As I lay in the dark, a glow appears to my right
Never seeing this before, I am ready to fight
the bewitching sunrise begins to appear
a ball of fire gets larger and my world becomes clear
While fear is still there, happiness takes over me
as I am overcome by its magnificent beauty

Colors so new, I am at a loss for what to say
the sun simply introduces itself, and we begin to play
we dance and sing in the lovely heat
I lose myself in a warmth so deep
I find a home under its comforting rays
we laugh for hours and the sun promises to stay

I never want to leave now that my world has changed
light is normal, though it once was strange
but suddenly I sense the end of our time drawing near
as my glistening sun starts to disappear
I beg in not to go, it's lonely and dark
"If it's meant to be, then it will" was the suns only remark

Our promises faded like the colors in the sky
lies blinded my soul like the light in my eyes
The glowing gets smaller as the sun leaves
and long with it are pieces of me
Stuck in this place, now lost and alone
Wishing for that sun, wishing for my home

I should be okay because life was this way before
but now, on my soul, the sun has burned a sore
and knowing the warmth I hate the cold
you can't miss a story if the story is untold
Maybe the next sun will not be as warm as the past
I can only hope for a temperature that will this time last

I stare at blank pages and laugh at our similarities
Emptiness
A blank slate could be something admired
But what is paper really worth without some sort of marking
Whether they be markings of seemingly irrelevance, marks give meaning
But empty is a cup filled with nothingness

My pages may be blank but they are not clean
Them
They each have left their marks just not with ink
My book is mine but they have added in their part
Marks, sure, I can hide at first glance
But glances become stares when the story is intriguing enough

In what appears disorganized damage, there is an order
First
She took my book in her hand without asking
Skimming through the pages of unauthorized territory
She leaves behind a crinkle on every page from her careless game
But I suppose the book is my responsibility

What might be worse, I handed the book to the next
Second
We wrote together the present and the future
Forever leaving an ambivalent past
I don’t know if she ripped pages out completely leaving a hole
A gap where promises once were

She may have simply removed the ink
Magic
A simple flick of the wrist and the words are faded
How can a page filled with hidden words hold more emptiness
I try to begin to write over these pseudo blank spaces
But my body is crippled from what I see as I stare, and I laugh

Sometimes the pressures of the world are too much to handle
the weight just crushes down on you
and you don't know if you can get back up
With every push upward you gain an ounce of hope
but your foot slips and you lose your grip
you want to scream in pain
curse the Lord's name in vain
but nothing but empty air leaves your lips

You want to disappear inside your soul
cut out the wold and attempt to fix your gaping hole
but don't let them see you without a smile on our face
Trick them into thinking you believe you are more than a disgrace
or that you don't feel small
build up that wall

Standing at the corner of lost and lonely
I wish I could leave my own mind
pack my bags and throw an "out of order" sign on the door
you meet someone who gives you hope
but deep down you know hope is as far as you'll get
"she's out of your league" you're right
so lay down and act like it doesn't bother you tonight

Punch out a few crunches
hope the sweat will wash away the insecurities
because they told you it would make you feel better
both on the inside and out
so why not use the chemicals to scrub your brain

You feel dark and twisted
and that the poems you write should have a happy ending
as if it will make you feel better
but not every story has a sunrise
you can only hope yours does

At this moment, it's our time
At this moment I'm allowed to think you're mine
We can joke, laugh, and smile
But I know that just in a little while
I'll stand and watch

It's just about that time I fear
The time I realize soon you'll no longer be here
And I'll have to choke out the word "goodbye"
As I use all my strength trying not to cry
Because soon I'll stand and watch

So now it's time for our famous hug
You squeeze me tight so I feel all your love
Now you get into your car and drive away
I open my mouth but I don't know what to say
So now I just stand and watch

I watch you drive down the street
As the world spins violently under my feet
The car slowly goes out of sight
In my heart I know something's not right
But still I stand and watch

I'll stand and take the blow
Only thinking of how I never wanted you to go
The hug lingers and I know you're not to blame
I know you feel the same
It's more time we wish we had
So I stand there and whisper "I love you dad"