Forcing myself to be alone is putting a lot into perspective
Like the fact that maybe I don't love you as much as I believe
I am still figuring that one out
But I have found myself on more than one occasion thinking about you
And when you do cross my mind I am reminded that you are not always on it the way you once were
I have been going on without you and I am doing fine
Sometimes it is harder than others but overall I have been better and I am getting better without you
I am doing good alone
Maybe we won't be together again.
Or maybe this is a temporary feeling.

Time.

When he told me he was in love with me, I didn't sweat it
Tomorrow he will probably say he has realized new things
And has had a change of heart
He is a roller coaster
A light switch
Untrusted
I feel bad that I do not take him seriously
He is human, but he does not let himself seem human
Therefore I do not feel bad that I do not feel bad
It makes sense if you think about it

knowing you're out there living, experiencing without me
it doesn't feel right and it never will
i don't want to hear stories
i don't want to see pictures
i want to tell the stories with you and laugh about things that aren't that funny unless you were there
i want to take pictures for you like i used to, and i want you to take pictures of me when i'm not paying attention..you always take good ones

are you a stranger now?
i have a feeling you'd treat me like one if we crossed paths again

Is it completely crazy for me to want to date other people so I can mess things up, put the pieces back together and learn from it? I want the combination of experiences to teach me how to love you selflessly, better than ever before, so it won't be your heart that aches once more.

How is it that I'm not ready for love
yet I surrender all willpower at the slightest mention of you
Am I ready? With out you is too bitter, too uneasy
Where did my home go?

I still get butterflies when you're on my mind
This feeling stays with me most of the time
I don't feel at home no matter where I go
I never have and fear I will never know

But your lips and those eyes, your hand in mine
Your love and embrace, all I see is your face
It's the closest to home that I ever feel
What we were wasn't perfect but it was so real

Patiently waiting, I'll try to remain
Afraid to approach you, not sure you're the same
But that is my fault, you are not to blame
For putting your walls up, you blew out your flame

My chest caves with every passing day
I try to be okay alone, and I can be
But the way your heart beats..
It doesn't feel right not to feel it with mine
I am to blame