Cheyanne Lynn

Cheyanne Lynn Feb 2015

My heart
it beats at a steady pace,
but when I see you it leaps off the charts

That was then,
Now,
It’s a different and new feeling,
It keeps building up inside me.

When I see you,
I see secrets and mysteries as dark as the night,
I’ve never seen them before,
They’re hidden away like the depths of the ocean,
I’d like to find them.

I see the way you get angry,
I see how you bring yourself down when it's not your fault.
I don’t see the old you anymore,
I see someone new.

It’s not just you though.
I feel your pain.
I feel your guilt.
I feel the different person that I have now become,
I have been opened to a new light,
Seen a new life.

All that we have now is
Silence.
It’s a frustrating silence,
That takes away a part of me
Every single day.
This silence,
Is deafening

Cheyanne Lynn Jan 2014

Jealousy is a sin.

Hearing that name come out of your mouth is like nails on a chalkboard.
irritating.
It happens all the time.
Obviously I let it slide because she's "just a friend".
None the less it still hurts.
I mean I should be used to it by now but do you even realize what something like that does to a girl like me?
I want to be okay with this, I really do.
But I just can't.
I can't not be the person I am.
It's my thing.
I care to much.
But I care a lot about you.
I love you.

Cheyanne Lynn Oct 2013

Learning to Love

If I ask you what you love the answers will likely roll off your tounge
You love to read,
you love to write,
you love to sing,
you love dogs,
tattoos music,
Your mom,
your brother,
your father,
your sister,
your best friend.
How long would this list have to go on and on for before you said I love myself?

Cheyanne Lynn Apr 2013

I thought you were supposed to be there for me?

Here's to you.
Another year with you gone.
I miss my best friend!
You were supposed to be there for me.
We were the three best friends.
I remember in music class you used to love "trapping" me in your legs.
I miss that.
I miss the time we went down to lake all because you wanted to see me.
You told me to go down there so I did. I drove myself just to see you before you left.
We spent the day together and then you left. you left for two weeks without talking to me.
When you came home you said you were sorry and that you told your family about me.
At the end of the Summer you came back into my life.
You were with your other best friend. You guys are like brothers.
I invited you to my sisters party and you came. You almost spent the night but you didn't.
You decided to leave and he stayed. He stayed because he cared
You left me. Again.
I never understood why.
In the middle of January you came back.
You spent yet another day with me.
It was freezing cold and I asked you to come to lake. I asked this time. And you came.
We had to go in town to get something and on the way you grabbed my hand.
That was the first time in a long time I felt safe.
But that all changed.
Months went by and I kept asking myself why? Why do I let you do this to me? Why do you keep coming in and out of my life?
What happened to the person I used to call my best friend?
He's not there anymore and I miss him.
No, I don't want to get back with you.
I have a boyfriend and I'm happy with him.
I just want our friendship back.
I want what we had the first day you came into my life
I want that back.

Cheyanne Lynn Apr 2013

Here's an invitation to my heart

I cant put it into words about how i feel. It's like trying to describe the taste of water I mean, I don't know what it is about you but when I look at you I'm home. You took all that sadness away from me and gave me hope. I'm not sure where'd I would be without you but I'm glad you stuck around. The ropes that used to hold me down, they're not there anymore. You cut right through and helped me out of that mess and then made me fall more and more in love with you. You make my world so different from what it was before. Your sole presence changed me so much in a small amount of time. I'm so thankful for that. And now that I know how much you love me there is no way I'm going back in that darkness I once called 'home' . With just one smile my way you can change my day.

You love fiercely and I love that. Even with all my bitterness and stupidity you saw past that and loved me for me. I know that no matter what happens you'll be there .You've always been there for me.

Every time I think of you, hear your name being said or I see something that has to do with you it makes the butterflies in my stomach flutter their wings so much I don't know what to do when I'm around except smile like an idiot. A smile I cannot control.

You own my heart and of that I'm sure. I can't deny it.

I could go on for eons with the many things that make me happy when I'm with you. Lists and lists of all the ways you make me smile.

Nights like these I think back and I ask myself this: " How could someone as perfect as him love someone as broken as me?" And then I remember every thing you said to me and how many times you've made me smile and I don't worry anymore. I know that you're going to stick around, but I'm always so worried you're going to leave..... I'm just glad I finally found someone I can be myself around.

Cheyanne Lynn Feb 2013

What you've become, I don't want to be apart of anymore.

When it comes to me being a part of your world it's like I don't even exist unless I'm at the rink.
You asked me to hang out and yet you were always with her having "Some big plans"
You knew that it was wrong yet you did nothing.
Do you ever stop and think " Could this have ended differently?" No, because you don't think.
I wanted this to finally be right, i thought I was finally happy.
Even your best friend thinks that this isn't okay,
He's been on my side and is there for me more than you.

Cheyanne Lynn Feb 2013

We are more than anything.

The fact of the matter is,
I cared, I still do and always will.
You're mine and I'm never letting that go.
I don't care where life takes us I just want you there with me.
I wouldn't want it any other way.