love you
like an old love song
you never forget
the words to
even though
its been a lifetime
since you’ve heard it.

i still love you
like an old pair of shoes
you refuse to throw away
so you keep repairing them
because of how comfortable
they feel.

i still love you
like my childhood blanket
because in your arms
i've always felt safe & secure

i still love you
like a worn out lp
that you don't care
how many times it skips
cause
with you
my heart is always
stuck on repeat
&
always replaying
my favorite
part
which just happens to be
your name

love.

it’s amazing how simple this four letter word can be
and yet, at the same time
how complicated.

i sit here & listen
to songs about love
& lovers
dedicating themselves
for attentions
unrequited
some returned
& some lost and long gone

& it is in these moments
i think of you

if i could write
the perfect song
i would take the titles
& put it in the words
how
you & i
love

here & now
if only you knew
i have never felt this way
& its a feeling that
i
can’t let go

loving you
means everything

just to be
close to you
makes me feel
like a superstar

& even after all this time
i’m still in love
& wanting to be kissing
only you

if only you knew
i love whats
underneath your clothes

baby come to me
cause you are
all i need to get by

i swore when i fall in love
it would be
always & forever
it would make me
feel
overjoyed
always

& for once in my life
the reason i love
knocks me off my feet
&
i never have to question
someone like you
or
how deep is your love
or if
is this love
i’m feeling

if only you knew
you didn’t come
a day too soon
there has been
no one
anyone else
is unthinkable
& you are
the only exception

if i could take
all this love
& write you a love letter
this baby this
would be
your song.

when we’re old
i’ll have you know
your eyes
will never carry bags

i will never see
the wrinkles
folded in your skin

your hands
will still fit mine
regardless of
the bending & twisting
our knuckles may take

& my heart
will still beat
to the sound of your voice
though it may crack
& be barely heard

old age
will not define us
for we are
timeless
a line, continuous
fluidity

You said I love you
and with just three words
silence crept into the phone
like the aftermath of an tsunami
& caused my shell to crack
like the earth under a powerful wave
& the ocean to drag me out
drowning me
into a sea of proverbial bliss