I believe you cared no I’m positive you did
because the way you used to look at me makes it impossible to mistake it for anything but love
the way your eyes would search me
looking as if they were trying to remember every inch to reference in
the short moments we were apart
your hands were so kind back then
every movement of them was so intentional
and a complete extension of your heart
I remember the trail you followed from my eyes to my feet
the way you breathed me in
the way you completely enveloped me
it eased every muscle every complete inch of me
you had this talent to calm me down
some impressive manner to slow time down
I was so in love...I was so completely yours
I never doubted it for a minute
I hate that I’m writing in the past tense, and I hate that I remember every move you made
because each memory that passes through my subconscious leaves a
reoccurring stinging pain
a cringe and another deep breath to try to expel any
good thoughts of you any illusion that the past is actually the present
I refuse to allow my dormant thoughts of you to reemerge
an endless process to keep you locked in a place where I can't remember
I continue to fail ...and this failure kills me
every second i can feel you gone.
I can feel this hole expanding within my chest
trying to fill the gap you left with an endless stream of comfort disguised with immorality
they last for a moment but they stop the pain
ever so slightly for one moment
a moment of relief in a my world of complacency
I love you more than I can bare
But once again I must remind myself,
those days are gone.

If,
In the days to come
The earth should shatter asunder.
I shall practice leaping until I can
Cross the gap and bring my love to you.
If,
The climates of our individual worlds
Should shift, and snowed in
I find myself surviving an arctic wasteland,
I shall dig myself out,
Trudge across vast distances to meet you
Surrounded by frozen lakes.
If,
The sky should open up
In showers of sentient black lightning,
And hound me underground,
I will brave an electrified death
For just a chance to place one final kiss on your lips.
If,
You should need me in the night
Call my number and hang up after five rings,
And I will come and find you,
And wipe away your tears.
If,
I cannot find you in the hazy stupor of twilight
Know that by dawn I shall place my healing touch upon you,
And you will feel my love, as it courses through you
And all the horrors that lie in wait
Will fade away.
If,
You stay in my arms
I shall love you
Until the sun swallows our bones.

My hands shake
My brain races
My heart is beatng at a thousand paces

My breath is heavy
My knees unstable
My body leaning up against the table

Your lips are soft
Your hands are sure
You act like you've done this before

I think this is right
I think I belong
I think that this could never be wrong

Here in your arms I know what we're about to do
Is the ultimate way of saying I love you.

My darling. My sunshine. My love.
Right now you are across from me,
Eyebrows furrowed, nose deep in a book
With words and lines I will never truly comprehend,
I’ve tried, but they merely appear as squiggles.
And I keep falling in love with you,
With each blink of those gorgeous eyelashes.
With each breath I hear faintly but presently.
With each twitch your mouth dives in concentration.
With each flip of the page,
I keep falling in love with you.
I love you for the little things. The eskimo kisses, the inside jokes, the phone calls everyday, the brief but electric touches, the conversations, the way you remember things I’ve said years ago, how you wrap my hair around your fingers, how “I love you” sounds from your lips.
And as I watch you,
Concentrating. Focusing. Being that brilliant man I fell in love with years ago,
You have no idea I’m writing this.
I smile,
For maybe you’ll know. Or maybe you won’t.
But it won’t matter. Because I love you.

How am I supposed to breathe when you're not here?
Oxygen has not been kind to me.
When the leaves fall and soon enough they'll make a crisp beneath my soles
And the brisk wind will come whistling past my ears pinking my cheeks
Will you still be there in my dreams?
Will you still be my escape?

And then when the snow starts to fall and those leaves begin to fade from sight
When the ochre sweaters turn into fur coats
And the people no longer carry umbrellas but coffee mugs
Will I still wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat
Grasping at the greedy oxygen
Reaching for you
Angry with the futility of my predicament?

Or will the fresh leaves of spring bring relief?

All I want is you,
and right now in my crazy life thats all I know is real and true.
These games we play,
they are bad for my mental health.
So through these words I want to show you
we should be something else.
Something more then just good friends,
something more that never ends.

I give you my all everyday,
you say things to get my hopes up then let me down in everyway.
But I'm still here holding on,
wondering if I'm reading you wrong.
Cause half the time is seems you want me too,
and half the time its like your screaming Fu** you.

I've fallin in love with a man who cant trust
And you know what they say,
theres no us without trust.
No matter how I show my loyalty
it doesnt matter cause Ill always be
the girl you can't trust,
the girl you can't love,
the girl you don't even think of.

But I'm still here hopeing for you too see,
that someday all your going to want is me.