In this world,

In this life,

I learned so much.

I learned that I can't trust everyone.

I learned that who wants doesn't fight, resists.

I learned that I don't even know myself.

I learned that there are things that simply are not worth of it.

I learned that pain is something that leaves scars.

But most of all I learned that it doesn't matter how much I learned I will always make the wrong decisions.

Under the rain,

Shoeless,

Soulless.

Her time is busy with loneliness,

And not only loneliness,

But depression too.

But she doesn't want to know.

She doesn't want to know about her so much cuts in her wrists.

She doesn't want to know about her tears in conjunction with the rain.

She doesn't want to know about the floor full of stones that hurt her feet.

She doesn't want to know about the blood that falls from her face because of the punches that she took from her father.

She doesn't want to know about the bruising caused by her run away from home.

She doesn't even want to know about herself.

She just walks,

Under the rain,

Shoeless,

Soulless.

What happens when you stop fighting?

You lose?

No, you resist.

And resisting is much stronger than fighting,

Because in fights is between winning or losing,

And in the resistance you only,

Resist.

"Are you alright?"

They ask as they see me crying in that corner,

I lift my head,

I try not to tremble.

And I answer,

"Yes".

They go away.

You think I'm weak because I cry,

But you don't know the strength that's necessary to cry in front of you.

I couldn't.

I wanted to not look at you,

But it was impossible for me.

And I still don't understand why,

Why you wanted me out of your life.

What did I do?

And why do I have to respect your decision?

Why is this happening with me?

It's killing me,

Not knowing it.

I feel frustrated,

And inside of me there's a pain that I don't know why I deserve it.

I'm sorry,

But I'm suffering and because of that,

I couldn't keep my eyes away from you.

I'm hoping that if I keep looking at you I can find my answers.

The more I tried to not fall in love,
The more I fell in love with him.
I'm still a person,
And he's just my weak point.
He could destroy me if he wanted to.
Actually, I wouldn't mind being destroyed by him.
I love him too much to care about what he does to me.