Don't ******* reach out to me;
Just leave me alone.
I don't want to go out;
I want to stay home.
I don't want any warmth;
I'm used to the cold.
So,
Let me freeze here until I grow old.

I just want out,
I just don't care.
How am I feeling?
I'm not even aware.
My eyes are empty,
Am I standing here?
Or am I just floating in the air?

Clumsily, carelessly spewing out words
That now I would take back, if I could.
I idolized you, losing my value,
Standing by as your ego just grew.
Now I only have myself to blame
As you look down on me
With no intention of equality.

I feel too much.
I judge too quick.
When I see a flaw, I just pick, pick, pick.
I'm too much of a perfectionist.
It's something I will never admit.
I'm too empathic, I care too much.
It is nearly impossible to earn my trust.
Sometimes I don't know if I'm in love or lust.
Sometimes I just want to give up.

Like a case of fine jewelry,
My vulnerability is on display.
It would be locked up tight though,
If I had my way.

She needs you because she feels,
And when she does, it's all too real.
Conveniently,
You are her fantasy.
Through you she lives vicariously -
The bitter queen of apathy.

Burying all those burdens,
Saving all those dreams,
Sometimes it's much, much better,
More promising than it seems.