Dark cold night air fills my lungs
I press on down this road
I have no clue where it goes
My feet hit the pavement
Freshly wet from the storm
The air feels wondrous as
it brushes my hot face
And dries my wet tears away
How can this be me
I want to forget it all
I want to stay forever gone
And not come back
I feel lost as I grasp for something
Anything to keep me going
I just wish someone could hold my
Hand through it all so I dont have
to be alone through the worst of it
After so much pain and hate
Is it worth the tears and blood
What about the others I've hurt
With my own actions
I run faster and faster
But just then I look back
To see my redemption
They came to save me
From this pain eating at me
I am so far gone now
Is it possible I think
I am Gone and trying to come back
And there they are to save me from myself
I don't need to self medicate
Or slice through my pain and memories
But how can i burden them with my problems
They refuse to let me go
I may be gone but
I look in all of your eyes and
I see so many reasons why
I am trying to come back

I hear silent whispers in the wind
“Take my hand and walk with me
And maybe one day
You can come
To see what
I see”
What nonsense is this
All I know is what I will come to see
Will be the shining light of the sun
As the night comes to an end
The bright sun will come up
So I wait for that light to guide me
After the long dark night
But upon morning there is no shining sun to greet me
It is hidden by foreboding black storm clouds
Oh rain cloud oh rain cloud
You can be so quite yet so loud
You know me better than I know you
But I look to those clouds and only see beauty
For they bring rain do they not
And rain will wash this ***** earth
And moisten the cracked dirt
With this luscious rain it brings life
To the dead ground
This rain reminds me that through all of the pain regrets and mistakes
You can still be washed anew
Just watch the rain to wash it all away
Forget about yesterday and let the new and beautiful begin
Open your heart to what you never expected
Maybe something magnificent will happen
You'll never know until you try
Oh rain cloud oh rain cloud
You can be so quite yet so loud
You know me better than I know you
But I know that I am still here
But at the moment just hidden away
in this shell of a person I have become
But like those clouds
This shell will soon be gone
And the sun inside will burst out with
Shinning and beautiful light
Just like the one that sits inside my heart
Oh rain cloud oh rain cloud
You can be so quite yet so loud
You know me better than I know you
Time will bring this friendship to a close
But only for a short while
Until then I will remember the lesson
I have learned
Beauty Joy and laughter are not
Always going to be shinning brightly
Nor will they always be loud
Sometimes they are Muted and dimmed
But it does not mean that they are gone
Now I can say those far off distan whispers
Were from my own heart
Just hidden away
Like I was that long ago day
Take my hand and walk with me
And maybe one day
You can come to see what
I see
Oh rain cloud oh rain cloud
You can be so quite yet so loud
You know me better than I know you

Do you not see that I am still standing here
How long do you think I will wait
Patience is my strongest suit
But it seems you are taking
More of it than I have
I am trying to make this work
How is it I have quit you
But each time I do so
You come back
Begging
PLEADING
For one more chance
ONE MORE CHANCE
How many “One more chances”
Can a girl give without
Bleeding dry from all the wounds
You've caused
Is this just a game you play
I have convinced myself it is
But If you want the truth
My heart can no longer take the abuse
But I feel my soul would die without you
In this sad creation I have made around you
I told you in the beginning
That I was fragile and broken
That my feelings were hard to express to others
But somehow you opened me
Healed me
Loved me
And
Left me
So this is for you
From me
Saying good bye
I know I will recover
And survive
And one day
Remember
That you were the one
Who saved me from myself
So thank you
But I can no longer go on
Torturing myself
It is time to find a love
That will make me whole
Good bye Dark Angel
Good bye

Can you tell me whats real and whats my imagination
I feel like I been dreaming all this time and then I find
That It all could be true,
Yet it all could be made up
Who am I
To judge what is reality
And
Define that which is make-Believe
I cant grasp what has happened here to me
And you
Were you
Are you
Reality
Or
Just
A
Figment of my imagination
I just don't know anymore
Maybe one day we'll better understand this place that we reside in
Maybe you will be real
And this love that's grown here will be real
But
What
If
Its not...
What do we do then
How does it all work then
And will the thoughts that we question
Ever be
Answered
Then how would reality be separated from dream and imagination
But is it separate now
Do you even exist
What about me
Am I sane
Or is this
What my
Brain
Has
Done
Engulfing everything that ever made sense to me
Maybe I will understand it someday
Someday is an awful long time away

A distance far beyond my youthful knowledge
Yet a concept in my grasp of understanding
The words were senseless until you put meaning to them
My life if full
My heart is warm
My soul content
Not a star in the night sky shines as bright as I
No single person knows
How you make me feel
The one I want forever and always
Someone who’s heart is big and soul is kind
A man who stands his ground
But never plays around
This is you I’ve found
Never again
Shall I love another
As I love you
Through thick n’ thin
Again and again
My dear don’t ever fear for I’ll never let you go
Without letting you know
My heart is yours
You may do what you please
As long as you see
That you are a part of me
As I am a part of you
I'll never be lonely
As long as I have you
My One and Only

Time, what is it really.
How can we truly measure it.
A minute, could be a moment with you.
An hour, could be a lifetime missed.
The lines of time we weave are unreliable
Unattainable
UNFORGIVING.
One wrong step
And there is a wrinkle in that line
Forever
You can’t fix it
You can’t forget it
It will always be there
STARRING
At you
Yet a beautiful teeny tiny moment
The happiest you can remember
It will always be there too
Like a river streaming through you mind
Tinkling its joy to you
For always and never disappearing
But in a single second your time
Your wrinkled and beautiful line
Could
Be

G
O
N
E

What then?
What waits after?
Is there any SURE answer…
Or
ARE
You
Just
Nothing…
Maybe you will float in time
Expended there forever
Not moving
Yet not still
Life in itself is still very unanswered
And so is death
So all we have is an
UNKNOWN
Amount of flowing time
To pass it all by
What is done with this precious
TIME
Are decisions just made
By people like me and you
Wrong
And
RIGHT
But those are questions too
What is right?
And
What is wrong.
A single action
Could define a life
Make it
Or
Break it
It truly all is
TIMES decision…

Darkness creeps in through the creveces
Soaking the edges of my bright life with an unruly stain
I thought I had left it far behind me
But i found the stain too strong to remove completely
A slow moving storm trying to engulf my once happy world
Now which has become a dark nightmare I plead to wake from
A word can be erased but the indent from its pressure will always be there
And how can one remove such a mark
Forgetting is impossible
Running Unbearable
Giving in Unacceptable
I will forever be in it's ever darkening shadow
Such grim claws crushing me in their grasp
How could my body betray me so
Letting illness breach their sturdy walls
Once i was cancer ridden and sickly pale
My wishes are strong but
I cannot find myself a Wishing well
Don't let it happen again
PLEASE
Let it all be a bad dream
Let me still be healthy
Give me a light that will forever blind this darkness knocking at my doors
But if it is true
And I have come to repat history for a third time
Give me piece of mind
Let me live at least a life will fullness
And not one ruled by hospital beds
My fights have been fought conquered and won
Twice I was so lucky
If I should go to battle a third time
Pray that luck has been bestowed upon me a third
My light will never be snuffed
I shall shine as brightly as a thousand stars in a pitch black world
My darkness will always be here
But So will I
At least I know I will Try
Until The very day I die