He used to say
“Give me your love”

“Define love”
Was always my reply

“It’s your body and soul baby, being mine”
He always assumed it was an answer I should know

As night tumbled endlessly
Across a starless sky
I tumbled around
On a bed of pale sheets
Searching for a rhythm
I’d feel deep within my essence

I fell into the moment of
Hands gliding
Hips colliding
Lips seeking
I found empty satisfaction a few times
Somewhere between midnight and 3 AM

I shared my body
But hid my soul
As I dressed
I felt his caress once more
“How about one for the road?” he suggested
As his lips trailed down my neck

No amount
Of body heat
That we generated
Could ever
Warm
My shivering soul

© 2013-2014 Peach

I want silence
7 minutes
Without you in my head
5 minutes
Where the bustle of this so called life is muted
And the next 23 seconds
To just breathe without feeling so much shame

I spend an ungodly amount of time
Washing away your memory
My last shower lasted
49 minutes, 37 seconds
I can still smell gin and your musky cologne
Sometimes I feel clean...almost whole
Today I feel filthy, stained with past violence

Someone said that memories eventually fade
Slowing bleeding away into nothing

They lied

© 2013- 2014 Peach

I.

I wish to be birthed
in reverse.

To recede in slow
motion

back into black
water,

to slide backwards
in a basket

towards the sea.

II.

To be blessed is to slip
without sense,

without sins,

away from this light,
this hum,

this holy hymn
so often sung, a song

that speaks of a new star,
bright born, that burns

with the pressure of sleep.

III.

I see shipwrecks.

Send me home.

Let my basket leak.

I am a cigarette to you.

You lit me up,
and I burned slowly,
and you enjoyed my simple highs,
and got dizzy from my insides.

You began to crave me,
addicted to the sensations I gave your mind,
reliant on the comfort I gave you.

But your fingers began to slip,
and I would burn you,
and I had no choice,
I was on fire.

Then I was nothing but a filter,
and you stomped me into the ground.

But in the end, I was killing you all along.