Travis used to pick up pebbles
Held them in his hand looking
For gold... Or crystal, smooth sides
Or even one with a strange color
He wanted to throw them upstream
So he could watch his collection
Bounce before it drowns
Now I've been collecting pebbles
Since he shot one bouncing farther
Than the heat could bend the light
I learned religion that day
I woulda started a church on the shore
Hiring monks to unravel the secrets
Of his backhand throw,
I mean if I could even pick up
The pebbles anymore without
Watching half drip through fingertips
Just to watch them drown, thudding
Into last years promises,
I swear if I had a pebble for every
Promise I made to my future,
I'd be forced to build a wall
Between me and every half-thrown
Analogy ripping your mind
Out of the moment and hello
This isn't a Poem, this is
Uhhhhh....
Just words in a line and so if that
Interruption wasn't enough to
Send you                      Running
Then you're stronger than the people
Disappointed by my inattention to details
If I really had a pebble for every
Promise I've ever broken I'd do my best
To pile them up in such a way that the right
Light reflects my true intentions
That wall, is a scarf, to keep you warm
All the nights you had to cry yourself
To sleepless tossing when I should've been
There. To wipe away your tears and
I'm sorry.. But I'm gonna have to leave
You in that bed a few more times I still
Haven't learned how to count sheep
who can't jump over that wall we built

Adjustments to life's seat belt slaps
Can sometimes create a bumpy ride
So don't forget to strap in your
Neighbor before yourself, because
There may be some turbulence
So I **** well hope you don't say the word:

                                BOMB

Or expect the fires of hades to
Come for your *** walking beside it
Barefoot and friendly, just askin
For a smile, but these days
We both know a smile is at a
Premium and lord knows the
Dollar don't go as far as
It used to.
  So roll every penny
And sleeve and keep
Notching your seatbelt,
You earned it kiddo,
Just don't go fallin asleep
At the wheel or you'll
Drift into cowfields and
Hay bales and maybe
See something beautiful
For once in your
Smog-filled, street-lickin' life.

These broken lines clog my recycling bin and
here I am sorting through the rubble
You're feeding me overchewed gristle
remnants of dead sheep from tired centuries
Oh god! but that excited look on your face!
those creases on your eyes that shout
"I'm so ******* excited to feed you ****!"
But I'm fleeing from the table
shading my eyes from your blinding obsessions
My gut is trembling from a primal need
Give me fresh meat! let me sink my pointed teeth
they're being blunted on your gristle
I can't keep eating this ****
I'm choking on my *****.
Smelt your silver spoon and dig a grave
let's put that poor sheep to rest and
dance on the mound
Rain permeating my new expressions
Dropping your gold coins on the grave
I'm on to sow some beans.

Twist my arm and break my back,
let the salt and the brine Float into my senses
and the broken particulate spread into my toes.
Dig that oily mass into my flesh and deteriorate my cells
dissolve my ether
ooh
let the howl of your generators flush over the break of waves
and drill into my eardrums the winds of my mountain.
I just want your purple, smoky blues without
the greys and the sheen of oils on my skins
spread over my feathers
drowning me in my own element.
You're fire, metal
warped transitions of nature flexing your synthetic muscles in my face.
Sorry, bro, I'm just not into that.
Turn around,
take your auto-clogged
smelted bull to the sun and
incinerate yourself
I'm tired of your leering, thirsty eyes.
I'll give you water till you drown but
you'll still drink you greedy whale.
at least whales know how to keep the balance.

Something that stopped me in my tracks
was the weight of the air around me.
we're all sitting in traintracks on a baseball field
and we dont see the cars driving past
but we can **** well feel them
the balloon of pressure
air sprinting away from the grill of a two-ton hunk of metal
glass
rubber
knocks you back just in time to get hit by the train you never saw coming.
jump off the tracks and dive into my opened chest
the sea is swelling and it will swallow you whole
You're just standin there.
You look stupid.
Wonderin' why..
Why, man?
be the tide and raise these storm waters until they crash your levies
leveling your time-built empire
your stockades made of billiard *****.

I don't expect you to read this and understand a word
I don't expect any miracles or revelations to come pouring
from your crystalline cranium
I just expect for my broken bones and shattered moans
to be audible to the naked ear
I don't want you to come crying to me
or even call me your knight in shining armour
all I ask is that you see you've always been the rider
and I'm just begging to be your ******* horse.

But you'll never see me for what I am.
that **** witch used your resonant frequency
and now youre in pieces
and your veil is sewn
you'll always see me in reflections of your past
goggles of your mother's addictions
but I swear I'm just sitting here holding out my open palm
even if all you see is my *******.

Man, I'll stitch up your torn up mainsails
if you'll be my captain
hell I'll even steer the boat if you want
but **** I cant work with you if youre sailing on the opposite ship
I mean come on
I'll let you sink those grappling hooks into the **** deck
swing an army of men onto my boards and beams
and you can take every rope, wheel, anchor, reel
I just ask that I get to be your prisoner
because GOD KNOWS thats all i'm good for anymore

but ill always be hereforyoui promise.

Go ahead and lock your gimbal
Hurtle that spaceship
Right into my stable space station
At least I installed shock absorbers
But ****, keep running that engine
And you'll be crashing into me
At escape velocity
Till we're both hurtling from the solar system at the speed of light
(Different directions I might add)
So you keep burning that fuel
And see how long it takes
For me to lose this game of chicken.

Slither into your
Broken moonbeam of
What last
Tuesday couldn't
Bring past your door

I came all over your front porch
And you had me wailing at
New sunrises over a black
Hole had set without your
Permission my love has no eject
Button and no way of mistaking

The eve of Zeus' misogyny
Married nought a cloud less
Than the bolts an imbalance of
Electrons smacked on my head
Tracing web-like scars down my
Flinching arms
Leaving me wide open.

every day i see your grinning face,
scowling back at you,
i push the inevitable away,
the extremist christian preacher,
trying to "save" the impressionably intellectual college crowd,
only doing it for the rise of drawing a riot,
on the concrete canvas,
illustrating muddy red abstractions of chaos,
bowing to overlording masters of extremity,
in hopes of burying **** faces,
in prismatic drippings of paint-slathered sand,
eating bland beatings of faint clippings,
yet you stand there,
emasculated in your chronic musings,
without one permeated prism,
embedded in your studded jacket,
is your acceptance of how you could be.

welcome to the world
milk larder
atlas killer
welcome to the universal mind
your presence has not been anticipated
no bells rung at your birth
but the cosmos shook about a
nanometer
from the force of your creation
spectacular birth even if your arm
is weak
doubtless your good looks will make up the rest
...
no luck there?
you're the down-trodden,
the eclipsed lantern,
the face in odd angles,
wearing the weight of someone's unconditional
..
Lust
but deep in your caved chest
your heart is beating the tribal song
of a jet launching for the sky
the way you felt when you switched wheat
for rye
the turn in your cerebrum going from gluten
to sigh.
but even as the birds coast beside
your jet-stream heart strings
I see your hesitation glistening
shivering at the start line from your magnum opus
and you are shattered
growling lioness courage running from the cannon
exhaust that running lion
until she's panting on her back
sweating vapor into the atmosphere
and you remember that all along
you have been the soulmate of the intangible
you just forgot
and you forgot again.

this space is a vacuous hole in which we all must drop
our possessions and the beats of our hearts must cease at your command
because you know that every drop of ink that spills from your veins
is a masterpiece
every inch of steel that grows from your head is an architectural wonder
and yet
i see neither beam nor paint
i see the dent in your left, third, right, left tooth
i see the stain in your boot
i see the blemish right next to the freckle in your slightly bowed arm
and if i saw anything else
i forgot a moment later
because
i
*******
hate
you.

would have known her in a crowd of a thousand
******* and genitalia had been carved with elaborate care
these are the gods who have been forgotten
their last priests died without passing on their secrets
ideas are more difficult to be killed than people
like pebbles dropped o by o into a deep
                                    n      n
               ­                     e       e  
                                  w  e   l   l
they navigated the green sea
by the stars
by the shore
when the shore was only a memory
the night sky overcast and dark
by the faith
the sun as distant and cold as a dull silver coin
ice crystals on the asphalt
glittered like diamonds in the morning sun
the world in the mist had become a pencil drawing
executed in a dozen different grays
when the shadows are long
that is my time
and you are the long shadow
the moonlight drained colors into ghosts of themselves
take the leap from the leafless
and dance on nothing until the dancing was done
we travel a spiral where
the quickest way is sometimes the longest
at night you're rubbing yourself against wormfood
slick as a snake in a barrel of butter
patches of white against an iron-grey sky
each a lacework of fractal art
touching your tongue with cold and winter
kissing your face with its hesitant touch
before freezing you to death

incogitable is the question
you've asked yourself
since you could form
thoughts dense enough to grasp
quandaries these daily citizens
are encouraged
"not to be contemplated"

unthinkably aware of your surroundings
that you tend to notice cracks
in the side-stomped concrete
three-point-five seconds before
my ankle ever twists

and yet, your eyebrows carved canyons
in sweaty, porous sediment
caked onto the blood-fed silkscreen
stretched below your hair

you didn't believe me when i told you
cameras will litter the city streets
innumerable greater than the lampposts
illuminating your view of my sprained ankle
(you missed that one, by the way)

you honestly believed that everyone
thinks about everyone else
because that's what you do

but boy, I gotta tell ya,
you are not like anyone else
you're the high-flyin pilot
star visible to the naked eye
caught behind the crescent of the moon
yet still shining through
and some may even come close enough
to brush heat waves you emanate from that hot heart

unfortunately, your perennial denizens
rely on waxen wings
crashing anxiously homeward
to moss-laden paradises
they make up
twisting neural networks into bundles

here i recline
pierced through the retina
held fast iron-gripped heart
legs tight and fingers licked
incogitably cognizant
of each
and every
answer
           || Restricted Access Memory ||
will not permit to ponder

ponder for longer than
a second anyway
but a second is all you
need to receive
seventeen-thousand-four-hundred-and-forty-two
percent of your daily value
of vitamin E




(that stands for Enlightenment, people)

snowflakes burn more than the dog leash,
you told me to hold back in nam,
and if you think,
that a troll is a unicorn,
then, I'm sorry, my friend,
you've never seen a unicorn before..
on the other hand,
I have seen a unicorn,
soaring across the sky,
morphing from man,
to wolf,
to animorph,
and landing in a cascade of rainbows,
and one more thing,
if you think,
that you know it all,
well, there are wonders out there that you have yet to see,
and if you think you're right,
about anything,
then you've never met a unicorn before.

this one is for the girl,
the one whose presence in my life,
rings like the screams of thumbtacks in my shoes,
whose words bite at my ankle,
the crab that cannot find another place to pinch,
and you know,
the moment,
when she walks away,
her *** brings my eyes to her,
quicker than a magnet attracts a compass,
because, we know, that no matter how the trees fall,
and the ice freezes the locks on our doors,
we'll always have a home to share in each other,
yeah, I can't walk a straight line,
without worrying about the pebbles in my socks,
but I know, the moment I get home,
you'll be there to rub my feet,
and I've learned, that when I see her body,
shakin' in the way that she sways it,
the heat between us is something of a fusion reaction,
two different elements, coming into one,
creating waves of thermal radiance,
oh, but the way her tongue lashes me,
the master, whipping her slave into working shape,
my body quivers and collapses,
and at her feet I'll lay,
a broken heap,
and somehow, when I look into her eyes,
the way they stare into my soul...
nothing ever happened,
and my body has climbed the ladder of evolution,
there I stand in herculean brilliance,
she'll waltz over to me,
swaying those..
****** hips,
and I'll wrap one arm around that flawless waist,
and we're one,
and the world is nothing.

from the ground, the earth seems so far around,
climb a few rickety stairs,
you see, distance just gets shorter,
seems like the distance between us,
the chasmic, drastic drop in pressure,
floating in the air separates two mountains,
remove the pretenses,
smash the awkward in the gallbladder,
there is nothing removing one from all,
realize now, we're all so tall.
this place is just a stage,
a stance to find your feet and grab your heart,
everything we've ever done is a masterpiece,
and on this thin needle we can see miles,
but not the reason for our smiles,
empathy is wasted on those,
when you can't read your self,
so take this heart of mine,
and hold yourself tight,
because this is about to get tremulous.

my innocence flutters in the breeze of your gaze,
as I dream away the haze of your face,
the lights dissolve the velvet of your ear,
breaking my porcelain lungs, time erased,
all I demand is a constant place,
dropped down the chasm from your leg,
to your heart,
where polaris shimmies ****, yet alert,
in the way our eyes can't adjust to stare into the sun,
and the way our fathers have a hard time looking their sons in the eyes,
telling you that everything will be okay with a hollow heart,
but I will tell you now,
all will be okay.
even if you must pull cubes out of
paper circles and dance barefoot
on flying volcanic rock, it will
be okay.
you know tomorrow is only a day away,
if you recline in your rocking chair,
begging for a sooner arrival of the next,
I'll sing you a broken prayer
tearing you farther from the air.

Amorphous blobs of yellow and white
Fly by the candle sticks in the hall
Halls melt hourly when they meet light
Fire of the candles makes paint fall
The blue mixes with the yellow
They make a mellow green
The bowls holding the wax afloat
See the world through a cello screen
The man in the middle glares with watery
Eyes on fire in purple airs
All this time the song keeps playing
Endless, toneless, knocking
on, off, on, off
the music never stops
till the hall melts from the candlesticks in the bowls catching the wax through the cello screen with the green mellow light, but even the man in the middle with the flaming watery eyes cant stop the music from throbbing its beat, drilling into our ears, you can hear it can't you? I can see it, silly you
Until I see the blobs of yellow and white.
Good bye, I'll see you in the morning light.

In these lines are a forgotten code,
Your dreams of yesterday move me further,
Through the next part,
The next line,
And I just keep stumbling,
Across these cracked boulders,
And knobby branches,
And yet you come for me,
And me for you,
******* the new day with broken paws,
Screaming at the stars,
With gaping maws,
Our eyes,
Shut,
To the morrow,
Yet always open to yesterday's whimpers,
I bring this to you,
The Cold War enigma,
So you may decode some piece of my encrypted soul,
So a minuscule part of me,
May make it through to you,
But you'll never quite understand me,
Because through experience,
We can only ever understand ourselves,
And I love you.
But perhaps I'll have to wait one more day to see your crying eyes.

The problem with the tribe these days,
they pay too much attention to the burning man,
driving out to remote desert islands,
to watch the note crumple under the pressure,
flying over mountains to witness their transformation into a volcano.
I’m your herbal blend and your medicine man,
you see, I emerge from unharbored islands of survival,
I come with a vision, blinded to the tribe,
and my heart and legs ache to present it,
your smudged, trembling hands will reach out as I see it,
and your eyes broaden as I hand my dripping liver to you,
no, not my heart, hearts are just.. so cliché.
You can have my liver, I wont be processing anything unclean,
but in a moment, the tribe will shove moons,
oils, chemicals, yellow, green, blue with acid-stained flourescents,
so you may need the second filter.
But, no matter what they put you through,
you’ll always be that northern light,
the aurora borealis is just the reaction to too much energy in the atmosphere,
meanwhile, you take the worst, and you turn it into something beautiful,
colors from amethyst to ruby cruising lightspeed through my aura,
and there you stand, covered in the filth of the tribe,
and the sheen of authenticity shines through the cracks,
soon enough though, there wont be any more tribes,
and when the earth splits, there will be molten lead,
sprinkling space with shining, obsidian stars,
You and I will stand on the moon to witness the explosion,
and laugh as we walk away into the next creation.

Treating life as a means to an end
will only make your death come sooner
a chronological record of each broken tailbone
but I guess some people just like falling on their *****.
Personally, I like growing my tails
using them to jump a little higher
maybe that’s just me, though.
Yet, if you’re always surrounded by the blackened earth
you might have to get your hands a bit *****
climbing from that unhandled abyss
just dont forget, master colombus, that the land of the free
is just a place in your memory
Now don’t go around waiting for me
I’ll come to you
scrambling through single-pixel tunnels
my expression is a blur shifting constantly
but dont you know, a black hole couldnt reverse my inertia
I’m bound to you with something stronger than gravity
I’m a sound wave on a direct path
I’m found without weight
you’re mine to find, can’t you feel my mind?
If you’re the waterfall, then I’m the river
taking each crash of your waves
it reminds me of this song I used to know
about how we’re expansive and massive
and surrounded by infinity
suppose that makes us nothing, just passive
So as the bright and shining moon,
you stay on your ellipse,
and I’ll drag the sun into you,
and maybe our collision will create something new
because in a universe thats collapsing anyways
lets take this synergy and carry through.

I can stay on the phone with you for hours,
As the sun falls and the buds close
Not a word ever heard.
A code we learned and soon forgot ever stood for something else
No, the dictionary holding more meaning than the thoughts in their feet
I threw down the phone
Screaming my mind into your ear
But you never received it.
I pulled your picture to my face
Shoved my wisdom through gritted teeth
Deep into your dilating pupils
And as your eyelashes caught the light
I knew you heard me.
Finally understood me
Staring back at you,
I saw the gleam of your soul
Pouring through your crystalline eyes
And finally we knew everything
And we died in each others arms
Connected by the forehead,
Buried, locked in a gaze.

swells and swells of relentless flags signalling the come of tomorrow,
flows through lamps dripping in the consideration of the crow,
lower than the door can yet the deer find a home.

revelry of the moonshade,
when the petals fall,
teas make the best medicine,
blooming buds and rising suns,
aching along the shore,
the old is nevermore

growing burdens perched on weary shoulders,
masks torn asunder,
gaping faces staring nakedly back,
hearts beating behind skeletal cages,
given as gifts to scorn the sages,
church organs beating in skin of palms,
abruptly ended clanging clash,
striking the keys one by one,
hoping one note would flash the lights,
pump blood back in

broken thoughts blister as the sun itself beating upon your untouched beds of sand,
your love is not washed away in the sand,
yet after years and years of waiting.. it seems even the lifeless have a tomorrow,
bring the moon to the earth and smash the rocks upon the glass,
may we drink in revelry,
die in breaches of the daybreak,
when the soulless whispers of the day passed reach your beating ears,
may we never part.

Roasted shadows,
Maws opening upon,
High-grace bones,
Your face glistening,
Moist memories of days past,
Pulling the rope,
Futures intertwined in hope,
Gracious hosts don’t mend,
Not the ghosts as they,
Float along the coast.

time has always been short,
knocking on our doors.
winds converge,
long lost brothers,
flow about eachother,
honoring time lost.
nay time grows,
shorter still,
deadline is here,
no time to meet.
off you go,
without saying good bye.
a thought hangs near,
words, “three months.”
how long truly,
can three months be?
lest we die before it comes,
we shall know the length,
soon, every detail.
yet, I yearn to bear witness,
a single time,
on your face.
time goes on,
I will miss you,
hoping daily,
the time gets shorter.

though perhaps small,
to me,
it is all,
without those syllables,
ringing in the dark,
the light within,
matches that without,
the words mean all,
petty sounds,
matters not how small.

every day,
holds a surprise.
every sigh of the wind,
a gift.
nay, when you least expect,
the world itself,
may reach to embrace.
you find in the hardest times,
there’s a glimmer of light,
possibly,
a glimmer of hope.
out from the dark,
the one you care about,
will care back.
standing there with no hope to move,
your light stands in the dark.
beckoning.

oasis
waterfall of lava,
flows over me,
as I walk through the day,
the ledge remains,
over Head,
steaming scarlet sludge,
falling in arrays,
of patterns around me,
everything becomes so,
Hot.
I flinch and cower,
from the heat,
radiating,
there you stand in front of me,
throwing tendrils turquoise,
through the flame,
enveloping me,
I reach to you,
my one source of calm.

isolation,
seems as desolation,
the best in la vie,
you just can’t see,
world indeed seems bleak,
alone on the peak,
what is the point,
of being good,
when you are the only one,
the virus without food,
the urge to run.

Have you ever asked yourself what your mind sounds like?
The cathedral of the orchestra?
When I first began,
I remember the end,
But in these forgotten hallways of our minds,
I embrace the trembling face of what was,
I'm talking about our future,
And your yesterday..
I'm talking about the shiplights on the horizon of those four-letter sounds,
Screaming, "what will be?"
But staring us in the face,
Day by day is this pounding answer of we.we.we.
When the drums rattling the shaking hands of the spirit-bound minister are trumpeting into the sky can we truly tell what tomorrow ever was meant to ask.
Excuse me mister and excuse me sister,
I stand here on a precipice of inspiration,
A fountainhead of thought.
In the morrow,
Less lives lived in sorrow,
More lives lived in the lights of days borrowed.
I gathered my shriveling hands under the meat of what was,
Only ever begging for the daybreak to come sooner,
I peer over the melting stretches of unbroken earth,
Screaming for a new day, I say, "who? Am I."
Bless me with your rotten future and plague me with your desperate heart for in the sunrise,
There are no questions.
Only ceaseless observation.
Bring me yesterday's whispers and whimper into the future with a dying heart,
The day is come.
And yes.. Sometimes I do ask myself,
Why was I born into this?
This dying fate of don't ask why.
Such naked sight and active fire,
Drumming out rhythms of my central chord,
Tapping and mapping,
The things keeping the man up in the darkness,
Is only the very echoes of his own mind,
Do you hear anyone else in that chamber?
This beat is dropped for your sound.
The rippling dribble of speech which I pull from the depths of canyon beaches forgotten,
I only ask to bow to the doors,
The hollowed-out floors,
Years passed of sleepless dreaming,
So in the morning light that I may squint out a new sight,
A new sound,
A new.. Touch.
For all we ever were,
And yes, all we ever will be,
Is everything.