I close my eyes;
I am so tired.
Mentally, physically,
And of course, emotionally.
I'm sitting here in this box,
Next to people that I kind of know,
That I am sort of acquainted with.
It feels so lonely, really,
But I don't tell anybody.
I just sit here, bored and empty,
Hoping one day it will change.

Please, just,
Stop the clock.
Stop everything.
I would do anything
To freeze this moment
And figure out
How I want to spend my future.

I don't belong here
In this...place.
Somehow I convinced myself
That I did.
Somehow I told myself
I couldn't do any better.
Somehow I lied to myself,
And now I don't know if I can trust myself again.

Walls built so high
Walls scare me, I don't know why.
Maybe because I was told not to cry
And if I did, my feelings were denied.
I stuffed them down, and they learned to hide;
I suffocated them, and they slowly died.

Is it just a white pill
That stands in the way of insanity,
That repels these crazy parts of me?

Is it just a white pill
That calls the shots,
That can be responsible when I am not?

Is it just a white pill
That can save my relationships,
Make people hate me a little less?

It is just the white pill, isn't it?
So who I am?
I always forget.

The medicine's not working
As usual
And the effects are brutal
As my mind makes up the strangest stories
About you, about me,
About anything
That it can grasp,
So paranoid,
I can't relax.

You can do anything,
And you can do it well.
Yet you lie there on the shelf,
And you never ask for help.